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Room for online sex video chat EllyNora
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Date: December 26, 2022
You said it yourself – the things you want most in a relationship are quality time and physical touch. You aren’t getting those.
Sometimes you meet someone that’s a great person, but not a great fit. That’s why you date. It’s good that you know what you want, and it’s also good that your gf knows what she wants. She’s prioritizing a lot of things ahead of you, and you also have very different attitudes towards pre-marital sex. No judgement on any of that, but it does sound like you two are incompatible.
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You don't change it. You're who you are, and that's not negotiable. You can try to change habits, but you can never change temperament, and you should never try or be ashamed of who you are. You are special and wonderful and interesting and if he doesn't think so, go find somebody who does. This is what you are young to do, to find out who you are and maybe find somebody who is compatible with that. But you'll never be happy long term trying to be somebody you're not. And nobody likes a faker.
Before we get to the main problem, I want to point out that the process of getting a place together should involve figuring out what both people can afford first. If everything is going to be split 50/50 then you should never move into a place that the person with the lowest income can't afford.
But obviously the bigger problem is that he chose to stop working and hasn't gotten a new job yet. I don't know if he has some mental health issues going on or if he just thinks why bother when you're covering the rent anyway? But I'd put your foot down that the relationship is over if he can't get his shit together.
I saw a similar story on tiktok earlier this year so while I do think similar things have happened before I agree this reads as fake. The girl who's story I watched was dating this guy who would slip up and call her “Abc” sometimes and so would his family when her name was “xyz”. Would sometimes text her weird things like I brought you flowers today. found out not too much longer that his longtime gf died in a shocking accident. She said he confessed to finding someone who looked just like her on tinder/bumble whatever had her saved under the dead girls name in his phone. She 100% bounced immediately.
You know it went further, right?
That is a loaded question in general, I most definitely do not tell my partner every little thought and feeling or report every interaction I have with them.
But I really may be missing something. What exactly is the secret you are keeping? I just read your post again and I really am not seeing what you are. Can you spell out what you are keeping from him in one simple sentence?
Your very dramatic title “I almost cheated on my husband” does not match your description of the evening. If you went out that night and put on very sexy underwear just in case you were having sex then saw this man and thought “this is my chance” and then invited him back to your room and kicked him out at the last minute, yes you are entertaining the idea of cheating.
If the idea never occurred to you until you were drunk and aggressively propositioned in a vulnerable environment and when given the chance to think your own conscious was able to save you…. yeah no, you are most definitely not starting down the road of becoming “a cheater” or whatever the heck people are feeding you.
I think you need to work through processing this on your own a bit before you are able to speak to him about it?
You mean ex-friend right OP?
You're 23. You have your whole life ahead of you and you're already in a dead bedroom scenario.
Sexually you sound incompatible. This is the age where you should be learning about yourself and things you like/dislike. You may have grown into different people. Unless there is some medical reason that can resolve this..I'd be looking to move on.
Sunken cost fallacy. Do not waste any more time on something that is destined to end through incompatibility.
I’m not obese? I have physical limitations due to a health condition I was born with. What kind of asshole are you
I don't know if anyone has mentioned this but very few people can recall every bad thing they have done to someone in a relationship. And even then, not to the extent of rattling them off like items on a to do list. So, there's definitely something very hinky there. Second, he knew he was hurting you. He knew what he did was wrong. Doesn't matter why he did it, it was intentional. So his apology is just more manipulation. Matter of fact, he has you so figured out that he said all the right things to make you second guess yourself. STOP talking to him. There's a reason your brother gets annoyed every time he shows up. He's slowly worming his way back into your mind. If he shows up again let your brother handle it. Tell your friends not to tell you anything about him, good or bad, and simply go on an interaction diet. Then get therapy if you aren't already. You took the first step and left, now take the next one and stick to it.
Dude, you’re 37. You’re still a young man. Plenty of time to get over the woman who wouldn’t wait, and find the woman who’s waiting to find you.
So yes to all?.
Ok then eww. It is up to you but yeah that hurts. I will tell everyone in the family of how they treat you and then go NC on them. So far none of them ever apologies to you at all?.
I think it’s safe to take the lack of an invitation as a slight. Since you were not invited, you are not obligated to send a gift.
This is a HER problem.
She needs to deal with her retrospective jealousy elsewhere.
Especially after just four months? Nah.
Cut the loss.
I feel like there have been a lot of fart posts here lately.
Never ever loan money you are not a bank. You can gift friends and relatives but loans are just NO! Take this as a hard lesson learned. Get a second job if you really need that money because you are never getting it back.
No chance this is real
What do you mean nothing? There are a lot of pros to marriage for both parties. Cons too, but also pros.
Info: is he still watching lots of porn when you aren't around?
It might be that she knows you’re on to her and is over compensating by being overly sexual to lead you on that she only has eyes for you.
You need definitive proof sooner than later. So you don’t have to be stuck in this middle ground.
No way this is true. No way you would confess this shitshow to ask “what should I say to him?” Not buying it.
this is a real kink?
