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Date: September 26, 2022
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I think it’s really up to you two to decide what you want to do now. It is possible she was uncertain about your relationship at first and not really committed, but once she was committed, she cut off her other prospects and focused on you. Or it is possible she is lying.
I think you should let your memories of the last 5 years be a partial guide. How was she with you, and what was your relationship like? I think it would be fine if you wanted to have a few more talks with her and maybe others to determine whether you can live with this in her past.
Honestly, someone kind and loving doesn't do these sort of things. Or he may be all of those things but he doesn't respect you.. at all.
Why would he though? Look what you put up with under the guise of him being kind and loving. Girl..
take the gift and ask him directly when you put it in his hand. He’s cheating btw
You are well within your right to be upset about this. You've never met him,you know nothing about him and you know nothing about his life. He's intoxicated and suicidal at your house with your GF, I also would be upset . If he is truly suicidal he needs help. If you knew him and knew about his life it would be different. I'm married and if one of my friends or husband's friends did this to us and put us in a bad situation he would be pissed because it's disrespectful to him and you can't trust an intoxicated person, to many things can go wrong and people get blamed for helping. My husband would come home and take care of it himself.
Sounds like you would like living in the city. Cool. Live in the city. But for the love of all that makes sense, don't sell that house. Especially after just 1 year. How long did you work in order to save up and get your credit up? All kinds of financial things can happen in a relationship, and you can't control them all.
Due to past experience, I will likely keep my condo even after marriage and make sure I have the option to move back to it in case things don't work out (at the cost after payoff (got a killer deal), it will almost be competitive with storage and I've lost a house/mortgage/credit by committing to a situation and person who I was with for about a year before I bailed on my house).
It sounds like you are doing well, financially. Good for you. So you can probably keep the house even if living and contributing to the rent in an apartment. I would hang onto the house empty for a year or more, probably, and likely keep it at least until married and/or tryinf to buy a house together, but my life is not the same as yours and I'm getting too old and tired to start over if there's an oops.
OTOH, if your GF doesn't want to leave her apartment (is that the case? Or is she looking to move to a pricier place?), her needs/wants/reasons are important too. Giving up the lifestyle and options she loves is also a big ask after just a year, and it sounds like locationwise, things lie in her favor. That has nothing to do with whether you should give up what you worked for (that is a different situation and discussion unless you can't afford to keep the house and chip in at the apartment).
I would tell my SO in that case that I worked hard to earn that place and I wasn't willing to give it up because right now she wants me to. If she isn't understanding (and you an can afford to pay one while contributing to the other) then I would think that either she isn't willing to compromise with me, or she has plans for the money (does she? Do you? Have you discussed it? I would, but I would also make clear that I wasn't dumping the place anytime soon so YMMV).
Call me cynical, but a good portion of my relationships have involved me changing my living situation for a situation where I contributed most of the income (not always bad) and ended up stuck with nowhere to go when it ended. I wouldn't wish homelessness, bankruptcy, losing years of hard work in terms of credit and assets or the rock bottom that typically accompanies those things on anyone, and it sounds like you dob't have to choose one or the other (keeping your house or dropping it to be with her).
Yeah still it’s an idiotic “gift” if it’s not all-inclusive or at least planned/discussed with your partner
Well he is your best friend. And I’m assuming you are close. Are you apposed to going out with him? Would you like to? Also I had the similar experience with a my friend. I told her I had feelings. But we made sure that didn’t affect our relationship. She wasn’t into me. Oh well. We are still really good friends and talk to each other every day.
Just because you don’t want it to be doesn’t mean it isn’t. Ultimately it’s your choice what you decide to put up with im just saying you should really reflect
But when they don't show any interest/ initiative what should I do
Girl please run and never look back! This guy is probably a porn addict. I can be projecting but I see the red flags.
As someone who has a porn addiction that is mostly centered around analsex I know what that obsession can do. In my case I have never forced my wife to do it and we don’t engage in it. We have tried but I know it could hurt her and I never want her to hurt. So the only times we have done it is because she has brought it up. If she never brings it up again I won’t do it either.
This guy clearly has some sort of addiction and a very pornographic mindset because all he cares about is his own pleasure. How you feel and what’s best for you doesnt matter to him. He has destroyed his brain with porn so he can’t even stay hard unless it follows the pattern of the porn he watches. And I am pretty sure that involves a lot of anal during pain too. I know my addiction have wanted me to go there and I have had to actively stay away because that’s what an addiction to porn does.
He is not worth it. He doesn’t love you nor does he respect you. To him you are just a sex toy that can move and talk. Love yourself enough to get away. You don’t deserve to be treated like this.
But there IS a difference and you are just assuming she’s making a mistake (because a woman with beats and mother of two teenage girls can’t tell the difference between young and small).
I’m sorry men are fucking dickheads and told you sit like that. But it doesn’t mean that everyone makes that mistake or that people with breasts can’t distinguish the difference.
We all know that teens have as varied breast sizes as adults and that small only equals young, like pre-pubescent young and fuck men manning that association.
???? thank you.