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  1. She is emotionally abusing you.

    The thing that you have to understand is that her mental health is entirely her business. You are not responsible for fixing her, managing her, or keeping her alive. Don't set yourself on fire just to keep her warm.

    When you break up with her, record her suicide threat. If she abuses you before that, record that abuse. If she threatens to commit suicide on tape, you can all the police for an involuntary psychological hold. Then maybe she will get the help she needs to stop this abusive behavior.

  2. Why did you get into a relationship if you knew she had a concerning body count? Did you just receive this information?

  3. Yikes it's one thing to cheat on you, but to gaslight you so hard after is unacceptable.

    She is claiming it's a “joke”, but it's not funny.

  4. Thank you for this. I did send all of it, the pics of his responses to my pictures, his half naked pictures, his comments about her not being me etc.

    I hope we both block him honestly

  5. I understand why you feel tempted by the attention from someone else, but it is important to remember that how your girlfriend treats you does not define who you are. It's understandable that after such a long relationship and with two kids in the mix, it can be overwhelming to want something different in terms of intimacy or feeling desired.

    We should refocus on yourself first – what do YOU need right now? This will help provide clarity when it comes to making decisions regarding relationships – both current and prospective ones. Let us start by looking at current strategies for helping build up connection with your girlfriend again as well as examining any potential underlying issues affecting both of you separately so we can address those together.

  6. Lots of victims of abuse say they're not being abused.

    He's hitting/choking OP outside of the bedroom, which she did not consent to and has told him she doesn't like.

    What part of being hit by your partner (again, outside of their consensual sex) isn't abuse?

  7. I don’t think it bodes well that he wants to buy a house in his name only that you won’t have any claim on, and yet he expects you’d use your money to support the two of you if needed.

    What happens when you get pregnant? If you are planning to give up work you will be in a very vulnerable position.

    You should not marry or have children with this man unless the two of you can come to an agreement that protects you both. His attitude is a major red flag considering he wants you to have his children.

    At the moment everything is geared to serve his interests. Listen to your gut – it is 100% correct that this is a bad deal for you. ???

  8. It's actually a little weird he's been diagnosed as a sociopath. You have to see a doctor to get diagnosed, and sociopaths usually can slip through the cracks to avoid seeing a doctor. If he was forced to see a doctor, then that's really not good.

    You might want to strongly consider leaving. If he's telling you this now, things are fixing to go downhill from here. I know being a single parent is difficult, but staying will be worse.

    Good luck. I hope you find a way out of this.

  9. u/NoSweet981, it looks like you're trying to post a throwaway submission. Your account is too young and/or your comment karma is too low.

    The right way to do it is to create a brand new Reddit account that begins with ThrowRA.

    Please create a new account that starts with ThrowRA in the username and try again. Please note that we will not make exceptions to this rule.

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  10. That's…. that's not cool, at all. I love my husband dearly, and even 3 kids in, if he asked for a husband stitch, I would be serving him divorce papers as soon as i had the chance.. It isn't a joke, there are s many women out there who were given one without their knowledge or consent, and its just gross.. And pestering you for sex? really? That time period is there for you to HEAL. you have an OPEN WOUD inside you, and he wants to put his dick near it and jizz all over it? hell to the nope

  11. u/Unfair_Argument_1359, it looks like you're trying to post a throwaway submission. Your account is too young and/or your comment karma is too low.

    The right way to do it is to create a brand new Reddit account that begins with ThrowRA.

    Please create a new account that starts with ThrowRA in the username and try again. Please note that we will not make exceptions to this rule.

    I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

  12. Are you sure? Because you're living in a loft with a baby which isn't usually a sign of having that kind of flexibility (or you're saving up to move to a bigger place, which might also explain why your husband is reluctant to spend more). Also, are you taking time off work, that can lead people to worry about money even if the math looks good on paper.

  13. I had listed all the gifts my boyfriend had given me throughout our relationship. I asked if it is enough? What people failed to understand is I am on the verge of panic almost daily worrying: * Am I good enough? * Am I pretty enough? * Why would anybody love me? * I can't believe he treats me so good * There must be something wrong with me * I am not normal like everyone else * I bet I'm the only one who experiences this * Nobody cares about me

  14. Cringing at your partner asking a Michelin chef to modify his recipe for him is not being a stuck up, that shit is just as childish as it gets. He fits a Hooters

  15. It's meant as the absolute lowest limit, and it does work. At 37 you're mature enough to make that decision yourself.

  16. It's not the only option, but it's the best one in this situation. You don't want to be tied to this abusive man for the rest of your life, and you don't want a child to experience this abuse either.

  17. Fair enough But we dont even know what he means exactly Perhaps the kid wakes for a minute and falls asleep again very soon. Thats very common.

