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Room for online sex video chat teena_sweet
Model from: lk
Languages: en
Birth Date: 1975-02-16
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Subculture: subcultureRomantic
Date: October 31, 2022
You screwed up a possible relationship by trying to get with your ex, for silly reasons to boot. It doesn't really matter if you were technically together or technically cheating, she's not going to trust you now. And talking about having videos was just dumb man. I doubt you can salvage this.
Because it's fake
Thank you for the reply.
I would say we are quite close, we are ldr ish but spend 50% of our time together in real life.
We have already had to deal with obstacles and heartbreak together, he is ( or used to be maybe?) my best friend.
I am also his first relationship which may explain some of our past and some of the right now.
We used to have very attentive sex but the last 2 months it’s been more and more a session of emptying the load. The last time we was together we also always ended up doing it half dressed infont of the TV. This time was worse though, there was barely affection at all which has not been the case before.
That’s almost scarier lol
Honestly I'd just let him go on his trip and then come back to an empty bedroom with a note on the table.
Notice I said “women in their early 20s” and “in that manner” loll
update to the update lol: she never called. I’m not sure why I’m assuming she fell asleep. She texted me at 9:00 “I miss you” I replied & then I texted again at 10:00 if she was calling soon because I do have to get to bed for work and almost 2 hours later never got a reply. I’m kind of disappointed and annoyed. I was looking forward to seeing what would happen in the call i feel like this kinda shows I’m still not at all a priority. but oh well
Congratulations on your new freedom ?
Hey, I feel you. I've been through a very similar experience where I felt and had the same thoughts as you. I was always feeling sorry for not being considerate enough, always apologizing for every small thing, and thinking that everything was my fault. No matter what, no matter how hard I tried to make things right, somehow, I was to blame.
It wasn't until after the relationship ended that I realized he was emotionally abusive and manipulative and how much that fucked me up mentally.
It's so so hard to see it when you're in a toxic relationship, but I just want you to know that you are worth it. You are enough. It's not your fault.
Your wife shouldn’t be friends with him at all..
Stay out of it. This is something she should bring up with her bf, not you. If that’s enough to rock the relationship, then it doesn’t have what it takes to go the distance.
you do not need anyone's permission. You do not need to save his feelings. No is a complete sentence
I just wanted everybody to read this part again. 10/10, great stuff.
You're being delusional. Perhaps the bluntness of the commenters will make you see the truth.
You know how abusers say “look what you made me do”? This time it's his mother “influencing” him, next time it will be work stress, next time it will be his favourite sport team lost and then it's just gonna be your fault for not being perfect.
It doesn't matter why he hit you, he did and he will do so again. You're trying to excuse his behaviour because you don't want to admit your husband hit you simply because he decided to.
Stolen from u/fubar_68
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Tell her maybe it's the field that you are playing on that is too damn big.
You might as well come out and say how you feel. Worst case scenario is he rejects you, but you are no worse off then as you are now not having the one you want.
If he rejects you, I would suggest ending the friendship and going no contact. It's not that he did anything wrong, but you aren't showing any signs of getting over him. It's even affecting your relationships with other people. I don't see any other way to get past him if you are still in contact each day.
Who knows, he might confess he was hiding his feelings because was afraid you would end their friendship. He might actually feel the same way. At least take the dive and see what he says. YOLO!
Someone’s got main character syndrome.
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Because op deleted and changed information?
Your friend is gaslighting you, if he really thought that it wasn’t a problem and you wouldn’t be mad, he wouldn’t have kept it a secret. He’s a shitty friend and he knows it.
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No worries, I hope everything's good for you!
I just wonder how long they've actually been dating or living together such that now he has a problem with her crying? Like was the time they lived together just a week before they got married? He knew how she was and still married her.
Is it a marriage or just a wedding you don't want?
Have you considered the legal benefits of being married instead of “just” partners?
If you don't care about marriage, why don't you just do it for her if it's important to her, what's the big deal if you plan on staying togheter anyway?
