42 thoughts on “° , ???? ?????? ° live webcams for YOU!”
Yeah the internal misogyny is strong here… OP views herself as a provider of (sexual) favours and a provider an object to be “won over”. A disaster of disillusionment waiting to happen.
Sure, or he’s just as shy as you are. Men and women are both humans, and both get nervous. Especially if he thinks you aren’t interested.
See the issue? You don’t want to ask him out because you don’t think he’s interested, not because you don’t want to. Doesn’t it stand to reason that he may want to, but doesn’t think you’re interested? I mean, I can’t force you to do anything, but I figured if you were interested enough to make a Reddit post about it you might be interested enough to ask him out.
Plus, asking once isn’t pushing it. If he said no and you kept asking that would be pushing. Anyways, whatever you decide, I hope it goes well for you. Have a good day.
Just another perspective. I have no idea how y'all date people for months without even being exclusive. My first criteria in a potential SO is that they are into me specifically. Things may not work out but you ask someone special out, not a bunch and see if anyone sticks.
You could have a talk with her about taking it slow. But if you are so put off by someone potentially forming since genuine emotion about you after months I don't think you're the right fit for her.
What happens when you can’t lift anything or move much because of possibly tearing your stitches? And what happens if you tear your stitches and your boyfriend can’t be bothered to take you back into the hospital? Going back to him when he already didn’t help anything the first time is just going to cause you physical harm! Ask the nurses for help! They have information on resources that could help you!
My advice would be to learn how to drive, and work toward getting a car. The independence and freedom you obtain from this will last you a lifetime.
Another thing is that if you can afford your own place then you will not have to move again. Look into learning a trade, or attending classes. Find a job with good opportunities for advancement. If you can take on a second job to set aside money for a car or your future.
You are so young and have a whole future to plan for. Think about what you want your future to look like and make it happen. I hope it includes a beautiful permanent home that you can take a lot of pride in and enjoy forever. Good Luck.
Your post was removed for the following reason(s):
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And before having a conversation with him, if there is a chance maybe try to check his devices. We are waiting for your update and best of luck to you.
If he masturbate often this all might be quite easy to explain
Some guys who masturbate often develop habits from masturbating and it condition their body to come more easily from these habits rather than having sex
Also if he masturbate a lot, it also explains why he doesn't “shoot” that much
If it affects your sex life with him, maybe you should talk to him about it and try to find a solution, maybe he's not that much into penetration and would enjoy other things more
Shhhh this isnt your relationship, just give destructive advice and laugh. /s
Seriously though, this guy might be cheating, he might not be. If wife gets a PI and he wasnt cheating, she is now the one with a secret worth leaving over and he has all the justification he would need. If my wife hired a PI to investigate me Id definitely be peacing out of that relationship pronto, trust is alreafy gone what is there to salvage?
I wasn't giving you life advice, I was saying don't bring a kid into a situation where you are involved in such activities. And it is relevant because it's an entire dynamic on top of your relationship that you're seeking advice on. This isn't a moral judgment, this is a kids don't do well in those lifestyles and I have known lots of people who are or were sex workers and very few were able to keep their lifes separated enough to maintain custody of their kids while doing it.
Most times these illnesses progress with age. You are young and not that invested. You will become more invested and more worn down with time. Choose you. Just let go and move on.
Around new years she kept trying to elicit sympathy from me for her breaking up with me. I told her she was the one who did and to stop trying to cry on my shoulder and to take ownership of her choices.
I agree on the email, but things were still pretty raw then.
I know she can post whatever she wants. I’d just prefer she not do it in front of an audience of 80k people when a few of them may have an interest in me.
Perhaps I didn’t make it clear in my original post, but I didn’t go searching for her initially. I was curious if anyone had posted me there. I was honestly surprised to see she had replied. Then it annoyed the fuck out of me to see her butthurt tone in her initial comment.
Yeah, I’m too old to pay attention to this shit, and she’s too old to be pulling this shit. I’ve long since accepted her choice on us. I’d like it if she would.
