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OIL IN THE ASS [150 tokens remaining]
Date: October 14, 2022
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I didn’t even realize people still listed or updated their relationship status on Facebook. Maybe it’s an age thing, I’m in my 30s, but a lot of people I know don’t bother to update their FB relationship status and/or consider it immature (the exception being people who are engaged or married).
Getting that information through friends is better but the best thing to do is straight up ask her if she’s seeing anyone, depending on how close your mutual friends are to her they might not be updated on her dating life.
Agreed – I don’t think not opening doors on not date nights = complacency. That is just typical Reddit group think
Yes no contest if you wanna fuck everybody you come across then just stay single then you can fuck everybody you want simple as that
You guys are odd people to be charging eachother for Xmas dinner together.
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That's different and has nothing to do with the purchase of the house. That's a marriage contract which states which assets will be shared and which won't. That can negate the spouse getting an equal cut upon divorce, but it also depends on the nature of the divorce.
Are they both mutually dissolving the contract or did someone violate the terms of the contract (both marriage and prenup) rendering the prenuptial agreement void prior to the decision to divorce?
All depends on how the contract is written.
Ok, so wanting the princess dynamic doesn’t automatically make her a bad person. But the way she’s asking you for it is wrong. To me it sounds you don’t have open, or healthy communication dynamic with each other. And she finds it easier / less scary to tell you things over text than in person.
From what you’ve written, it seems like she’s been overthinking a mountain of scenarios alone (etc working herself up to think you’re cheating, which could be directly related to her feeling like you’re not making the same effort with her anymore). And the way you’ve made this sound is that this is the first time she’s addressing these issues. Has she brought up these concerns to you before, or tried to? And if so, have you tried to fix anything (seriously)?
Because it sounds like you’re also very conscious that you’re not making the same effort as you did at the start of your relationship. Now that’s entirely your choice and you don’t have to. But you also have to realise that if you made a lot of effort at the start, this is what she expected in the future when agreeing to continue the relationship with you. So you should never sell unreal expectations if you know they won’t / can’t continue (etc lots of fancy dates / paying for everything). Otherwise it could build resentment with your partner in the future when you “suddenly” stop because you’ve won them over.
The moral of the story, not paying for her nails is not why she’s asking to break up with you. It’s a superficial and silly reason that was perhaps the final “tipping point”. But overall she’s trying to tell you that there’s deeper reasons (a huge emotional disconnect due to built resentment). But is unable to communicate this in a healthy way and is instead coming across as childish. You need to really think of you want to make this work and make an effort to understand each other on deeper levels, or if fighting to stay is too much effort. Good luck and make the choice based on what you feel inside 🙂
What a dumbass tho. He couldve just lied and told her he fell out of love of her just before he has to go back and go married
Drinking is not an excuse for cheating, it’s a bandaid you use to cover up when you damage somebody’s trust, but it doesn’t actually heal anything. You could have left out the drinking part entirely and your actions would have been exactly the same. It’s also obvious you’re not a very mature or mindful person if you can let yourself go that bad at a holiday party. Let your partner go so they can find someone who a) is in control of their drinking and b) won’t break their trust in such a stupid way
Your bf seems a little naive. Her intentions were quite clear. I don't think you should blame him for that though. Doesn't seem like he did anything other than be naive.
Like the closet of Bender's apartment, lucky Fry
If husband isn't willing to do what he should
Holy shit, you quoted it and STILL misread it.
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That’s something I hadn’t thought of. I’m thinking I’ll leave it till school starts and see if she texts then. But mentally I’m just going to move on. I think I’m getting a little too hooked on someone I barely know lol. Though it is hard. Thank you for the advice!
300 odd comments that think you're a troll because of how insecure you're acting…
… but it's everyone else that's a clown or embarrassing themselves. Dude, we're all just watching this circus
I really don’t think that I’m being controlling. The biggest issue is the safety of my cats, which she’s being quite careless of. Sure, the water bowl can be moved but the issue for me is the logic. It makes no sense to me that she HAS to take her pills directly next to where the cats eat when I’ve legitimately asked her nicely to do the routine anywhere else in the house.
