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? ? ? ? ? ? ?, 21 y.o.
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However, after the engagement and especially since our marriage she has seemingly flipped 180 degrees.
It’s possible that she thinks that now that she has you in the bag, she doesn’t have to pretend anymore. Anyway, you now see who she really is and what her real thoughts are towards your son. As the saying goes, when someone shows you who they really are, believe them.
I broke off the conversation by saying I would never be with someone who wishes my son didn't exist.
Now that she knows this about you, she may change her attitude a little bit because she may sense that the security she has in this relationship may be changing. The problem is at this point, it’s difficult to know whether she’s changing because she genuinely wants to change or because she want’s to ensure that you’ll stick around.
Either way, I would worry how she’s be treating your kid when she has to spend more time with him. She may start developing resentment towards your son, if she hasn’t already and may make it difficult to enjoy his time with you. Over time, he may come to associate with you all the bad experiences that she created for him.
Whatever you do, please resolve this fully even before considering having child(ren) with her. That would make things significantly more complicated.
No but every troll posts from a new account or an old one with all their previous posts deleted.
It could be a reflection of the feeling of love, yes.
No, no it’s not.
The problem isn’t about him looking a certain way, but how you look at the situation. Bodies change as we get older. Will you expect him to have surgery when he gets wrinkled and droopy? Is him no longer being buff the issue, or no longer being as active? Is it a lifestyle change or a change in appearance that bothers you more? If it’s all about looks…then yeah, incredibly shallow.
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This is a business trip. Your entire trip is a 2023 tax exemption as business purpose expense. I don’t wanna mansplain taxes, but if you’re not expensing your trips, you need a tax dude.
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Never will it be “soon”
Do you love your friend or not? Either you love her, and then you‘ll be happy for her for at least being financially secure after losing her mother at such a young age.
Or you’re jealous of something she would certainly not have chosen if she had had a choice. Then you are a bad friend. Put distance between you.
Go practise kindness. Volunteer with homeless people to learn to appreciate what you have, and find an extra kind thing to do every day. If you train your heart to be kind, there’s no room for jealousy.
Looks like he's been faithful to you but has a crush on your friend. This is natural when you're around people you get on with, doesn't mean there's any threat to your relationship. Actually sounds like he's just really happy with his life as it currently is to be honest.
Probably worth a discussion with him about it so he can recognise it's a crush but from what you've quoted, I think he's in a good place & not wanting to change any relationship dynamic at all.
You do need to tell him that you don't respect his privacy & read his journal. He deserves to know that his private thoughts aren't private anymore & then he can decide if you're still the person he thought you were. Of course, if you'd rather hide that info to avoid losing his respect or to be able to manipulate the situation, that's your decision even if it is a shitty one.
My sister had a joint fb account with her husband for a while and I was like
Y'all alright?
Why would you want to be a guy who thinks a a rape victim is at fault? That's some extremist thinking. This dude is toxic and will only become more dangerous over time.
How worse can it get?
You’d be surprised how many really good professional singers will occasionally be off key, usually a little flat. Some use pitch correct, some use delay or other means to correct the issue. In fact, if you were to hear most singers singing “dry” almost all of them would have that problem.
The real issue to me seems to be how he’s going about living his dream. Doing covers in a studio does little to advance a career. He should be with a band doing original material (hopefully he writes). He should put an ad in local music magazine and see if he can find a band or he can put one together. Go to open mic nights or even karaoke (I know singers that got found doing karaoke).
He’s right at the cusp of where he has a shot at big time or settles for something less than being a professional singer. I’m going to use myself as an example. I had similar problems to him. Played in bands, got married and hung it up. In my late 40’s I got the itch again which was encouraged by my wife and I started a Tribute Band. At one point we were the best in the world at it, played in theaters and festivals in front of thousands.
If you’re a musician, it’s a part of you, even if it’s something you do on the weekends. So encourage him but there will be a day when realizes he probably isn’t going to be a star. Only 1% of musicians actually make a living at it
Nope you are wrong. This is the classic sign of someone who is about to become more abusive. The way he treated her on this date was already abusive.
Read about Domestic Violence. This guy is so controlling and jealous, he's on the verge of it already.
Oh but you know she's not gonna leave any woman that has this little respect for themselves to allow this for so long and then having her husbands bf move in…
Yeah she's not going anywhere. Gonna pop in earphones and clean the kitchen like a good little wife while her hubby and the bf “work out”
Jesus people really are just showing me the world is going down the drain with what they allow. How is this normal?
Why expect it's about you? He broke up with you and that was about 5 months ago..
Only you can decide that.
It would not be acceptable for me or my partner to go to a “clothing optional “ anything without each other – period. That’s my line. Not ok. So the fact she went to a clothing optional place nude would be just as bad as fucking someone imo! But I would also make my boundaries known- they are known- and if he chose to still go and get naked it would be a big nope for me.
It will get better , it’s been a month since my ex & I don’t feel any better but day by day I’m getting there
Start emailing him, CCing the manager whenever he starts pulling something like that
You mentioned in one comment if you should try therapy first for the sake of the kids. From my experience(my parents divorced), kids don’t need married parents and it is even counterproductive for them if their parents are unhappy. If your child would be in the same situation as you are, would you want them to stay in an unhealthy relationship or divorce and find happiness on your own? Just be an example for them. I don’t believe you would be an good example by staying in this relationship but it is your choice.
Also your current husband can still be their dad even if you’re divorced. If he was a good dad before, he still will be. If he was a bad dad before, that will also stay.
My fiancé was with a woman for ten years before me who was either ace or gray ace. Most of that relationship’s issues don’t actually sound pertinent to you — because you don’t sound like you’re secretly jealous while telling him to sleep with other people — but I will say, don’t try to keep him if it’s too big a hurdle for him. If he wants sex with you, getting his rocks off elsewhere won’t be satisfying. While a sexual person and an ace person in a sexless relationship can work, you’re both still pretty young and it would likely be in everyone’s best interest to move on from the relationship and each of you finding partners you’re more compatible with. He may want to try a sexless relationship, of course; but don’t hold it against each other if one of you can’t hack it.
bro don’t respond at all she will lead you onto a heartbreak, cut it off now before it gets worse dude. If she couldn’t meet you on Sunday cause of work, then ended up not going to work at all. Then tells you to make plans on Monday for her just to say it’s actually her father’s birthday to avoid you. Don’t waste YOUR time wanting to hangout with someone who doesn’t want to spend their time with you.
I guess as long as I'm giving advice I would have recommended that you get all these issues worked out prior to getting engaged let alone to getting married. It may sound cliche but being open and honest with each other is going to lead to the most successful results in marriage or at least that's been my experience.