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Room for online sex video chat NattCastillo
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Date: September 24, 2022
Dump the loser
Not normal. Definitely cheating.
So its weird to ask a partner who they're with and being interested in it?
Money spending should be able to come with a clear cut and dry response. If you say you can’t afford something that is unnecessary, there is no argument to be had. Even if you go out and get things for yourself that you don’t need that add up to that amount per month. (ie Starbucks every day + getting your nails done.) It’s not your job to appease his family traditions. If he wants you involved and you can’t afford it, he should pay for it. Also, whatever debt you’re having to pay $6k off in 2 months is NUTS. Far better ways to invest that same money and pay minimum payments on the debt over a longer period of time.
You can marry anyone you like. Anyone who judges you for it is wrong.
Physical intimacy is basically 1/3 of a man's needs. You can't ignore that and expect a healthy relationship
Her commute to work so she should pay for it. I'm sure she managed before so she can do it now. That's a ridiculous excuse to be using you working from home as a reason to justify you helping to pay.
I had to scroll way, way too far to see someone bringing up the fact that he was drunk. The account as it reads here is SA. People who are blackout drunk cannot consent.
Being assaulted is not cheating.
Six months in and he’s basically telling you to not make friends. Shits weird bro. You can literally hang out with anyone you want. From what you’ve written it seems that you guys have talked about it but he’s a brick wall. Some men believe you can’t be friends with the “opposite sex” but that’s outdated af.
This reminds me of my own husband and his brother and father.
Soooo annoying to watch. He's less like that if it's just the two of us these days.
Not always about men. You can baby trap so he can feel the pressure to continue staying in the relationship, for example…
Stop blaming society. Polyamory is accepted. But you are cheating. Why? Your partner clearly doesn’t want an open or poly relationship. So cut contact to one of them and start being a decent human being.
Trust me I've gone through all the implications of her doing this work for her. The worst part is last year during S' 2nd year qualification, my gf did most of that for her as well and wr had the same arguments
I do feel bad for arguing with my gf though as I shouldn't have done that, as you said she feels low enough already but I just felt so frustrated and helpless, I want her to start being tougher you know?
king thing is true, she very rarely drinks for the past 10 years. But thats not really the point anymore.
it's not fine even if she changed now.
Holy shit. it doesnt matter. She can't proof that she is a person you can ever trust again. Trust isn't something you can repair. Once you fold a sheet of paper…it can't ever be smooth again.
Hi OP!
Both of my parents were alcoholics my entire childhood, and still are for the most part but have cut back on liquor in favor of beer.
I understand that feeling of dread you mentioned at the end, and had to come to grips with it myself in a hard way.
I'll spare you the details of my life, but I left home around 17, moved states at 20 and didn't come home or visit for 4 years because of it.
They would always cry to me about how much they missed me and wanted me to come home, but if I ever did I spent my time zoning out at the table, in my room or on the porch while they drank themsves into a stupor every night.
What I think helped facilitate some change is a hard “coming to Jesus” moment with me texting my dad.
He usually texted me absolute nonsense and I couldn't stand it anymore. I told him that he drinks so much to cope with something wrong or something he's missing inside. He had a wound somewhere in his life that he was ignoring and needed to find it, dig out the rot and heal himself before I could come home and see them again. I know he was depressed. He's worked HARD my entire life to provide for us and I know that would make anyone unhappy. I pushed HARD for them to do things besides drink together. It was pretty brutal.
Idk if that helped them, but they go to dinners, lunches, have actual friends now, take road trips when otherwise they'd just be home drinking.
Tell your father how you feel about his drinking, honestly. You're his daughter.
Does he have any family or support at home?
You should also check out “ACOA, Adult Children Of Alcoholics” on Google or on Reddit. It will give you some insight I wish I had when I was your age.
If the idea of seeing her again genuinely helped you get through each day, then she provided you a big gift. I think further down the road maybe you’ll see that, when you’re happy again.
I am dorry, but between your gf and landlord only one is significant person in your life. Don't be surprised if it makes your gf question your priorities. Your landlord trip is not your problem.
Going to different universities is how most high school relationships end. While that particular situation might have been nothing, it's unlikely you two will make it in what is essentially a long distance relationship while both of you are at two different campus situations far away from each other.
If you want to try and make this work you just tell him you don't want him to be that close with other girls. Plain and simple really. On another note, yeah apparently having close friends of opposite gender is normal, at least that's what I'm being told on regular basis, but I will always maintain that it's an instant red flag for me personally. There's just nothing good that may ever come out of such a situation. Even if you do want to be with a guy who does have these kinds of friends, you are obviously within your rights to ask him to limit being physical with them, or leave if he refuses.
We don't have to figure out why men make poor choices – it's a waste of energy. What we can do is leave them when they make poor choices so we don't have to deal with it anymore.
I guess this is where you screenshot your chat and post it on r/choosingbeggers
You can leave someone over anything. You look down on your boyfriend for something that makes him happy and brings him fulfillment. You're embarrassed by him and want someone who makes more money. If neither of you want to change, you are not compatible.
Tell her that getting married without ever having seen each other in person is a really bad idea. Tell her that she's wrong about getting old: tell her that the worldwide average age, at time of first marriage, is 28 for men and 26 for women. Tell her that she needs to get serious about other compromises, like actually moving in together, before it's even vaguely realistic to discuss marriage.
