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We are enforcing the two rules listed above by making all titles start with ages/genders in the following format:
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This is a nice thing you want to do for your boyfriend! From the sound of it, he is unappreciated and his boundaries are either not in place or overrun. You're probably right in that things will only continue the way they are now, they may even get a lot worse before he sees that too though. If he's been treated like this his whole life this is his normal; you can help him by making him see that it's not and hopefully get his sense of self to a better place. I don't really have advice or a way to go, but it may help if he talks this over with friends or someone else outside of the family. I wish you both the very best!
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Reddit is not going to like this but I dated someone who was slightly older when I was 22. The guy claimed to have been “experienced”. Yeah he didn’t know how to put on a condom didn’t have rhythm and didn’t understand basic sexual anatomy. I felt a bit lied to and that relationship went south really quick because he was a very insecure person that felt the need to lie because they had zero life outside of me (which I didn’t know about). Idk it’s up to you. I personally would rather date someone that’s had at least 3 or more experiences because bad sex can be a massive deal breaker. Plus he’s a liar.
Thank you. That was very insightful. I think we definitely have communication issues and different communication styles. I did ask him to drive with me but I didn't tell him it was important to me because I didn't want to influence his decision which I realise now was ridiculous.
We are speaking about the future and are going to take some time apart to work on ourselves before trying to reconnect and work on things together.
I don’t think you should leave him. If he wanted her he would be with her. The connections they have will reduce over time. He is in love with you. Just make sure you keep reminding him why that is. You need to show confidence in your relationship and trust in him. That will make you more powerful. If you start questioning him you will create problems and push him away.
Also remember that you only have a baby for one year. Then you have a toddler, a child, a teen and then an adult. If your heart isn’t in it to raise and guide a whole life, you should listen.
Yes, you're correct. But my goal is not to be correct, my goal is prospective, remove the ego, accepting responsibility. He's responsible for his feelings. His feelings required a break. What does that mean or look like? It's about communication, understanding one's thoughts and behaviors and how it affects you and subsequently your partner. I'm big on communicating. I'm big on taking responsibility and seeking understanding, therefore introspection. I like to examine both sides of the coin and the groves in order to make a decision and accept responsibility. That's all I'm saying.
Basically, a decision was made by two inexperienced young ppl, that didn't pan out the way they expected, which has the potential of ruining what seemed to be a good relationship. However, it would seem that they didn't communicate the what ifs and as someone who has the exhausting personality of over communicating, I was focusing on Op because he's the one with the issue and caused the domino effect.
To me, it seems that the quiet part that's not being said is, as far as I've read, is he watched her cheat on him and he's traumatized by it. Most ppl are putting the blame on her and I don't feel it's fair especially since she aske him if he's sure.
Might have understood him if he was saving money for a mortgage because that’s getting more and more difficult, but he sounds like he’s just leeching and wants to act like a teenager.
I would guess that his inability to get you pregnant played a part in his change of feelings. Men like that want you to be permanently anchored to them, even if they don't want to raise a child, they know that no matter what, you will be in their lives, needing something from them, forever.
the purpose of him stopping by was to tell us that our tv was too loud, which we respected and turned it down. and when confronted about the loud noises that have been happening since we moved in, he got very defensive. unfortunately the man that stopped by owns his condo, and we are only renting ours so our “landlord” can’t really do much so we are just confused on what to do.
the purpose of him stopping by was to tell us that our tv was too loud, which we respected and turned it down. and when confronted about the loud noises that have been happening since we moved in, he got very defensive. unfortunately the man that stopped by owns his condo, and we are only renting ours so our “landlord” can’t really do much so we are just confused on what to do.
Lol she didn't mentionned she wanted to see someone else… a break is a break up so yes technically one of them could see someone else but not sure that's the point here.
You can defenitely ask him to see you more like a women, than a friend. You can also work a little bit on being more feminine. You can be strong and whatever on top of being submissive to your man.
You do not have to hide yourself to change the dynamic a little and unlike what modern feminism teaches women, there is absolutely nothing wrong with being submissive in a healthy relationship, at all. In fact, it will benefit the relationship greatly
If you act like a guy, he will treat you like one. Its that simple.
Telling my parents what I thought of them and their parenting felt AMAZING and frankly I wish I could have another go at it and tear into them even better now that I am a parent myself. However, I went strict NC with them immediately after those conversations and it's now been over a decade. Best decisions I've ever made. Bear in mind, my parents were horribly abusive and neglectful literally my entire life. Like, my first assualt (smack ?) was written down in my baby book (Baby's Firsts) levels of bad, I was 9 months old.