In the UK any pornographic image still has to be of 18+ people. If a 17 year old took a nude selfie, they would be guilty of producing CP even if they didn't send it to anyone. If they did send it anywhere, then they are a producer and distributor of CP. That's the sort of thing that destroys lives
Your girlfriend needs to control herself. Yeah she has BPD and whatever else but that does not mean that she should be allowed to control who your therapist. What she is doing is manipulative whether she realizes or not. She needs to work through her own shit because frankly it shouldn’t affect you. You’ll never make progress when she’s clearly a huge source of anxiety. Her behaviour is not OK and no amount of trauma is ever going to make it ok. She’s not ready for a relationship.
I’m not going to break up with my bf because we have a great relationship. I’m trying to find solutions on how to get comfortable since it seems like most people think I’m unreasonable
1) They dragged her into it by framing her, that wasn't her meddling. 2) They ruined their own lives. 3) (And this may be the most stupid, but idgaf, imma say it) depending on the Android that is simply NOT TRUE. Hell, Samsung S21 series was the start of being WAY better with cameras than the iPhone 12 and 13 series, and it hasn't let up. Source: I sold phones during the pandemic and I'm a tech nerd.
All this to say, she didn't lose all her friends. She cleaned house to make room for better people.
I’ve had these specific dreams of working at a huge hospital Barnes Jewish hospital and working with their cardio program since I can remember. As a young girl even. For me, this is everything. I just can’t imagine him wanting to dump me now over the future which is so far away
Re-read that whole comment. Everything in that applies to your wife, even if she’s a doctor, no, especially because she’s a doctor! Being a stay at home mom WILL hurt her career in the long term and reduce her overall earning power. Having a kid in the first place already did that. I’m not saying it’s a sacrifice she doesn’t want to make, she very well could, but it’s important for you to understand the impact of these decisions on her.
If you really want her to be a SAHM approach it from the angle of “ I understand this is a big sacrifice that you’re making for our family, what can I do to make it worth it for you?” Then actually discuss how this will affect her career, what the expectations are on both ends, and what options she has in the future. Women in cishet relationships tend to do a significant amount of emotional and domestic labor and this work is uncompensated and widely taken advantage of by their spouses. Be aware of these issues and be proactive! Have regular open dialogue about the dynamic. Be willing to negotiate and make changes so that everyone is happy. Ensure this labor imbalance doesn’t happen in your relationship and maybe she will want to continue making your life this easy and happy.
I feel like this will eat at you continuously. It might be wise to reconsider. I’ve had a career where I traced internationally extensively, and the people I was with always seemed on edge. In the end, I had to settle down for things to work.
OK, here is the idea: you do this as in a 28 day “him-time”. Than you don't see each other for a week, and have a 28 day “her-time”. You define before what you want included in this.
Agreed. You won’t progress as a couple if you don’t have difficult conversations. His actions were disrespectful and crossed your boundaries otherwise you wouldn’t be upset and asking advice from strangers. So only you can accept How people treat you therefore “ teach” them how to treat you. So have that uncomfortable conversation, we can’t do it for you.
Yeah the out-loud wistful reminiscing about good dick delivered like a bad line from a 2000s comedy sounds like pure fantasy, but there’s also the tactic of twisting a story to leave out the obnoxious shit you did that would inspire someone else to say some heinous shit motivated by hurt spite
Yeah the internal misogyny is strong here… OP views herself as a provider of (sexual) favours and a provider an object to be “won over”. A disaster of disillusionment waiting to happen.
There's more to it but you're probably right
Sure, or he’s just as shy as you are. Men and women are both humans, and both get nervous. Especially if he thinks you aren’t interested.
See the issue? You don’t want to ask him out because you don’t think he’s interested, not because you don’t want to. Doesn’t it stand to reason that he may want to, but doesn’t think you’re interested? I mean, I can’t force you to do anything, but I figured if you were interested enough to make a Reddit post about it you might be interested enough to ask him out.
Plus, asking once isn’t pushing it. If he said no and you kept asking that would be pushing. Anyways, whatever you decide, I hope it goes well for you. Have a good day.
