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Date: October 25, 2022
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Ugh, I'm sorry you had to go through that.
Do you know if he was dating/seeing other people in that time? For some reason I have this huge paranoia that he's going to be dating while we still live together
Op, you sound a bit Naïve (no offense) I have a 24yr old friend who thinks everyone is nice and good and goes around thinking nobody will do her harm, and tbh you sound just like her :/ what I will say is this all sounds like you were in a miserable relationship and tried to work on it but didnt have the courage to leave on your own. Cue in the musician and at this point, it could’ve been him or just anyone who gave you the time a day for you to get the ok to leave. What you found is an excuse. A tangible one who validated all of your feelings regarding your relationship and suddenly this made it ok for you to leave. And since you need the constant validation for your decisions, you’re here in reddit asking strangers if what you did is ok. Why am I pointing this out? Im in no way judging you, Im just an outsider with an outside/objective perspective and I want you to realize that you dont need this guy to be in your life to make it ok for you to have a divorce. Your own feelings are/were valid enough. But, just the mere fact that this had to happen in order for you to make a decision , shows how you need more therapy and self work than a new relationship.
Please put yourself first in this case, work on being ok by yourself, less codependent and all around well, mentally and emotionally. If not for you, for your kids. I hope everything works out for you! Also, please think about the dangers of moving in with someone you barely know. Reddit can be a bit intense when everyone is voicing an opinion at the same time, but there’s good advice to be found here and the consensus seems to be the same: dont move in with this dude and be on your own for a while, don’t introduce your kids right away etc. I hope you take the time to read the comments, they come (the majority of them) from a good place.
Best of luck!
It's insanely obvious that you should break up NOW. I get that you don't see it cause you're too close to it, but to an outsider it's unbelievably obvious. Seriously break up, please.
You need to pay your debt in full. Speak directly to her mother or father. If they tell you that you do not need to pay, push back once but if they repeat that, you are fine to accept their decision. Thank them and move on. If they do not push back, you need to send them $300 at once.
This is definitely fake because this dude didn't lose his virginity until he was 27 and thinks he's gonna drown in pussy now if he dumps her, it's so hilarious it's gotta be fake.
What country do you live in? What do you mean she wants 10K for marriage? Like a dowry? Dude you’re getting fucking fleeced here. Ask yourself this, if your salary matched hers, would she be with you?
Well not everyone is bright. Sometimes it's better to just be realistic than to imagine your husband will change. If that's not gonna work for you, that's going to make for a harder decision.
That said, my go to advice for a book on communication is “Seven Principals for Making Marriage Work” by Gottman.
Bro. He using his gf as an excuse to get out of work and play with legos. I think he's peaked.
He sounds like a spoilt 13 year old. You can do better.
Good news! You two are stupid for each other! 🙂
The car thing was intimate, but the restaurant was a full-fledged date. You basically even held hands! You two are adorable.
As an over thinker myself, I think I can tell you that your over thinking is getting the best of you. But in a good way! You've got the exciting new relationship butterflies and it's making your mind race. You guys are in the beginning of a relationship and you're just nervous because it hasn't been sealed with a kiss or the label of a “date”.
Who makes the first move is up to the two of you. Turn the flirting up to 11, and he'll probably make a move. There are lots of flirting opportunities at the gym, what with all the stretching and needing a spotter on the bench press 🙂
Whatever your style is, go with it. Just make sure your signals are consistent. He'll make a move eventually, if you don't first.
What’s the insecurity with regard to gaming? Or is it nonspecific, and you also don’t like him having (for example) coworkers who are girls either?