  18. Proud to have a partner who cheated not once but twice, lied to him about it everyday for 10 years and had to give up drinking to keep from doing it again. Yea that's something to be proud of.

  19. Just wait out the honeymoon phase and when his serotonin dies down he’ll learn that it’s not real (yet)

  20. How old is your youngest child? Especially when there are multiple kids, a mama can need two or three years to begin to feel a bit of thirst again, just from the way hormones promote bonding rather than mating. Too many people, both men and women, get the idea that ‘cleared to have sex’ postpartum means ‘ready to enjoy sex’ and feel like something is wrong when they just don’t feel any heat. It’s not abnormal. It does mean to keep expectations real, and ask questions about what actually feels good for your wife. It sounds like pleasure is elusive for her and she may not even have a good sense of what works for her at this life stage. If PIV sex doesn’t feel particularly good, or if sex takes over when your wife wants cuddling (those bonding hormones!) she might be feeling put off.

    You can try visiting with a couples therapist who specializes in sexuality to help you both have more open and productive conversations about pleasure and sex. I also recommend the show ‘Sex Rooms’ as a conversation starter, if you’re both down. It’s all about reclaiming pleasure when life has gotten in the way.

  21. Yes they did. It's in their second edit. The hookup and atleast one of the male roommates were pushing eachother.

  22. If your ex doesn’t know you are dating you are better off telling him before he finds out from someone

  23. Girl your kids are going to model your relationship. Do you want either of your babies to be in your position on way? Or turn out like your selfish husband? That is what you're doing by staying.

  24. Wtf are you talking about? My wife found 3 half-siblings she didn’t know about. I found a cousin I didn’t know about. It matched my first cousin perfectly among others that I did. Just bc people are doing it for fun doesn’t mean it’s some bullshit carnival game.

  25. That's really, really true. He's an awesome person, and I feel really awful for having this reactions. I now see the level of my misjudgment, thank you!

  26. This is controlling, manipulative, and very insecure of him. Youre better off without him, hon.

  27. My grandmother smoked for years in her house. When she moved across state lines in 1992 she gifted me a cabinet with glass doors. We left it in the garage for nearly six months, regularly cleaning it, and I can STILL in 2023 smell her cigarettes when I open the doors. It's faint, but it's there. (Honestly though it's faint enough that it's a nostalgia now and not disgusting, but it's taken forever to get it to that point)

    Dad bought her a house when she moved back years later and forbade her from smoking in the house, we could tell she still did it, just not every day. Ticked him right off.

  28. Why would you want to have someone in your life who despises your daughter, doesn't want her around, who keeps you on your backfoot by blaming you for your life, who manipulates you into twisting yourself up in knots so she can see what other demands she can get you to capitulate to and has conditioned you to worry that she'll leave. If she was going to leave, she would have a long time ago. I wonder why you haven't left her a long time ago.

  29. If you sent it to him after waxing like straight after im gonna say that's what he was referring too. The skin irritation. Now, that's an incredibly stupid thing to say. If you are looking at something inbetween a person's knees and belly button, it's my advice that you don't ever say anything negative at all because it's too close to home.

    My more kind interpretation is that your boyfriend is just silly and goofy and needs to think a little harder and apologising is the right move.

    If this was once the irritation was gone and there was nothing other than clean and healthy skin with the hair and whatever may or may not have been in the photo, then your boyfriend is actually kinda evil. That's not something you shouldn't say to people that's fucked up.

    What to do now after you've forgiven him but you're left with this mental block. I recommend taking it slow. Would the idea of maybe him going all out for you and making a sensual night about you help? Think about what it is that can get you in the mood. Try taking it slow and be sexual woth clothes on and see if that warms you up to the idea of sharing yourself with him. Maybe trying over the clothes stuff, that could help as he can't see anything. Baby steps is key and I think finding safer ways to incorporate sexual intimacy that take time and respect boundaries is key to this.

  30. Look, it’s your body, your choice. It’s not like you’re asking him to partake. At the same time, there is no rule saying you have to tell him.

  31. I sent him the info for someone I know that is far better than me for this. I also told her about the situation. I probably should have started with talking to her cuz she said the same thing. I'm turning it over to her.

  32. Exactly, like are we 10! What a juvenile excuse! Smh…of all the excuses, this is the best he could have done? No restaurants etc to go to? Like come on dude, you're almost 50!

    Op, get the STD test done while leaving this pathetic person.

  33. It's harassment if they didn't want to be asked in the first place, not simply if they say no.

  34. Love is not a solid reason to remain in a toxic abusive relationship.

    You sound desperate and codependent on her. Read some self help books, hit the gym, take up a new hobby and build your own life.

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