Are there any big reason you feel so strongly about this, that can strongly argue against getting married? Trauma, legal reasons?
25 is still young. Maybe you'll get married at 35, maybe never.
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/u/-_Skinwalkin_- remember that you can get STD’s like chlamydia without having sex. All it takes is fluid exchange from infected person to non-infected person Its rare though but do take it into account.
It was a bad move but you’re not going to get helpful responses in this sub. I suggest r/marriage or r/parents.
If you guys have a young baby your life is super chaotic right now. Everyone’s on edge and it’s important to show yourselves and each other as much grace as possible. Forgive yourself and then ask for his forgiveness:
Next step is a vulnerable apology. You know what you did was wrong. Say that. Then delve into why you got so upset in the first place. You have to figure that out. Did you feel like you weren’t good enough? Whatever it is it at the root will be raw and uncomfortable. You need to identify it and reveal it to him. And then go back to your apology. Delve into how he might have felt opening that mean lunch in front of his coworkers (embarrassed? Bullied? Ashamed? Hurt.) and how you never want to make him feel that way.
Do it like this and you two will grow stronger from this.
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I’m old and grumpy this morning so take this with a pinch of salt.
Someone who books a one way ticket across the world for an undecided length of time is not committed to the relationship right now.
She could be gone 1 week or 5 years, and you have to accept the person who comes back (if they come back) isn’t going to be the same as the one leaving.
Advice: mutually break up, not a break or on hold, actually break up and leave single. Live your lives, date other people if you feel like it or don’t. But don’t sit at home pinning over her while she’s out there. You’ll make yourself ill.
At the very most ask her to let you know when she’s back so you can catch up.
Is this in the context of online dating?
Either way, yeah, some people, (and it's not just men) will search/focus younger… or in some cases, older.
If you're trying to gauge a specific individual's interest then best just to ask them. At the very least it's an answer to whether or not you're wasting any more time.
May I suggest just asking him?
You’re right that he’s not going to change his mind but telling someone who’s grieving the loss of the relationship with the person they thought they were going to grow old with not to let it “cause turmoil” is incredibly unhelpful and lacks empathy, which is why you’re getting down voted.
You are the opposite of a gift
Girl, buy you own condoms. Don’t put you future in someone else’s hands.
This. I thought she was staying hours on end. An hour or so isn’t unreasonable given that she spends that time literally working for them.
He is the only guy that made me wonder if I was actually right or wrong. I have always been decisive and would never let anyone be this shitty to me. I even told him once in a fight that he was psychologically abusing me and he even laugh I mean, he doesn't even know he is being a horrible person…
You deserve to feel safe and happy whenever you have sex, too. I know its hard but you need to communicate your feelings openly and honestly and tell him you are simply not into this kink and you don't enjoy sex when it's rough like that.
Either its a dealbreaker and he walks away or he's willing to not have kinky sex anymore. But it's best to potentially cut ties now rather than waiting and investing more time and energy into a relationship with a partner you're simply not sexually compatible with
Thank you so much 🙁 I agree, there definitely has to be men who are happily monogamous. It’s just hard because he basically shoved the idea that no man is monogamous down my throat for months on end, now I have to start over and basically retrain my way of thinking since he corrupted it so much:(
People don’t realize or are just very ignorant to how mentally taxing (and abusive) an insecure person can be.
I’m sorry you’ve dealt with that my friend. I can feel your exhaustion through your words, just as I’m sure that you’re familiar with the reality that my sympathy is grounded in.
WTF, my man. “Only” 5 years? And that isn't enough to know if you want to marry? You need to be together ~15 years first?
You guys aren't children anymore. If she's as great as you say, either man up and get serious or let her go find someone who will.
The fact you completely ignore of how law works of what I just explained. Good luck 🙂
I really dislike the stigma around paternity testing. There’s many reasons why men would want to get a paternity test, and yes sometimes it is out of insecurity, which everyone has one. However, if someone is themselves the product of paternity fraud or has been cheated on before, I don’t see how someone couldn’t understand where that man is coming from? If it’s out of nowhere, that’s one thing but there are valid reasons other than just suspicion to want one.