“Serial killer “ ah yes
Sorry if it was confusing! My sister asked to live with me in 2017, but I said no because I wanted to get an apartment for me and my boyfriend, so I helped her get her own apartment. We got our own place in 2020, a month before our wedding, and my SIL was already there because my MIL said it’s hard for her to be alone during the pandemic. My husband and I agreed that she would move out after the wedding, but she only left Aug 2022. By then I have already built so much resentment, and when I try to explain it to him, he keeps saying that I should move on since my SIL already left. This is where he told me about my own sister.
I don’t need to know anything more than the age gap and divorced. Save yourself the heartache and get out of this relationship.
Tell her you want her to role-playing some white trash from the trailer park.
If she, for some weird reason, thought you were a loser for not getting your first kiss as a teenager, then why would you want to be with her?
Your partner should like you for you and not care about stupid shit like that. Be with someone who makes you happy and doesn't make you hide apart of yourself.
These situations can be tricky to navigate bc it depends on the persons involved however…to generalize…sometimes females just want you to listen to them and provide non advice support/comfort (ie a hug)
Showing empathy is great! sometimes that’s all you need to do (speaking wise) and then maybe give her a hug or Netflix and binge or do something that’s not offering advice.
Not straight away but after you’ve offered physical comfort you could offer to make dinner/do something she normally does and let her have some time to herself to do something she likes doing to recharge/process what she said to you (sometimes just saying it out loud to someone makes it real to them and they just need time to process that also).
Being vulnerable is the ‘easiest’ way to earn trust and build bonds with someone.
It’s not as easy as it sounds and you wouldn’t do at the time when she is showing vulnerability (bc it’s not a competition) but at some point maybe express to her a time when you have felt the same/similar way and share those thoughts and feelings with her (ie how did it make you feel, what did you did to overcome it…etc)
it doesn’t have to be the same thing more about recognizing the feelings she is expressing to you and then providing an example of a time when you felt like that and how you ‘overcame’ it – you don’t even need to have overcome it, if you haven’t tell her, be honest.
It’s also about how & what you say & when you say it. You can offer advice but try not sound like that the solution/method you used/are proposing is what she should do (we are all different after all).
It sounds tho, despite your social awkwardness you are aware and willing to learn how to be ‘better’, which is GREAT!
I highly recommend seeing a therapist to work thru your ‘limitations’. There is nothing wrong (& so much more to gain) by seeking assistance in areas that are outside your current knowledge scope.
Tbh I wish I saw one earlier.
Self improvement never really stops and life likes to throw us curve balls…knowing & loving yourself is the key to knowing & loving others…enjoy the ride yolo
Thanks for your comment. How do i note the difference in the future? He seemed also confussed when i was hurt
You've only been diagnosed as not-weird, which is not the same as normal.
Don't try the reverse cupcake hoax. Just let this issue go by. Maybe something comes of this relationship, maybe not. Wait and see what develops.
Thank you!! This is exactly why I have the insecurities. I don’t feel like he’s “coming out” or “accepting himself” simply bc he I am the only guy he sees this way. Even as of yesterday he doesn’t find any other guy attractive but says he does to me only.
Idc if his family is homophobic and he says they aren’t just that it’s gonna come to a real shock to them. I don’t mind waiting but it’s the combination of things that worries me.
Bruh just bringing it up. Unfortunately you saw something now you have to address it. Tip towing around the subject and having thousands of thoughts going through your brain best bet is to just come out and say what you saw but you need to pay attention and listen to the way she speaks and acts because her actions will tell you everything you need to know.
