First of all, the point of any & all sexual activity with another person is that either both enjoy it enthusiastically or they don’t do it. That includes BDSM.
And again, I feel like this has to be reiterated- if you aren’t wildly enthusiastic about something, don’t do it. The point of sex with another person is that both parties enjoy it – if you do something you don’t want to do, expect your husband to perceive it somehow this is how the shitstorm you have described ensues & both of you end up feeling hurt & misunderstood.
Secondly you have to communicate; doubly so when you’re doing something like this – like, over-communicate; your husband is not a mind reader.
Neither of you sound like great communicators- I think that’s the thing you need to work on together.
He sounds like my ex husband. He would complain there was nothing to eat when I’d just been shopping. I would open the fridge and it was full. He would then say “but that’s not food, it’s ingredients” …..
Also agree. I was in this same situation on the BF side of it years ago. Communication with your SO is always absolutely vital (and not just in this situation). He needs to know so that he doesn’t accidentally make things worse. Remember that we guys are problem solvers. You put a problem in front of us and we will tackle it, so be specific that the way to solve this situation is by doing nothing except giving your friend space and time.
It’s hard to let a friend go for a while. Sounds like she values your friendship so when she figures it out she will return.
At first we were both unsure, his exact words were “I will support you no matter what your decision is”, at this point, things were amazing with us. Over time his excitement seemed to grow but so did his negative behaviour. If he didn’t want the baby I wish he would have said from the start, rather than giving me false hope. I think I always knew I’d be doing it alone in the back of my head as I’ve made all of my plans moving forward in a way that doesn’t have to include him, maybe that’s because of how unreliable he’s been. I didn’t realise I was doing it at the time but now I think I’m so calm about it all because I can cope without him here, in fact, it’s felt a lot more peaceful without him here.
I agree to that. But since our conversation was chill and light-hearted, I find it strange that he didn't give me an overly supportive reply, a teasing one or even a roast.
His reply was dead serious, catching me completely off-guard.
Of course she is still angry. Because you don't really seem to understand with or agree with her point.
This wasn't about being cheery. She didn't ask you to juggle for the friend.
She said it showed a lack of manners. And it did. Like the most basic manners is you acknowledge people, especially a friend, when you see them in your house. Even when prompted you did it in the most dismissive way possible.
The friend would have pretty solid grounds to assume you hate her at this point. That's how you react when someone you genuinely do not like interacting with tries to speak to you and you want to be as rude to them as possible.
A simple 'hey, nice to see you. I've got a splitting headache so I am going to lay down' would have avoided this and the absurdity of that is probably what makes this hardest for your wife to deal with.
?
Good luck. Hope you are able to enjoy the night and not worry about them.
Girl, just no.
First of all, the point of any & all sexual activity with another person is that either both enjoy it enthusiastically or they don’t do it. That includes BDSM.
And again, I feel like this has to be reiterated- if you aren’t wildly enthusiastic about something, don’t do it. The point of sex with another person is that both parties enjoy it – if you do something you don’t want to do, expect your husband to perceive it somehow this is how the shitstorm you have described ensues & both of you end up feeling hurt & misunderstood.
Secondly you have to communicate; doubly so when you’re doing something like this – like, over-communicate; your husband is not a mind reader.
Neither of you sound like great communicators- I think that’s the thing you need to work on together.
what is wrong with you u weirdo
He sounds like my ex husband. He would complain there was nothing to eat when I’d just been shopping. I would open the fridge and it was full. He would then say “but that’s not food, it’s ingredients” …..
Okay then why do you feel the need to tell her?
Yes so why not use regular condoms? What could possibly be the upside to these?
sounds to me like your friend has a gambling problem. he should seek help and not play at all, even if it were only $1 a week
Your partner is older than your mother. How old are you?
Also agree. I was in this same situation on the BF side of it years ago. Communication with your SO is always absolutely vital (and not just in this situation). He needs to know so that he doesn’t accidentally make things worse. Remember that we guys are problem solvers. You put a problem in front of us and we will tackle it, so be specific that the way to solve this situation is by doing nothing except giving your friend space and time.
It’s hard to let a friend go for a while. Sounds like she values your friendship so when she figures it out she will return.
Best of luck and take care of yourself first.
There's a real reason why women give birth and men don't.
Just sayin'.
She may be delusional, but your obviously a fucking idiot.
I'm unfortunately very familiar with Xanax.
At first we were both unsure, his exact words were “I will support you no matter what your decision is”, at this point, things were amazing with us. Over time his excitement seemed to grow but so did his negative behaviour. If he didn’t want the baby I wish he would have said from the start, rather than giving me false hope. I think I always knew I’d be doing it alone in the back of my head as I’ve made all of my plans moving forward in a way that doesn’t have to include him, maybe that’s because of how unreliable he’s been. I didn’t realise I was doing it at the time but now I think I’m so calm about it all because I can cope without him here, in fact, it’s felt a lot more peaceful without him here.
I agree to that. But since our conversation was chill and light-hearted, I find it strange that he didn't give me an overly supportive reply, a teasing one or even a roast.
His reply was dead serious, catching me completely off-guard.
Of course she is still angry. Because you don't really seem to understand with or agree with her point.
This wasn't about being cheery. She didn't ask you to juggle for the friend.
She said it showed a lack of manners. And it did. Like the most basic manners is you acknowledge people, especially a friend, when you see them in your house. Even when prompted you did it in the most dismissive way possible.
The friend would have pretty solid grounds to assume you hate her at this point. That's how you react when someone you genuinely do not like interacting with tries to speak to you and you want to be as rude to them as possible.
A simple 'hey, nice to see you. I've got a splitting headache so I am going to lay down' would have avoided this and the absurdity of that is probably what makes this hardest for your wife to deal with.