But anyways also, can’t he just get one anyways and not bring it up if he’s so concerned?
You need to back off and leave his family alone in regards to the note. I am sorry you are experiencing this loss, but I promise it’s nothing compared to what they’re experiencing. There are probably good reasons they’re keeping the note private and they probably shouldn’t have mentioned it to you. There are so many things that come with the death of immediate family that unless you’ve been in that position yourself, it’s very hard to conceptualize. Focus on getting into therapy and working on your own healing. Accept that you will probably never see that note and that’s okay. It will only hurt to dwell on it when you have no control over it. It’s going to be difficult, but it’s what you need to do for your own well-being.
Communication works great when the person you're communicating with isn't a lying cheater. I agree he should say something but imo whatever she says back is of no value.
The lightning makes it hard to even see her ass honestly
I wonder if the contents of the note put the son in a bad light so they don’t want to disclose it to her.
Okay yeah no, it's really weird that he keeps insisting on this then. What's so bad about listening to you here? Just because what, then he doesn't get his way exactly how he wants it?
If this breaks the relationship…it wasn't really about the dog. Sometimes things that break relationships seem small by themselves, but the real issue is why they weren't able to be resolved.
It's not stupid and small to want to be with someone who's willing to listen to you about shit that could so easily be resolved (and cost him nothing) if he approached it cooperatively.
Is he just using you for intimacy or convenience? This guy knows how to treat family and friends but not how to treat a SO. That’s ridiculous. I don’t know why you’d put up with that for years. Please have some self worth. This isn’t normal to be treated like a side partner just cuz he lives at home.
You have zero self respect by tolerating any of this. Your friends and family are right. You’re going to ruin your life because of a loser, that’s so sad.
If you’re going to stay with him, stop internalizing his preference. His preoccupation with vulvas is weird. That doesn’t mean you need to cover up if that isn’t your preference. I would also stop bringing it up if I had no plans to leave. I don’t bring up my weight to my husband. He either accepts it or doesn’t.
A family member stopped smoking when my mother was expecting me so they could be near her and later near baby me without risking her being sensitive to the smell. Several years later, learning someone quit smoking “for me” helped me quit smoking as well.
How long were she and her ex dating?
Wait a minute! Your soon to be Ex boyfriend is texting another girl behind your back? Because deleting messages is a thing, how do you know this isn't 10 times worse? This is a betrayal at this point and could be evidence that he is choosing her.
Oh, he's going to read this?
What kind of (words that get me banned) keeps in contact with a toxic ex-friend of a gf? A cheater or manipulator.
Oh, awkward? If you ever choose to become friends with this ex again, he can unblock her with your permission. There is no reason for a guy to be talking to a former friend of yours!
It could really have gone both ways IMO
Yeah. I have a very big, very not close-knit extended family, that does not have any kind of group texts that I know about.
My wife has a very big, very close-knit, extended family who are constantly going on about this, or that, or nothing at all. I just mute the groups, and never check them unless my wife tells me someone asked me something.
What is the lie you caught him in, and what lie did he tell on top of that?
You need to speak to a lawyer. His not wearing a wedding band, showering at her place, inviting her to events meant to invest in your and his relationship, and not objecting to her inviting herself along to meet his kids all seem like things went further than an emotional affair.
Only an asshole entertains exes behind their spouses back. Very simple.
It doesn’t matter what 10000 internet strangers think. If this is CHEATING TO YOU, then he cheated. Go from there.
The Mother of the child works two days a week. She also needs to put her child first and supply what their child needs. He shouldn’t enable the mother to take advantage of him. I say this because breaking up separating and then asking him to pay over the required child support and provide living expenses for an adult is selfish and taking advantage of him.
She changed the status of their relationship but doesn’t want to be uncomfortable or make any changes to her living situation ( working more hours).
