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Khalipso, y.o.
Location: United States
Room subject: oil booty @ 20 goals
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Date: November 5, 2022
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All abusers are very loving in the beginning. They shower you with affection and gifts to lower your defenses and make you relax. Then they make you marry them or get you with child and that’s when the trap snaps and their whole demeanor changes. That’s the strategy. Don’t be fooled.
I don’t understand why it would be infuriating.
Do you actually not understand? Or do you personally just not feel like this.
Even if you don't hold this opinion yourself, surely it's not some big logical leap to understand why that could feel a bit shit right?
If my partner was making my salary but working half as hard as me I would feel like my time was half as valuable. I'd also be watching someone close to me sit around and hang out for half the week while I'm working which would understandably cause some jealous feelings.
This is not complicated why it could upset someone, even if it wouldn't upset you.
It seems that you are committed to improving this relationship. Him, not so much. You are at the beginning of what might be a very exciting and happy life. You don't need an anchor to hold you back. There are men out there that actually appreciate sharing with the right woman. This man is too much interested in himself to be seriously interested on you. You deserve better.
I guess the best thing I can say to you is this: how do you want to see yourself? Do you want to see yourself as this guy who is hanging onto every little detail and analyzing them and not able to move on? Because that is the way you seem to me and, as harsh as it might sound, it is not a very desirable way to be.
I get it though, it can be difficult to accept the things your gf did before you both got together, but you really have to either accept it and move on or take it as something you can’t get over and break up. IMO, if she said it was a small thing with him and it was before you got together more or less officially, then that’s what you gotta believe. What more can she say or do to prove it to you, ya know?
Trust and confidence are extremely important components to a strong relationship. Confidence in yourself and trust in your gf will actually make her want to be in your relationship more. On the other hand, insecurity can straight up kill a relationship.