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Date: October 30, 2022
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OP, one of the hardest things to do is stop being someone’s emotional support person. Those kinds of people will take and take and give nothing in return. You gotta get out and not slow yourself to fall back into that trap.
I cut my best male friend (of 15 years) off for the same reason. For years we had separate political and social views and it was ok. Then 2016 and the aftermath happened and I could no longer be friends with someone who stood by those views anymore simply because they helped him financially.
It sucks, but people change
Drugs and sex go hand and hand, you’re just gunna have to trust me on this lol.
Raves…. Sex everywhere. Even in the crowd. ITS A BLAST
Gather as much evidence as you guys can and go to the police
You're both not compatible, that's all it is. He's wanting to stay in the place he knows and isn't willing to compromise on that, that's very limiting but he's allowed to want these things for himself, but it isn't what you want for you and that's OK, too. It's time to move on.
Their*
Otherwise it's “introduce they are side chick”
I don't disagree about the power dynamic, but rent is the most sensible solution in this scenario if they want to live together. They haven't even been together for a year, buying a house together is simply foolish to put it bluntly and as I have said before it's not fair for her to live there for free, so in this case where they are so adamant about living together, rent makes the most sense.
OP – please at the very least take your time considering this situation and your safety.
Shoving your face isn't a red flag – is the actual abuse. The Red Flags are that you say FWB but actually everything you say about the relationship sounds concerning on many levels, its very much like a relationship where you do many things FOR them, and you are completely isolated except for them?
I'm betting they suggested not putting a label on the relationship – also you mention physical violence (with consent) in all honesty given this context that also worries me because abusers often claim its just dominance play but its actually introducing violence with an excuse of sexual context.