I have talked to him about this, I offered to join him in skateboarding and he agreed to that and we agreed to plan one day out of the week to do something different. We never lived up to either of those things
Platonic. You need to date right away, matter of fact you shouldn't. Not everyone is like your ex, you will find someone in due time. It will be alright
We're concerned for the mothers health man, get a clue
So you both agreed to work on you respecting privacy and him not flirting. But then you didn't respect his privacy, but also found he was still being flirty?
He was remorseful that you found out, but not enough to come clean on his own.
From the sounds of it, this is likely to be a pattern if you decide to stay together.
He wanted to cheat and he’s blaming you for it. It’s strategic though. He’s trying to make you believe that he can treat you like shit and it’ll be because you deserve it. So, going forward he can treat you like shit and you’ll accept it.
Oh so basically you, again, told him to put his life on hold waiting for you. . . . You really, honestly need therapy and maturity before pursuing any further relationships.
Some questions have very manipulative undertones. Asking why he had to post about being happy can seem like “why don't you miss me” and he's specifically trying to be happy and selfish right now. He has that right. She does, too. I wouldn't want to deal with my ex complaining I wasn't making them happy by being happy, either.
“I feel like i got fucked by this fictional man” sent my sides into orbit i am sorry
And yet, he is still with her. Wonder how many idiots he has said are his soul mates over those years of cheating?
Thank you. I've blocked him on social media, and trying not to think about what he's up to.
Thank you for explaining, obviously it's fine to not be compatible with someone who's into partying, and completely normal to want someone with a similar lifestyle most of the time. But if it's occasionally from time to time I can't see the harm and I guess it's the late night bit I don't understand, I don't see what changes after midnight that it's no longer ok to be in a bar. In any case OP's boyfriend got together with her knowing she liked to go out. That's what I don't think is ok, suddenly asking her to change.
If this man is 50 years old and hasn't figured out how to gracefully handle this kind of conversation keep it moving. Set up or not he could have easily said something along the lines of, but you wear it so well. Or we all still wish we had our youth but you're still beautiful. Something! At 50? He is clearly a dummy and isn't going to be aware of your feelings. Or he could be one of those assholes that love to make women feel insecure so he can control them. Either way, you deserve better.
PS. Please be kind to yourself. You have brought life into this world and that is no easy feat. You are beautiful. Always.
Thank you! Some common sense…dude just busted a nut with you…probably just wants to chill and enjoy his post nut clarity not be grilled and quizzed.
And Moro just nodded and said yup
Thank you for this perspective. I'm sorry you went through all you did to end up with your happiness.
Don't know if it helps but he is not addicted if he does it 2 times a week. And from a guy's perspective it's just a short wank, post nut clarity sets in, he never thinks about her again. You don't have to be perfect etc. I mean you don't expect him to be the man out of a romance novel either.
Relationships that survive infidelity do so by people examining what their motivation was to cheat. She was honest with you about her actions. If the relationship is to continue then she needs to work out why she did it and what she can do to prevent that happening again, and stick to that plan.
He violently raped you. Choking is very often a precursor to deadly violence. Please get out. You don’t deserve this, and it isn’t normal.
OP! This IS rape! And you don't have to forgive him! Not only was it nonconsensual, but it was also violent. You've probably showered but honestly, you should go to the police and press charges. And please, speak to a counselor or therapist or someone you can trust if you're not ready for that. I'm so, so sorry this happened to you!
Do you think a sincere apology would make you feel better about this? Or talking about it again? What can she do to fix this, or how can she show you that she truly didn’t mean to hurt your feelings (assuming that’s the case)? Once you figure this out, you can sit down and have a conversation about it again. But there’s no use talking more about it, unless there’s the possibility that you could come out feeling better. Figure out what you need from her.