Don't do this to yourself. It's exhausting and whether she buys nice stuff or not, it won't be worth it. You'll be paying the therapy bills.
Go and speak to several divorce attorneys, pick one. Give them all of the evidence of his cheating and ask them what your entitled to, house, savings etc. Have them sort out a custody arrangements, child support and alimony. If you live in an at fault State sue his AP.
Start divorce proceedings, tell him that the divorce proceedings will continue until he has gone to marriage counselling with you, and proved that he wants this marriage to work out. You are not remaining in limbo whilst he decides if he loves you enough to completely cut his AP out of his life. He needs to agree to an open phone, electronics and email policy with no deleting.
He and his AP have been having an emotional affair for a long time, and it’s most definitely turned into a physical one. You could reach out to her ex partner to find out what they know about the affair.
Get yourself checked out for STD’s. Lock down your credit and that of your children. Separate your finances. If you want him to remain in the house he can stay I a spare room or sleep on the settee. He does not get your bedroom, that is now your safe place.
Dude, ignore your mom and do what feels best. I'm not going to assume alienation or how good you feel your dad is or whatever — only you can weigh that.
Girl. Why the fuck do you wanna put up with this? Dump him and find someone better whose not afraid of soap
I mean… it is your house. He isn't paying a dime towards rent. And he's being super inconsiderate and rude and awful by bringing up painful memories for you and making it ALL ABOUT HIM.
Wtf? Block his ass and never speak to him again.
I agree completely, and all these comments lying to her about how great it will be to be a single mom is just ignorant and not helpful whatsoever. If she's fully aware of the consequences of being a single parent and how hard it is on the child, then whatever. But I think a part of her hopes that the father will go back to her and raise the kid with her. I can't think of another reason why she would do this when she's 25.
??
Because many times when partners try to communicate something that is bothering them especially men the other person mostly women would just pretend that everything is okay and that it is his problem! 2 simple questions 1)!who is the one that says sorry the most and 2) who is the one that tries to make up with the other partner the most? If the answer is both him then he is not happy, he just have given up talking with you!
I see 295 comments of people telling you to leave him. I understand if you don’t want to leave it might be hard to accept the truth, but you need to open your mind. If you want advice, it’s here.
Definitely abusive.
People are right about your stepmom and dad, but let me add something different. You need to put boundaries with your mother. Why is she forcing you to keep the peace? She seems to be still obsessed with your father. I would set very hard boundaries with her as well and make it clear that she should not force the relationship between you and your dad. It’s not her place. And if she tried again come up with some consequences. They way she’s acting she is putting your father on a higher importance level than you and that’s simply not okay.
OP asked if it was rape because she didn’t consent to be woken up by sex. If it was ok with them, she would have mentioned it.
Again, sex Ed shouldn’t be only on the school, actually they should complement what’s taught at home. My kids know all about consent, and I didn’t wait for school to teach them since that’s my duty as a parent. Politicians have nothing to say when there are laws stating that this is rape.
“Sugar baby” is not NOT what I would call those transactions.
That said, it’s all in the telling. “I dated/saw a creep who bought me a lot of gifts and helped me financially, but I feel bad about it now”, is a lot different than “I was briefly a high-end call girl.”
You can put down the VERY reasonable boundary of “I won't be in a relationship with someone who continues to pursue unethical, maladaptive “treatment” from a non-licensed “therapist””.
Talk to him about it. Tell him your worries about her trying to coax you two into opening your relationship, about how uncomfortable it makes you, about how you think your husband would benefit from actual board-certified professional therapist that uses peer-reviewed science to back their treatment plans.
Your relationship started with a lie, and you let that slide. You prioritized his needs over yours time and time again. It's natural that he would expect you to continue to agree to do what is best for him, what he wants, even if it's painful and potentially ruinous for you.
Are you happy? Do you feel respected, heard and understood? Do you feel safe and comfortable to talk about things that bother you? Is this relationship one you would want for your children? Are you settling because it's been so long and you're afraid to be alone with three kids?
Or showbiz. It rarely ends well.
I know plenty of dudes like this, and pretty much all of them eat like 7 year olds.
Women talk like this and don't realize how much they are demeaning themselves and each other by association. If your husband is a child, then you're a pedophile.
People have different values. Not everyone gives a shit if there are shiplap “Live Laugh Love” decorations in the bathroom. Not everyone gives a shit if their meals would get them a “Good Boy!” sticker from mommy. Not everyone gives a shit if their kitchen looks like something on HGTV. Not everyone cares if there are scented decorative soaps in the dish by the sink.
If OP's boyfriend wants to work an easy job, good for him. If he wants to waste it all on DoorDash, that's stupid, but so is spending money on purses and shoes or the billions of other trivialities we first-worlders spend money on. OP isn't morally superior because she has more greens on her plate.
She's a grown up. She can simply stop shopping for him and cooking for him. If she just does it without complaint then what indication would he even have that it's a problem?
What do women think they're accomplishing by constantly ranking themselves this way against their partners? It certainly isn't bringing them any joy.