Just another perspective. I have no idea how y'all date people for months without even being exclusive. My first criteria in a potential SO is that they are into me specifically. Things may not work out but you ask someone special out, not a bunch and see if anyone sticks.
You could have a talk with her about taking it slow. But if you are so put off by someone potentially forming since genuine emotion about you after months I don't think you're the right fit for her.
What happens when you can’t lift anything or move much because of possibly tearing your stitches? And what happens if you tear your stitches and your boyfriend can’t be bothered to take you back into the hospital? Going back to him when he already didn’t help anything the first time is just going to cause you physical harm! Ask the nurses for help! They have information on resources that could help you!
My advice would be to learn how to drive, and work toward getting a car. The independence and freedom you obtain from this will last you a lifetime.
Another thing is that if you can afford your own place then you will not have to move again. Look into learning a trade, or attending classes. Find a job with good opportunities for advancement. If you can take on a second job to set aside money for a car or your future.
You are so young and have a whole future to plan for. Think about what you want your future to look like and make it happen. I hope it includes a beautiful permanent home that you can take a lot of pride in and enjoy forever. Good Luck.
Hello /u/Heavy-Reflection-445,
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And before having a conversation with him, if there is a chance maybe try to check his devices. We are waiting for your update and best of luck to you.
If he masturbate often this all might be quite easy to explain
Some guys who masturbate often develop habits from masturbating and it condition their body to come more easily from these habits rather than having sex
Also if he masturbate a lot, it also explains why he doesn't “shoot” that much
If it affects your sex life with him, maybe you should talk to him about it and try to find a solution, maybe he's not that much into penetration and would enjoy other things more
She didn’t get it from a toilet seat.
Just break up with her. And don’t kiss her if it’s in her mouth ?
Further contact just encourages this guy. If you are really his friend, you'll cut him loose so he'll focus on other women.
This has already gone on too long. You allowed him to waste his time.
You've been hit on since you were 14yo. You know better.
All of the comments attacking your bf sound mighty white ugh. Nice to not be attacked for existing
NEVER. Your career and education should always come first.
She get a background check on you without your consent. Let her do that and let her go.
Yes.
Hunny, I get, why you have hell to pay right now.
You missed out on the important part.
ASK her, what makes her feel jealous.
I bet she feels you sleep cuddle with that other woman.
Where and that it makes you feel way more restful than cuddling with HER.
Hahahaahahaha…. Brother, you’re f’d.
Shhhh this isnt your relationship, just give destructive advice and laugh. /s
Seriously though, this guy might be cheating, he might not be. If wife gets a PI and he wasnt cheating, she is now the one with a secret worth leaving over and he has all the justification he would need. If my wife hired a PI to investigate me Id definitely be peacing out of that relationship pronto, trust is alreafy gone what is there to salvage?
Thanks for actually looking at the facts and not jumping to labelling me a misogynist with no context lol
I wasn't giving you life advice, I was saying don't bring a kid into a situation where you are involved in such activities. And it is relevant because it's an entire dynamic on top of your relationship that you're seeking advice on. This isn't a moral judgment, this is a kids don't do well in those lifestyles and I have known lots of people who are or were sex workers and very few were able to keep their lifes separated enough to maintain custody of their kids while doing it.
He sounds so tedious. Find someone else
I wouldn't say so much of a freight train as a nuclear missile.
Being sexually assaulted fucking sucks no matter what!
Most times these illnesses progress with age. You are young and not that invested. You will become more invested and more worn down with time. Choose you. Just let go and move on.
Sorry you're going through this man
I have a new favorite phrase now.
Around new years she kept trying to elicit sympathy from me for her breaking up with me. I told her she was the one who did and to stop trying to cry on my shoulder and to take ownership of her choices.
I agree on the email, but things were still pretty raw then.
I know she can post whatever she wants. I’d just prefer she not do it in front of an audience of 80k people when a few of them may have an interest in me.
Perhaps I didn’t make it clear in my original post, but I didn’t go searching for her initially. I was curious if anyone had posted me there. I was honestly surprised to see she had replied. Then it annoyed the fuck out of me to see her butthurt tone in her initial comment.
