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The symptoms are physical. Their partner has mental illness. It reads as if it’s greater than just a guilt trip. Is it fair? No. I have no skin in the game, just holding space for both sides. The relationship needs to be ended but care should be taken.
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No. You’ll never go back to it. Finish your education. He will wait or move on but you need your career before you can move on. If something happens to him you’ll have nothing to fall back on.
No it’s not a big deal and you’re being immature. Sorry. It’s 1am and he’s lying in bed. Why would he stay up an extra hour just to text you? If you’re that worried about him finding out if you’re hurt or not immediately, wear a medalert bracelet instructing EMS to call him on scene. Otherwise I think if this is all you have to worry about then you have nothing to worry about.
Going through life not trying to force others to change or cater to your insecurities will bode much better for you long term. If the other person in your life feels appreciated, chances are better that you will too.
Most people have a “side” they show only during the most intense emotional states. Considering how much it has struck him, I wouldn't hold my breath about reconciliation.
Even if you do, he will likely want to try for a child again, thing is, considering your circumstances it might be difficult for you to conceive, which naturally would make your bf resent you again and probably leave for good.
Before anything else, you should ask yourself what you want going forward.
Maybe instead of asking us how we would feel in your wife's situation, take a look at yourself and ask why you refuse to put any effort in the woman who birthed your kids and promised to be with you for the rest of her life, don't you feel like you take her for granted? She could have spent these last 10 years living an amazing life and instead she has been neglected by you.
I would feel pretty guilty if I realized I had put more effort in some coworker than the love of my life.
What are you going to do about this revelation?
Eh, if she had anything else to hide then this would be a step into helping her feel safe and accepted. I wouldn’t be surprised if she had lost partners due to that past, and was afraid to say something for fear of losing him even if it was something that happened a decade ago. I’m sure there’s at least one thing in everyone’s 20’s that they don’t necessarily want to disclose haha.