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Date: October 9, 2022
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I learned a long time ago that how people make you feel is important. If you feel shitty after hanging out with these people, that's important. If your husband makes you feel shitty, but you can't put your finger on why, that's important.
You don't need to prove that they are actually unkind. Your feelings are enough.
Good friends and husbands make you feel great about yourself. They build you up – they don't enjoy tearing you down.
Definitely ditch these people. If your husband makes you feel crap about yourself, ditch him too.
I know the love is still there, he shows it in other ways as well, but his time has been more or less taken up by video games and anime which could very much be a form of stress regulation (which imo isn’t healthy). I’ll try to see what other options I have and discuss this with him in another approach. Thank you for your advice
I’m so sorry, this is ridiculous. I also had an elderly dog who passed recently so I completely get the struggle. It’s so hard when they get old.
However, all of this is a dealbreaker to me, and it’s not because of the dog or because of the snoring, but because you’ve explained many times that this is affecting you and HE IS DOING NOTHING ABOUT IT. A loving partner would do everything to make sure you (and quite frankly the dog!) were comfortable. He’d go to the doctor. He’d get whatever sleep aid is on the market. He’d take his dog to the vet and get her some anti-anxiety medication so she isn’t so stressed too. He could work on finding a place for her to sleep where she felt safe but also where she wasn’t tormenting you. There are solutions here, he hasn’t done any of them. That to me is unacceptable. If he was doing everything he could and you still were having issues, that’s another story, but he just doesn’t care about you or his sad dog.
Go to a hotel for the week and get some rest. Book a massage too. When you’re clear-headed, have a serious discussion with him about his lack of compassion for you is a dealbreaker in this relationship. Either he goes to a doctor and starts working on solutions to these problems, or you walk. This is not a partnership if your partner is leaving you to be stressed like this all alone.
Also, get a box fan, sound machine, and ear plugs while he gets it together. But I suggest you just move out and let him figure it out on his own. If he cares about you, he’ll stop being so selfish and find solutions.
You need to create space in your life to love someone else. Leave first then the love will die faster.
That’s true. Extremely true. I guess I hold on because I believe I’ll never find someone so I settle
You don't. You leave. You cant fix him