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Livia, 99 y.o.
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Date: October 9, 2022
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It's an older reference but it checks out
It sounds like you are in a difficult situation. You may want to try talking to your ex and explaining the situation to her in a calm and respectful manner. It may help to have a third party mediator present, such as a mutual friend or a professional mediator, to help facilitate the conversation. If your ex still refuses to return your belongings, you may want to consider seeking legal advice to understand your options. It is important to keep in mind that taking legal action can be expensive and time-consuming, so it may be worth trying to resolve the issue through other means first.
This isn't something for your gf to get involved with. Addiction is a lifelong disease. If your mother falls to addiction again, can your gf hold her accountable? If not, what value is her support?
Posts like this are why it's so important we, as a society, teach people about healthy relationships at school, what an abusive relationship looks like, and how to escape from it.
Spoiler alert: this isn't a healthy relationship.
This is the 4th time you've posted about this guy doing things that most people would consider to be controlling behaviour, and yet, apparently, you're still questioning whether you're the one in the wrong here.
You aren't.
You are a victim of a controlling relationship, and the sooner you escape from it the better. You're 21; you've your whole life ahead of you. Do you really want to be walking on eggshells, being told what you can and can't do, who you can and can't see, for the rest of your life with this guy?
If you dont want to meet or even talk to him, just block him. Then you wont be tripping yourself out about “what does this text mean” or whatever. I mean there's no way reddit strangers would know better than you. But it's obivous he has something he wants to tell you. What do ex's have to confess to us? Well it's either they need to come clean about something (for their own conciosuness) or they still have feelings for you. So if you dont ever want to get back with this guy, then just block and stop worring about it.
Reddit will throw metaphorical hands for someone stepping up despite knowing things may be difficult for them.