I would say it’s very possible that she’s interested in you.
You could consider asking her if she’d like to meet you somewhere for a snack after school or to lunch on a weekend for you to both get to know each other better.
You could say something too like “no pressure, I don’t want to make you uncomfortable, but I just wanted to ask.” Or “if you’re nervous, it doesn’t have to be a date. It can just be two classmates having lunch.” Or something casual like that. That might make her less nervous.
Thanks for this. It's definitely making me rethink starting a family with my husband as we had been discussing trying for next year, because I'm seeing this horribly judgmental and rigid side that hadn't come out before.
The dad assaulted her first. I don’t think the popo is going to care about the response. Also being in a foreign country with possible Language barriers is a potential obstacles. Not everyone involves the police in family business.
True! I know she mentioned she wasn't free until tomorrow night since she mentioned doing something tomorrow night after I asked her to go check said restaurant last Wednesday. Instead of me picking the day, she was the one to pick the day we met up. We agreed on Sunday due to mine and her availability and was okay with Sunday.
I did send a how was your weekend text an hour ago and pending a response. I was asking this question because I would think you would take a few seconds to check messages and respond so you don't let the other person think you don't wanna message or anything anymore.
Wouldn't you wanna be in contact with a match so you don't feel like you're being ghosted. She didn't say she wasn't busy to text but just said she wasn't free to do something until Tuesday night.
It seems like you lack empathy and understanding for people who do have higher sex drives and like sex. You will not be able to have a successful relationship with someone who values sex if that’s how you feel about it. You need to be upfront with people when dating that you don’t care about sex and will probably rarely want to have it and let them make that choice. Try looking for others who identify as asexual.
I wasn't trying to imply that he should have asked again, that's just what he said. He didn't want to “ruin the moment” by asking if she'd changed her mind and just went along with whatever was in his head. I was trying to break it down to simplest terms what was wrong with the scenario. She already said no, and he thought making sure he had her consent wasn't sexy.
You’re dealing with a mentally unstable man who seemingly can’t be alone. He’s latched on to you for whatever reason. He probably has a made up relationship in his head with you, partner or not. Your friendliness he took for interest, why he came to you to check for government bugs, etc. He will ramp up from emojis, and as hyperbolic as it sounds.. you’re in literal danger.
If you think you/he can handle it, sit down with him in public and explain in no uncertain terms that the friendship has begun to make you uncomfortable and you no longer wish to have contact with him. That sounds harsh, I know, but you need to be firm. Any politeness will be misconstrued. Do not have your partner there at the time, as he will be able to convince himself your partner is making you say these things. He still might go that route.
You might get lucky and he’ll stop. If he doesn’t, you need to file complaints with your landlord and the police. You may very well have to move, which is awful I know but for your own safety worth it.
I know this all sounds very dramatic, but a lonnnng time ago I lived in an apartment complex with a man like that. Every other month hauled off for mental issues. I took pity on him, and tried to be his friend. He attacked me one day coming up from the parking lot and I got lucky another (much larger) neighbor was taking out trash and stopped him. The police found he had zip ties and a stun gun on him. In the apartment they found shrines to me (I still feel nauseous even typing that). He had converted one of his bedrooms into a dungeon essentially. Boarded up the window, 8 locks on the door, bed with handcuffs. It was clear he planned on kidnapping me and holding me hostage. Even though he claimed mental illness made him think we were in a relationship at court (we were in a relationship but he knew he had to lock me in a room????)
Anyways, tldr…. Don’t trust anyone, especially mentally ill men. Cut ties, be harsh. NO POLITENESS.
I would say it’s very possible that she’s interested in you.
You could consider asking her if she’d like to meet you somewhere for a snack after school or to lunch on a weekend for you to both get to know each other better.
You could say something too like “no pressure, I don’t want to make you uncomfortable, but I just wanted to ask.” Or “if you’re nervous, it doesn’t have to be a date. It can just be two classmates having lunch.” Or something casual like that. That might make her less nervous.
Hopefully she’ll say yes!
Sad part is this seems more like infatuation than love. The fact that he is unavailable is feeding this feeling.
Maybe he needs to flush mid-poop and then again after if he’s causing that kind of situation. ?
You need to make better life choices. Your kid is dependent on you and your choices.
Thanks for this. It's definitely making me rethink starting a family with my husband as we had been discussing trying for next year, because I'm seeing this horribly judgmental and rigid side that hadn't come out before.
I mean no offense, but that's kind of validating. I feel similarly about my SO. To her, I describe it like a warm hug.
The opposite of cold blood in fact, I assure everyone here, it was very warm…
The dad assaulted her first. I don’t think the popo is going to care about the response. Also being in a foreign country with possible Language barriers is a potential obstacles. Not everyone involves the police in family business.
True! I know she mentioned she wasn't free until tomorrow night since she mentioned doing something tomorrow night after I asked her to go check said restaurant last Wednesday. Instead of me picking the day, she was the one to pick the day we met up. We agreed on Sunday due to mine and her availability and was okay with Sunday.
I did send a how was your weekend text an hour ago and pending a response. I was asking this question because I would think you would take a few seconds to check messages and respond so you don't let the other person think you don't wanna message or anything anymore.
Wouldn't you wanna be in contact with a match so you don't feel like you're being ghosted. She didn't say she wasn't busy to text but just said she wasn't free to do something until Tuesday night.
It seems like you lack empathy and understanding for people who do have higher sex drives and like sex. You will not be able to have a successful relationship with someone who values sex if that’s how you feel about it. You need to be upfront with people when dating that you don’t care about sex and will probably rarely want to have it and let them make that choice. Try looking for others who identify as asexual.
I wasn't trying to imply that he should have asked again, that's just what he said. He didn't want to “ruin the moment” by asking if she'd changed her mind and just went along with whatever was in his head. I was trying to break it down to simplest terms what was wrong with the scenario. She already said no, and he thought making sure he had her consent wasn't sexy.
You’re dealing with a mentally unstable man who seemingly can’t be alone. He’s latched on to you for whatever reason. He probably has a made up relationship in his head with you, partner or not. Your friendliness he took for interest, why he came to you to check for government bugs, etc. He will ramp up from emojis, and as hyperbolic as it sounds.. you’re in literal danger.
If you think you/he can handle it, sit down with him in public and explain in no uncertain terms that the friendship has begun to make you uncomfortable and you no longer wish to have contact with him. That sounds harsh, I know, but you need to be firm. Any politeness will be misconstrued. Do not have your partner there at the time, as he will be able to convince himself your partner is making you say these things. He still might go that route.
You might get lucky and he’ll stop. If he doesn’t, you need to file complaints with your landlord and the police. You may very well have to move, which is awful I know but for your own safety worth it.
I know this all sounds very dramatic, but a lonnnng time ago I lived in an apartment complex with a man like that. Every other month hauled off for mental issues. I took pity on him, and tried to be his friend. He attacked me one day coming up from the parking lot and I got lucky another (much larger) neighbor was taking out trash and stopped him. The police found he had zip ties and a stun gun on him. In the apartment they found shrines to me (I still feel nauseous even typing that). He had converted one of his bedrooms into a dungeon essentially. Boarded up the window, 8 locks on the door, bed with handcuffs. It was clear he planned on kidnapping me and holding me hostage. Even though he claimed mental illness made him think we were in a relationship at court (we were in a relationship but he knew he had to lock me in a room????)
Anyways, tldr…. Don’t trust anyone, especially mentally ill men. Cut ties, be harsh. NO POLITENESS.
You did know you would come at this point.