…or, don't, and just break up with her. I know that sounds heartless, and to a certain extent it is, but here is another heartless truth: This isn't your problem to solve. It's not your job to conquer her insecurities for her; she must do that for herself. You can help, of course… But only if she wants the help, only if she wants to change. If she doesn't, there's no sensible response but to break up with her.
No, it's not. Respecting your partner and your current relationship has nothing to do with gender.
If she's keeping videos of herself being intimate with her ex, assume she will do the same with any videos or nudes she gets from you. Also, depending on how old her and her ex were in the video, it'd fall under CP. She would wanna be careful.
There’s probably 6 other men giving her money. Run. You don’t owe her your paycheck.
“He's a nice guy and I want to minimise the hurt.”
No he's not and I wouldn't give two effs if he's “hurt” or not because he's a straight up asshole.
Please, as an asexual person who has been relationship shy my whole life because I don’t want anyone to feel trapped by me and my conditions, just be real with her. It’s probably crossed her mind more than a few times that you may have needs that aren’t being met. She might even support you having sexual relationships with other people. But if she loves you I know she doesn’t want you to feel like a relationship with her is hurting you in any way.
Because I let her live in my house rent free, she doesn’t pay for the food she eats or rent or utilities. Her mother kicked her out when she started dating me due to my age (I told her that we should break up and she should keep living with her mother). She blew up at her mother instead, it felt like my responsibility to let her live with me free of charge if the reason she couldn’t go back home was choosing to be with me.
Her car isn’t more valuable to me than she is, my daughter is more valuable to me than she is.
Okay.
Hey OP. I'm sorry nobody here is showing you empathy ; having been an asshole younger doesn't mean it's okay you got beaten by somebody who was (and know he was) way stronger than you. Two wrongs don't make a right.
I know I'll get downvoted for that, but no, I don't think you can judge somebody from what they did in their teenage years for the rest of their life.
That guy took years of anger against you into those 5 minutes. It'll be hard to apologize because it'll sounds like you did that just because he beat you. You can try, but don't insist. You may have to find a new place to train though. Honestly, if he does that again, you'd be right to even report him to the place – yup, that's fucking assault, nevermind the past.
He raped you. Once is too many times already. He's probably raped previous partners if he did it so easily to you, despite you actively trying to fight.
Thank you that sounds like a constructive way to make sense of this. I'll have to do some research and find a place. Thanks again.
You’re the worst. I hope you realize that. You’re married with a toddler & you’re having a secret relationship with a woman behind your wife & child’s back. Katie gets the best of you, not your wife.
The worst bit is that you started your flirtation with Katie before you even got married. And don’t say “it wasn’t like that” because it absolutely was.
Now you want to walk away from your mean old wife and your burdensome child to be with Katie, but only if Katie’s a sure thing. Again, you’re the worst.
If you want to leave your wife and kid, do that. But do that BEFORE you know if you and Katie are going somewhere.
Your wife and your kid obviously deserve someone better – someone who doesn’t lie every single day and who doesn’t give the best of himself to someone else.
I would say that you could recommit to your marriage, but given what you’ve written here, your marriage was never a commitment you took seriously.
Leave your wife or don’t, but if you stay, cut Katie out of your life & start therapy.
Stop being the most selfish person in any room.
Your wife is not being honest. For such a religious woman, she can't open her heart and be understanding that this news of having a 13 kid was a surprise to you too???
You are giving her way too much credit. She's only thinking about herself. And the fact she cannot give one FUCKING HONEST ANSWER AS TO WHY THESE NEWS made her just want to up and leave you…..that's not a good wife. A good wife would open her heart and tell you exactly what is bothering her and scaring her.
She's treating you like trash and I'm not even surprised she doesn't want to go to couples counseling.
Yes, hopefully telling him is enough. But she's already asked to him get a new place and he hasn't. He could still refuse to leave and she'd be forced to get an eviction notice from a judge. Time to make his stay a lot less pleasant.
Doesn’t seem like either of you is actually committed to monogamy. Also doesn’t seem like either of you is trustworthy enough for an open relationship to actually work. You’re doomed on both fronts because neither of you is trustworthy. No matter what type of relationship you have, trust and honesty is a requirement.
You can still be friends with him but tell him you’d like less touching. I’m a low touch person too except with romantic partners. I’ve told friends before “it’s nothing about you, I just get overwhelmed sometimes by touch. Sometimes touch feels icky and as my friend I don’t want to ever feel ick towards you so I’d like to say unless one of us asks first, please no touching or hugs.”
Git off the tit. I have a low tolerance for anyone that is a huge cry baby. Rub some dirt and move on. You're young still. Break up. Don't comfort him. Is he the youngest in his family? He's giving major “baby boy” vibes. Ick.
I read on a different thread about a guy who was in a similar situation. He said he was gonna go out for something and ask her to get dinner and wine and see her reaction.
I just told her I'm going for a trim and told her to get dinner and a bottle of wine. Let's see how it goes.
That's not a marriage, if she's showing no desire to improve the situation then move on and divorce, any counselling will be pointless if she can't be bothered.