I would say it's worth telling them how you feel. If you intend on keeping them in your life though, you will need to be pretty gentle about it as that generation and above are sensitive as heck. Best approach might be to write letters and workshop them for a bit and talk it through with your therapist.
Hmmm…maybe you should check into some of the products that claim to eliminate smoker's breath? Also, maybe it's actually residual from your clothing. Maybe run everything through the washer with one of those super odor eliminator detergents? Sane with your shoes? What about your car? Maybe have that seriously detailed inside (although, I've heard it's nearly impossible to get the cigarette smell out of cars).
Piss off. You're playing stupid. You're well aware that there are significant biological differences between trans and cis women which WILL affect attraction in the majority of the population. You don't get to decide if someone's sexual preferences are ok. That was the cornerstone of the entire fight for LGBT rights. This kind of insanity is going to bite the trans community in the ass so freaking hard, including legislatively. There's so many fake reasons for the right to stir up trans panic, you'd think you wouldn't be stupid enough to give them real ones. You're losing the culture war miserably and you wanna pull shit like this?
I always know someone's never partied when they say things like this. Drunk, high, in another dimension on DMT, pumped off of coke, doesn't matter. Typing/texting is habitual and autocorrect solves an enormous amount of problems. Hell I can go outside right now and get blitzed, then come back and recite poetry over text if you want.
Ahh, I understand completely. Honestly, from your POV that would hurt me so kudos to you being able to take that and have a mature conversation about it. I also understand his POV, and if I were you I would be thankful that he communicated clearly what he wants out of this relationship.
I say try changing your perspective. Yes, you had a fast metabolism, but were you healthy? Does the food you eat make you feel tired and sluggish? Sugar rush and then crash? Your diet affects your daily life, hydration levels, nutrition, all of that affects you daily and long term. I think you should try to look at it in terms of health and longevity. We get around 80 short years on this earth if we are lucky, don't you want to make the most of it? Do you want to live a long, happy, healthy life full of adventures with your partner? Eventually your choices will catch up with you far beyond weight and beauty.
Both of you appear to have fertility issues. OP, I've been happily married for 47 years with no children. This is also an option for you and your wife.
Sorry to say but you never will be. I would have let the pair of them go on a girlie holiday and packed my shit up and left while they were away.
Your gf is either so stunted emotionally that she hasn’t a clue what she’s done or she actually doesn’t think of you romantically any more but you’re just someone useful to have around.
that’s so fucking cruel and sadistic wtf.. reading this shit made me mad on your behalf. it sounds like the girl got jealous that you’re another girl in the group and wanted to purposefully embarrass you. the fact that his friends were all pointing and laughing at you and he did nothing but join it. and when you left, he never apologized or even checked up on you and even was yelling at you with his friends is so fucked up. and is now making you apologize to him for you “embarrassing him to his friends”?? wtf?? him and all his friends are a bunch of assholes. the fact that they doing all of this at they grown ages is beyond me.
pack his shit and end the relationship with this guy. him and his friends don’t respect you. i’m so sorry this has happened to you OP, you deserve so much better.
What advice do you even need? Whether you should do it? I don't think there's any harm but it just sounds extremely petty and won't really help uou move to a healthier space after this relationship. I doubt the plan would work too. After a couple of rounds in her wash, it would smell like her again and then you'd have just wasted your time.
You are missing the point. The “body count” people and you are the same, you are just hyper fixated on something slightly different, it’s the same demand for possession of other peoples sexuality.
There are a lot of things that are normal in much of the world but not normal in the US.
They dispose of TP this way because they don't have the infrastructure the US has. There is absolutely no reason to do this in the US unless there are septic issues.
Poop and pee are very different than menstrual products. One can't be flushed and only happens for a short time, the other happens multiple times/day or daily and can cause serious health issues. Not the same at all and again, totally unnecessary. Our plumbing and processing is made to handle TP.
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This is a nice thing you want to do for your boyfriend! From the sound of it, he is unappreciated and his boundaries are either not in place or overrun. You're probably right in that things will only continue the way they are now, they may even get a lot worse before he sees that too though. If he's been treated like this his whole life this is his normal; you can help him by making him see that it's not and hopefully get his sense of self to a better place. I don't really have advice or a way to go, but it may help if he talks this over with friends or someone else outside of the family. I wish you both the very best!
Would you rather this happen or worry about this happening for the rest of your life?
Hello /u/ThrowRA4luv,
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Yes, all men should know the meaning of “no” and “stop” before they ever have sex in my opinion.