I have probably been through a shit ton more and accomplished more than the average 30 year old
You only feel that you are experienced. In reality, because you have given birth to two kids before you were 19 and are living at home with your parents, you don't really have any true life experience. You have a nice comfy roof over your head, and your parents are right there with you in case things get rough. What you are is a teenager with a safe place to live, who got knocked up twice before you were even 19, and now can't figure out why the child you married has grown into such a man baby.
Unfortunately if you want continued 24/7 access then she pretty much has you over a barrel and she obviously knows it. Does she know you're at the point of leaving now? I know it's gonna hurt like he'll but consider your child witnessing really toxic behaviour over the coming months and years. It seems to me that a lesser amount of pure loving quality time has hot to be a better way to influence and educated your son.
Never feel shitty for looking after yourself. If you can’t even discuss finances without her trying to guilt you, that’s a red flag. Eventually your finances will be intertwined and she already comes across as feeling entitled to yours
I personally don't think that little things like that BECOME big things. Usually it's more like the little things are symptomatic of a bigger issue.
These little things seem to mostly be focused on 2 things. 1- you aren't satisfied with his level of cleanliness and 2- You don't think he is properly respecting your life and the efforts you have to put in.
I would just maybe talk about those bigger things and you can use the specifics as an example. I don't really think though that it's fair to criticize the way someone else lives if you don't live with them. So I would focus more on the 2nd issue.
Thank you! I will google those concepts. We've actually both looked a lot into attachment styles and talked about them. I'm anxious and she's avoidant, though a few times, she has tested as disorganized/fearful-avoidant. I agree that it is guilt-tripping and it has been constant.
I’m 36. Somebody my age dating somebody your age is super weird. People your age look likes babies to me. I think you’re better off without him.
Please don't adjust your perfectly healthy and normal body for this selfish man.
Because I love him and he needs the open relationship but I don’t need or want it on my side. Every relationship is different. He treats me well and cares for me dearly, it’s the attraction / sex part that’s missing
He thinks it's cool to rap about those things. He's showing you how he has garbage values. He's not the teddy bear he pretended to be. Anybody strongly against the values he's singing about, would refuse to sing those words. He writes it himself, he is not against it.
and the hardest thing is i feel like i am lying to him hes like my brother now and we have shared almost everything but i know i mean its obvious this is the only thing i cant tell him . he will be uncomfortable around me and make things awkward but i just want to get it off my chest i want to tell him so badly and him to forget it in a milisecond
Can I wait until he’s finished with his holiday to have a medically necessary abortion? No, no I can’t. I didn’t manipulate anything. It says from the beginning he is already in another country and that we have been on the phone.
Creative writing. My wild guess.
Why is he creepy?
it's all boys vs girls it seems
Apparently he is not in any kind of contract.
You having a stroke bro?
Yeah I saw that too. I had a hysterectomy basically between two of my husbands deployments. I don't think we had any wiggle room in my recovery before he was suppose to leave. I was told it would be six to eight weeks before intercourse to give my body time to heal. So you know what that man did. NOTHING, that man did not pressure me for sex, didn't ask me for a BJ, didn't try to play with my boobs or butt. That man, my husband waited until I was ready to have sex and even then I think it took the doctor telling him I was healed.
So a man who had been gone for like more than half a year, home only a year, to then be told they'll be gone again, this time in a extremely dangerous place and you'll be back at some point. Was not thinking about how he was going to get his dick wet before he left. Like find you a person like him. Not him, he's mine.
I got a ton of free condoms from Planned Parenthood. Kept them for anal. There are a number of possibilities for it.
Oh no.
I couldn’t be with someone who slept around with my friends. Granted, my friends are male and if my fiancé was bi I’d absolutely still be very upset enough to not date him for this sole reason. I find it very disgusting. Plus, I’d expect him to be completely honest with me rather than just omit that detail.
Your girlfriend pulled a fast one on you and will now turn around and say “it’s not a big deal, I’m with you now”. This is unacceptable AND you didn’t find out from HER, you found out from the dudes she banged that are supposedly your “friends” now.
This is seriously gross and I’d cut this relationship off yesterday. ?