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Date: October 9, 2022
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Stop smoking pot and go to therapy.
If you would chose a relationship over a toxic behavior that impacts your capability to mentally fully function than you clearly have a emotional dependency on it.
Try to start working out instead or go for walks to calm down.
It’s weird that she saw your twitter handle and immediately started going through two years of data.
Definitely feels like deeper issues going on here. Yes, it’s dumb to like lingerie photos, especially in a relationship, but it’s also strange that she put in that much work.
Easy:
I feel like when you talk down to me and patronize me, you are being a self-righteous pretentious AH, trying to bully me by thinking that just because you're a therapist you're superior. I feel like I don't want to have to explain to a grown man why leaving dental floss all over the house is disgusting and makes me feel like I have to infantilize you. And no one wants to have sex with their child.
So I feel like with relationship is over, and if I ever find out you use my sex/intimate life in your therapy again, I will report you for unprofessional conduct.
I call that a soft close.
You get aroused but you don’t enjoy sex? If reducing the porn doesn’t help, then that’s something to discuss with a regular or sex therapist. If that’s not an option, maybe post to r/sex, see if someone there can help.
You don’t need to like dogs, similarly you don’t need to like anything.
She playing mind games. Move on and find someone who actually wants to date you.
You'll get over this. But if I were you, I'd start working towards being more independent and separate from your family.
I have told him over and over again how it hurts me when he hangs out with Jack. I am not going to tell a grown ass man to not be friends with someone. He said, he'd limit contact and hanging out yet took a whole fking cake for his birthday and came home proud saying how grateful Jack was.
I have cried, about this issue many issue. He thinks as long as I don't have to see him, I should be fine with it.
He didn’t respond. I accused him of being unemotional and uncaring. He got mad because he felt he didn’t have the right to put up boundaries and had to cater to my needs at the expense of his own well being. There had been a week of constant arguing and fighting and he said he just wanted a good weekend because he was already at his limit. I can see both of our sides here, as often is the case. So this is abuse? I ask because I seriously am not sure
Yup, I kind of got that. You don’t want to become too avoidant that it impacts your relationships with both parties. He definitely needs to be the one to say something or it’ll just come off as you being possessive/jealous. If she continues after it’s addressed by him, that’s when you get involved and also loop in her mom so that it doesn’t come off as cornering her.
You need to tell him to delete any explicit photos he has of you and you need to watch him do it. Then you need to tell him that it's over. Forget about “if he doesn't respect your boundaries.” He's already demonstrated that he doesn't respect you. Don't offer him another chance to prove it.
I fucking DARE you to show your man this thread…he'd dump you in a heartbeat…. ? ? ? ?
Yep you sure should be. Clearly she’s more his priority than you are and your relationship. I would really think about this. There’s so many Reddit posts that start out. Whoops, my boyfriend slept with his best friend.
I would try to decide whether you’re going to be in the relationship. I almost feel like you wanna know when position, and the only time that you will get some validation is when somebody crosses a line and he feels bad and tells you.
I do understand his perspective and it’s very close to yours. I don’t think he’s being malevolent or stepping out or anything like that. But I’ve also communicated my need (a two minute phone call to say goodnight) over and over and over. And I’ve explained why it’s important to me. And he still won’t do it’s. He’s by no means an affectionate person, he doesn’t provide for me or do sweet little things or buy presents or show affection in some other ways of doing something for me.
So I have just a few requests, which go un acknowledged. But he swears he does care when I push him just doesn’t show it in any way that I’ve communicated I need to feel valued.
So I do understand his perspective but in this case I have a need as well. I need to know how to set a boundary without saying. Look it I feel unloved and alone and uncared for much longer it’s over.
After 3 months she only realized just now? Nahhh Besides, she didn't feel guilty about the cheating, she felt bad because she had to tell you.
She was going on perfectly happy until she told you. Then she suddenly put up some crocodile tears. and yes, trust your gut, she didn't lash out at her dad, she lashed out at you.
How would this affect her dad in any way? In fact, she already told you why she did it, she wanted “validation”. Imagine the next time she's in a validation-needing mood..
Furthermore, just imagine being in a relationship, swiping through tinder multiple times a day, and still not being swept away by guilt since you're in a relationship. No, instead, you match, meet up and have sex. And then later, after you're FORCED to tell your partner. “Oh yeah, sorry :(” Does it sound like bs? That's because it is!
End it!
Even if you don't, the trust that has been broken is always going to affect your relationship