I'm a mum of 2, my eldest gets attached really easily so if the kid is like that I understand their mother's reluctance, being in the same bed overnight is one step closer to a family unit.
You seem to have the mechanics understood in that the little one comes first. However, there's a whole thing around emotions and attachment that is so hard to explain and more difficult to navigate.
The biggest piece of advice I can give is to talk to your partner. Not in the heat of the moment at a time when you're chilling over a coffee. Don't go looking for confrontation, look for a discussion. “Hey, I get this is an issue for you, and I'm just looking to understand.”
You'll only get to the heart of it when you ask the question. Good Luck.
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You're so heartless lol. You can only see things in a transactional way and don't see anything out of an eye of empathy or love for ones family. My god you are insufferable
Yes you are reasonable but it's up to you to reinforce any boundaries you have. That is, leave the relationship if this bothers you too much. Tbh it's hard to decide if she's just being supportive or if they have an emotional affair or more. It's quite possible him being sick makes her see him differently and reevaluate their relationship.
There is a book: Not “Just friends” by Shirley glass which is recommended in many posts it might bring some insight into whether your wife is having an emotional affair or just being supportive.
Thank you, that sounds like a good course of action. I think I’ll tell my therapist now and my dad tomorrow when he comes over for his laundry. One question though, what should I do with it? I have half a mind to throw it away or something but I’m not sure. I’ve never dealt with a situation like this.
Ummm
I'm a mum of 2, my eldest gets attached really easily so if the kid is like that I understand their mother's reluctance, being in the same bed overnight is one step closer to a family unit.
You seem to have the mechanics understood in that the little one comes first. However, there's a whole thing around emotions and attachment that is so hard to explain and more difficult to navigate.
The biggest piece of advice I can give is to talk to your partner. Not in the heat of the moment at a time when you're chilling over a coffee. Don't go looking for confrontation, look for a discussion. “Hey, I get this is an issue for you, and I'm just looking to understand.”
You'll only get to the heart of it when you ask the question. Good Luck.
Right, I think this dynamic is typically also very damaging to the “favored” child or children, too.
Hello /u/fuccthrowawayaccount,
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Thank you ver much I’ll try.
I hate that I’m so indecisive and simply can’t put my wants first. Thank you for saying this.
You're so heartless lol. You can only see things in a transactional way and don't see anything out of an eye of empathy or love for ones family. My god you are insufferable
You are currently in an abusive relationship. Verbal/mental
Yes you are reasonable but it's up to you to reinforce any boundaries you have. That is, leave the relationship if this bothers you too much. Tbh it's hard to decide if she's just being supportive or if they have an emotional affair or more. It's quite possible him being sick makes her see him differently and reevaluate their relationship.
There is a book: Not “Just friends” by Shirley glass which is recommended in many posts it might bring some insight into whether your wife is having an emotional affair or just being supportive.
There is a difference between being scared of versus wary of.
Thank you, that sounds like a good course of action. I think I’ll tell my therapist now and my dad tomorrow when he comes over for his laundry. One question though, what should I do with it? I have half a mind to throw it away or something but I’m not sure. I’ve never dealt with a situation like this.