Yeah, I’m too old to pay attention to this shit, and she’s too old to be pulling this shit. I’ve long since accepted her choice on us. I’d like it if she would.
Just tell her you don’t want sex until she’s washed her genitals. Poor hygiene isn’t ok.
In the UK any pornographic image still has to be of 18+ people. If a 17 year old took a nude selfie, they would be guilty of producing CP even if they didn't send it to anyone. If they did send it anywhere, then they are a producer and distributor of CP. That's the sort of thing that destroys lives
Your girlfriend needs to control herself. Yeah she has BPD and whatever else but that does not mean that she should be allowed to control who your therapist. What she is doing is manipulative whether she realizes or not. She needs to work through her own shit because frankly it shouldn’t affect you. You’ll never make progress when she’s clearly a huge source of anxiety. Her behaviour is not OK and no amount of trauma is ever going to make it ok. She’s not ready for a relationship.
You are sure it’s a red flag
That’s why you’re here
I’m not going to break up with my bf because we have a great relationship. I’m trying to find solutions on how to get comfortable since it seems like most people think I’m unreasonable
1) They dragged her into it by framing her, that wasn't her meddling. 2) They ruined their own lives. 3) (And this may be the most stupid, but idgaf, imma say it) depending on the Android that is simply NOT TRUE. Hell, Samsung S21 series was the start of being WAY better with cameras than the iPhone 12 and 13 series, and it hasn't let up. Source: I sold phones during the pandemic and I'm a tech nerd.
All this to say, she didn't lose all her friends. She cleaned house to make room for better people.
Good luck to you guys! ?
Very suspicious he kept this a secret for a year.
I’ve had these specific dreams of working at a huge hospital Barnes Jewish hospital and working with their cardio program since I can remember. As a young girl even. For me, this is everything. I just can’t imagine him wanting to dump me now over the future which is so far away
Re-read that whole comment. Everything in that applies to your wife, even if she’s a doctor, no, especially because she’s a doctor! Being a stay at home mom WILL hurt her career in the long term and reduce her overall earning power. Having a kid in the first place already did that. I’m not saying it’s a sacrifice she doesn’t want to make, she very well could, but it’s important for you to understand the impact of these decisions on her.
If you really want her to be a SAHM approach it from the angle of “ I understand this is a big sacrifice that you’re making for our family, what can I do to make it worth it for you?” Then actually discuss how this will affect her career, what the expectations are on both ends, and what options she has in the future. Women in cishet relationships tend to do a significant amount of emotional and domestic labor and this work is uncompensated and widely taken advantage of by their spouses. Be aware of these issues and be proactive! Have regular open dialogue about the dynamic. Be willing to negotiate and make changes so that everyone is happy. Ensure this labor imbalance doesn’t happen in your relationship and maybe she will want to continue making your life this easy and happy.
I feel like this will eat at you continuously. It might be wise to reconsider. I’ve had a career where I traced internationally extensively, and the people I was with always seemed on edge. In the end, I had to settle down for things to work.
How could he follow up if she blocked him on everything and moved far away?
You need to get away from him. This is abuse.
OK, here is the idea: you do this as in a 28 day “him-time”. Than you don't see each other for a week, and have a 28 day “her-time”. You define before what you want included in this.
You know the posts are unfair and one-sided, so don’t read them or the comments.
But you do need to deal with the underlying issues in your relationship. Is she getting help for what sounds like fairly severe mental health issues?
Agreed. You won’t progress as a couple if you don’t have difficult conversations. His actions were disrespectful and crossed your boundaries otherwise you wouldn’t be upset and asking advice from strangers. So only you can accept How people treat you therefore “ teach” them how to treat you. So have that uncomfortable conversation, we can’t do it for you.
Yeah the out-loud wistful reminiscing about good dick delivered like a bad line from a 2000s comedy sounds like pure fantasy, but there’s also the tactic of twisting a story to leave out the obnoxious shit you did that would inspire someone else to say some heinous shit motivated by hurt spite