Reddit is not going to like this but I dated someone who was slightly older when I was 22. The guy claimed to have been “experienced”. Yeah he didn’t know how to put on a condom didn’t have rhythm and didn’t understand basic sexual anatomy. I felt a bit lied to and that relationship went south really quick because he was a very insecure person that felt the need to lie because they had zero life outside of me (which I didn’t know about). Idk it’s up to you. I personally would rather date someone that’s had at least 3 or more experiences because bad sex can be a massive deal breaker. Plus he’s a liar.
Thank you. That was very insightful. I think we definitely have communication issues and different communication styles. I did ask him to drive with me but I didn't tell him it was important to me because I didn't want to influence his decision which I realise now was ridiculous.
We are speaking about the future and are going to take some time apart to work on ourselves before trying to reconnect and work on things together.
I don’t think you should leave him. If he wanted her he would be with her. The connections they have will reduce over time. He is in love with you. Just make sure you keep reminding him why that is. You need to show confidence in your relationship and trust in him. That will make you more powerful. If you start questioning him you will create problems and push him away.
Also remember that you only have a baby for one year. Then you have a toddler, a child, a teen and then an adult. If your heart isn’t in it to raise and guide a whole life, you should listen.
Yes, you're correct. But my goal is not to be correct, my goal is prospective, remove the ego, accepting responsibility. He's responsible for his feelings. His feelings required a break. What does that mean or look like? It's about communication, understanding one's thoughts and behaviors and how it affects you and subsequently your partner. I'm big on communicating. I'm big on taking responsibility and seeking understanding, therefore introspection. I like to examine both sides of the coin and the groves in order to make a decision and accept responsibility. That's all I'm saying.
Basically, a decision was made by two inexperienced young ppl, that didn't pan out the way they expected, which has the potential of ruining what seemed to be a good relationship. However, it would seem that they didn't communicate the what ifs and as someone who has the exhausting personality of over communicating, I was focusing on Op because he's the one with the issue and caused the domino effect.
To me, it seems that the quiet part that's not being said is, as far as I've read, is he watched her cheat on him and he's traumatized by it. Most ppl are putting the blame on her and I don't feel it's fair especially since she aske him if he's sure.
You have a point that o wasn't see completely. Thank you for your words
Might have understood him if he was saving money for a mortgage because that’s getting more and more difficult, but he sounds like he’s just leeching and wants to act like a teenager.
I would guess that his inability to get you pregnant played a part in his change of feelings. Men like that want you to be permanently anchored to them, even if they don't want to raise a child, they know that no matter what, you will be in their lives, needing something from them, forever.
Run, girl.
3 in real life and idk how many in porn
the purpose of him stopping by was to tell us that our tv was too loud, which we respected and turned it down. and when confronted about the loud noises that have been happening since we moved in, he got very defensive. unfortunately the man that stopped by owns his condo, and we are only renting ours so our “landlord” can’t really do much so we are just confused on what to do.
the purpose of him stopping by was to tell us that our tv was too loud, which we respected and turned it down. and when confronted about the loud noises that have been happening since we moved in, he got very defensive. unfortunately the man that stopped by owns his condo, and we are only renting ours so our “landlord” can’t really do much so we are just confused on what to do.
Lol she didn't mentionned she wanted to see someone else… a break is a break up so yes technically one of them could see someone else but not sure that's the point here.
You can defenitely ask him to see you more like a women, than a friend. You can also work a little bit on being more feminine. You can be strong and whatever on top of being submissive to your man.
You do not have to hide yourself to change the dynamic a little and unlike what modern feminism teaches women, there is absolutely nothing wrong with being submissive in a healthy relationship, at all. In fact, it will benefit the relationship greatly
If you act like a guy, he will treat you like one. Its that simple.
Telling my parents what I thought of them and their parenting felt AMAZING and frankly I wish I could have another go at it and tear into them even better now that I am a parent myself. However, I went strict NC with them immediately after those conversations and it's now been over a decade. Best decisions I've ever made. Bear in mind, my parents were horribly abusive and neglectful literally my entire life. Like, my first assualt (smack ?) was written down in my baby book (Baby's Firsts) levels of bad, I was 9 months old.
I would say it's worth telling them how you feel. If you intend on keeping them in your life though, you will need to be pretty gentle about it as that generation and above are sensitive as heck. Best approach might be to write letters and workshop them for a bit and talk it through with your therapist.
Good luck.
Go to the dentist. You have cigarette tar and stuff all gunked up in your shit.
Get a cleaning
Hmmm…maybe you should check into some of the products that claim to eliminate smoker's breath? Also, maybe it's actually residual from your clothing. Maybe run everything through the washer with one of those super odor eliminator detergents? Sane with your shoes? What about your car? Maybe have that seriously detailed inside (although, I've heard it's nearly impossible to get the cigarette smell out of cars).
