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Golden Ticket Show In Progress. Tip 100 to join the show
Date: October 19, 2022
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WeekendPussy
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I don't want to speak for the person you're replying to but I don't think they were saying to leave as much as to accept her leaving. That's really the only option. If things are bad enough that her leaving was justified, he should leave her alone, if her leaving was a low key tantrum, he should leave her alone. She is also an adult & can communicate her feelings. Only she can reopen this conversation after that because otherwise this will almost guaranteedly turn into a cycle of her doing this every time she's pissed. That isn't fair.
same. if somebody does something to upset me, if they try to act like I'm just crazy I do not appreciate that. But the conversation described here would not have made me dump a guy.
I also react the same way when someone reaches out tells me that someone close to them passed away. I give ample space and allow them to reach out when they need something. It can be a bit overwhelming when you have an out pour of people coming to support so I have always figured it’s better to give space rather than take space. Now, I can definitely see how that can be construed as “he doesn’t give a shit.” And when that would have been said to me, I would have clarified my position not say I’m sorry I don’t know how to fix it.
And also, I hate talking on the phone. It’s arduous and very cyclical. I like to get to the point of the conversation and move on with the day. Serious conversations about feelings and state of your relationship I feel are better in person.
200% written by the same person. Every single thing is thr same with no changes
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You want him to change. He’s 45. It isn’t going to happen. He’s not going to stand up to his mom either.
Nobody has suggested “demanding” anything, kiddo. Holding an opinion on whether they choose to do so or not is not a demand. People make their choices and then get to live with what other people think of those choices. Your parents did the normal, loving thing of making any kind of effort. It is bizarre for someone who has none of the circumstances you’re inventing to not make an effort. You clearly need to find an excuse to vent about your big feelings about your own family situation at someone, and it doesn’t bother me, so you’re welcome to keep going and get it out.
The best part of being an adult is getting to pick who you let be part of your life. I love my mom but I also keep a healthy distance from her for my own mental health.
Guys just don't go the extra mile to constantly put themselves places where their friends are. If a friend of mine was going to a Syria lecture that I don't have a specific reason to be at, I'd say “uh ok, have fun with that”. I wouldn't sign up for it just for more time with my friend.
That is often what guys do when trying to date or hook up with a girl though.
You can. But that doesn’t change that it’s often viewed as a slap in the face to your current partner.
I would be surprised if he didn't already know he ruined your birthday… I would be telling him, “you purposely were unkind and spiteful to me. You treated me like garbage for my birthday. I deserve better than that and I need some space to think about if I want to be in this relationship or not.” Take a few days and contemplate if this is how you want your partner to treat you.
Problem solved! Sorry it didn’t work out, but on the other hand, you shouldn’t have to regret or dislike your children’s names that you had to go though all the pregnancy and probably rearing, and all he had to do was name them. Nope. You find someone to have children with that is okay with deciding on something that important together.
To be fair, I'm not even saying that ending the relationship is bad advice. It might be the correct move. But like you confirmed, there's an underlying issue here.
Here's where it gets tricky though, and the difference between a person and a cat; if a cat shows a concerning change in behavior, you take it to the vet. But taking that cat to the vet is easy. As the cat owner, if you want to take the cat to the vet, it goes to the vet. It gets the help it needs and can't decline getting it.
With a human, yes, get them help. But we can't force them. I hope OP can suggest that he get help, but what if he refuses to do so?