This seems to be a somewhat common issue, based on posts I’ve seen here before. Everybody has a different perspective. Some people say a person can’t control their preferences, and if their partner no longer fits their preference, they have every right to leave or tell them. Some people say if you really love someone, their appearance shouldn’t matter. Some people would like to know straight-up if the issue is their physical appearance, some would rather their partner beat around the bush and push them in the right direction without confirming or denying that. It’s a sensitive issue, because many people are insecure about their physical appearance. I, personally, would argue that there’s no “right” way to tell your partner you’ve become less attracted to them. There’s really no way to say that without hurting them. But, if that is the issue… there’s also no way to NOT say it without also hurting them in the long run. Had she not come out and told you this, you’d have probably begun to notice her withdrawing physically without ever knowing why, which arguably would have been just as hurtful as being told she’s not attracted to you.
Brutal honesty is not always the best policy in a relationship, but many people still value it and want to be upfront with their partner, even if it’s something bad. This is an impossible subject where nobody can come out unscathed. She isn’t wrong for feeling this way, and you aren’t wrong for being hurt by it. She cannot control her attraction, and you cannot control your emotional reaction. I think, based on your post, that she feels very bad about hurting you. But doesn’t know how to bring it up again without rehashing your feelings. That’s why you should figure out what is going to fix this for you, what could possibly make you feel better… and talk about that with her. She will more than likely be receptive to this, since it seems you really love eachother.
Just because a relationship ends doesn’t mean it was a failure or a waste of time. When the relationship is no longer serving either of you it’s time to end it. Not every bf/gf is meant to be a forever-partnership, and that’s fine and normal. I would venture to say that a relationship where you enjoyed each other, but are able realize that it has reached its conclusion before it turns ugly, is actually a successful one.
Or you could just breakup with him and not have to worry about his shenanigans anymore. He was looking for a happy ending from whatever woman and yeah no no one posts that without the intention of getting the service, what would be the point in posting ? He's cheating on you his lack of success doesn't matter.
Thanks and I don't think I'm an extreme anomaly so hopefully I won't have a serious problem if I'm careful
Thank you, I appreciate your comment. We eat relatively well, he cooks often and it’s always healthy / fresh. I snack often and my snacks aren’t healthy, but I don’t want to eat healthily all the time.
Naaah there is no way you're staying with a woman who is actively seeking male validation outside the relationship.
I don’t. Just drags it on. Ask soon.
What did you post before? I got an update notification but your profile and comments are empty.
I vaguely remember reading something like this from a bf's perspective
Something ain't right here ?…
Mention how goofy the picture on your license looks and challenge her to show hers in a playful manner.
Just because someone has issues doesnt give him/her the right to project the problems onto other people.. she can not make you and your son suffer just because she has problems. And limiting your contact with your ex and cutting her out eventually will definetly damage everything. You cannot make your gf feel better… she needs to get help and work with a therapist.
Are you a doctor? Because you’re making an awful lot of really outrageous declarations here.
Blocked him after he said they weren’t his. After he told her to go tell her other “boyfriends” they’re theirs. After he said she would just get an abortion anyways. He didn’t want the kids. He didn’t care she was pregnant. He knew she was when she told him. Replying with ANGER about a pregnancy is never okay
You need to treat your depression and get into fitness.
I really appreciate this. I hope we can get over it and I’ll face any consequences just to keep our relationship. Thank you and I’ll keep u guys updated regarding this.
Its doubtful anything would happen with that in future. Really need a rape kit done before showering.
embarrassing thing
Nothing to be embarassed about. I told gfs. Never any family.
Glamour camping. It’s what people who don’t like the real roughing it aspect of camping will do. Get the perks of the wilderness without sleeping on the ground in a tent, though I have seen some pretty decked out tents with blowup mattresses and other comforts
Dude, break up with her!! She could be your mom!
Could we not pretend bjj sparring isn't completely different from these examples?
Like, I'm poly.
My two partners both have other boyfriends. I'm not jealous or insecure.
But y'all jokes are dismissive.
Wrestling with dudes is not on par with talking to them at work though.
A better comparison would be your boyfriend taking up blues dancing.
I would be LIVID. Fuck that dude