Or they could die before he even has children that's the thing about life it's unpredictable
No it shouldn’t have I been sexually assaulted I’m a cis woman and need it
Piss off. You're playing stupid. You're well aware that there are significant biological differences between trans and cis women which WILL affect attraction in the majority of the population. You don't get to decide if someone's sexual preferences are ok. That was the cornerstone of the entire fight for LGBT rights. This kind of insanity is going to bite the trans community in the ass so freaking hard, including legislatively. There's so many fake reasons for the right to stir up trans panic, you'd think you wouldn't be stupid enough to give them real ones. You're losing the culture war miserably and you wanna pull shit like this?
I always know someone's never partied when they say things like this. Drunk, high, in another dimension on DMT, pumped off of coke, doesn't matter. Typing/texting is habitual and autocorrect solves an enormous amount of problems. Hell I can go outside right now and get blitzed, then come back and recite poetry over text if you want.
Send her the vid/pic then ghost. Simple, just not easy. Good you found out before, not after.
Man, this is awfull to hear. You are too good for her.
When I was young I had a bf like that.
I swear to God you will find someone better.
I am seeking help. Thank you for your advice.
Ahh, I understand completely. Honestly, from your POV that would hurt me so kudos to you being able to take that and have a mature conversation about it. I also understand his POV, and if I were you I would be thankful that he communicated clearly what he wants out of this relationship.
I say try changing your perspective. Yes, you had a fast metabolism, but were you healthy? Does the food you eat make you feel tired and sluggish? Sugar rush and then crash? Your diet affects your daily life, hydration levels, nutrition, all of that affects you daily and long term. I think you should try to look at it in terms of health and longevity. We get around 80 short years on this earth if we are lucky, don't you want to make the most of it? Do you want to live a long, happy, healthy life full of adventures with your partner? Eventually your choices will catch up with you far beyond weight and beauty.
Fair point, I should've said one he needs to work through if he wishes to continue in the relationship
Well said!!! ❤️
No
Both of you appear to have fertility issues. OP, I've been happily married for 47 years with no children. This is also an option for you and your wife.
Bruh lmao
Dolt
You’re not your girlfriends number o n priority.
Sorry to say but you never will be. I would have let the pair of them go on a girlie holiday and packed my shit up and left while they were away.
Your gf is either so stunted emotionally that she hasn’t a clue what she’s done or she actually doesn’t think of you romantically any more but you’re just someone useful to have around.
How is it equally your moment? You growing a baby in your testicles and gonna give birth to it somehow?
Can't say I'd recommend telling him ever, but you seem to already be pretty far in the deep end of things I wouldn't recommend.
Bruh this is barely short story length. Your attention span is fried.
Awesome, thank you so much!!
that’s so fucking cruel and sadistic wtf.. reading this shit made me mad on your behalf. it sounds like the girl got jealous that you’re another girl in the group and wanted to purposefully embarrass you. the fact that his friends were all pointing and laughing at you and he did nothing but join it. and when you left, he never apologized or even checked up on you and even was yelling at you with his friends is so fucked up. and is now making you apologize to him for you “embarrassing him to his friends”?? wtf?? him and all his friends are a bunch of assholes. the fact that they doing all of this at they grown ages is beyond me.
pack his shit and end the relationship with this guy. him and his friends don’t respect you. i’m so sorry this has happened to you OP, you deserve so much better.
It isn’t that easy because we have a collaboration going.
It isn’t that easy because we have a collaboration going.
I am trying to take this serious but it reminds me of Ben stiller replacing the cat in meet the parents.
What advice do you even need? Whether you should do it? I don't think there's any harm but it just sounds extremely petty and won't really help uou move to a healthier space after this relationship. I doubt the plan would work too. After a couple of rounds in her wash, it would smell like her again and then you'd have just wasted your time.
You are missing the point. The “body count” people and you are the same, you are just hyper fixated on something slightly different, it’s the same demand for possession of other peoples sexuality.
I thought he proposed when she was 20?
Dump her an maybe suggest she see an addiction counsellor.
There are a lot of things that are normal in much of the world but not normal in the US.
They dispose of TP this way because they don't have the infrastructure the US has. There is absolutely no reason to do this in the US unless there are septic issues.
Poop and pee are very different than menstrual products. One can't be flushed and only happens for a short time, the other happens multiple times/day or daily and can cause serious health issues. Not the same at all and again, totally unnecessary. Our plumbing and processing is made to handle TP.