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Naked @Goal!!! [Multi Goal]
Date: October 18, 2022
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Naked @Goal!!! [Multi Goal]
She’s not interested. It’s a hard truth but fuck it don’t waste time….the next one will be.
He was using when he cheated. Never did anything like that before his relapse or after in the month+ that we’ve been clean now.
It could be a few things. If you don’t mind me asking, how often do you guys have sex? And does he generally have a high or low libido?
If he’s overweight, he might have high blood pressure and that would definitely influence the quality of his erection. He should get a physical and bloodwork to check if he didn’t do this already. Since he can maintain an erection during doggy & cowgirl, it might be because you’re the one doing the physical work of sex and he can concentrate on the feeling.
He may be fatigued from work and daily stressors. Does he decompress after work? Does he do anything to relax in the evening?
Since he can stay hard during cowgirl, I doubt he gets soft during missionary because he doesn’t like your body. Cowgirl gives a similar POV to missionary and if he didn’t like what he was seeing, then he’d go soft in either position. In my experience, doggy and cowgirl allow for deeper penetration and this can make things feel “tighter” for a guy because he is deeper inside of you. Perhaps that’s also why he tends to maintain an erection during those position.
Porn use could be a huge factor in this too. Since he won’t tell you whether he watches it or not, then I’m not sure where else to go with this comment. Frequent porn use and masturbation desensitizes the brain and body, so he might have a bit of death grip.
People don't act nice when you suggest they're a bad parent because you aren't reading replies to questions I've already answered
Why the fuck are you not upset with your husband for not telling you this instead of so mad at Ellinor who didn't even know he was married???
Or does he like them???
She’s avoiding taking responsibility for her problems and actions. If she’s actually scared, it’s probably because she’s trying to avoid talking about the underlying issues that motivate her behavior. Therapy isn’t easy and yeah, it can be scary. But she’s being abusive and it’s a dealbreaker situation.
She either gets into therapy or you break up. Tell her that and don’t go over to her house or be alone with her until she’s in a better mental state.
And keep in mind that if it’s all too much, you don’t have to stick around for this relationship. There is a huge difference between her pouting when you have to leave vs physically restraining you. It’s creepy and scary.
I was a single mom, so I can understand this feeling. In all honesty it takes time, but you have to remember that you're a badass and you left a shitty relationship and you deserve to be loved and wanted. (Even if it is only causal) . Sending you lots of love and hugs
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Honestly, I don't know what to do.
I want him to own up to whatever happened, so we can talk it through and hopefully move on from it. But if he's completely refusing to acknowledge it, what can I do? I don't want to give up.
Fair enough! Deffo don’t want to read too much into it
I know people will tell me I need to block her and get on with my life, but I don’t know how
Your phone has this really nifty feature that allows you to block individual phone numbers. Social media sites all have a block button too.
I'm really confused as to why I see this same thing posted every couple of months. Surely multiple people cannot be in this situation with pee man. He is always aggressively refusing to do anything about it so it's obvious that he should either seek help or you should leave.
Let me be completely clear – you should not have a baby if you don't want them, but she should have a kid if she wants them.
Which means at this crossroad you break up.
Do not stay with someone when it crushes their life goals. And don't crush your own.
That’s kinda what thinking too. Like was she ever actually poly or was that just something she was trying out for a bit. They were monogamous their entire marriage up until the end. I get the feeling from her that she’s actually looking for a monogamous relationship but was just enjoying the polyamory for a bit until she found someone.
It’s a weird thing to mention. It’s one of those things that goes without saying in interracial relationships (because they wouldn’t be together if they didn’t align politically, since them even being together is “political”). He also didn’t mention what those political values were, so why even bring it up unless he’s dogwhistling?
Yea I'm surprised no one else has really said that in the main comments. From what I read they both said the person was hot? Not sure why it got blown up but the jab at the friends partner definitely escalated it further
I have so many questions. You realize this isn't normal? Why is the dog not house trained?
You're asking if you should leave him for calling you too sensitive…
I made the comment that I AM more sensitive right now
Yet admitted you're more sensitive now?
Yes, leave this poor guy. Let him go.
Keep in touch.
This is a deal breaker for you. When you come back try to stay calm and don't do anything rash. Take much evidence as you can in case something happens. You don't trust him anymore, if you will cut contact, remove him from everywhere, don't delete text conversations but block him, maybe change locks and protect your home all you can.
Less disappointment probably sums it up. I feel like I put in alot of energy in to them and never get it back. Its less that I want nothing to do with them and more I don't have the energy to keep on walking on egg shells and pretend it's all okay. You are right of course it has to be my decision what happens
Well fuck.. I'm sorry that happened to you really!
but i dont think that helps OP. It won't get her out of this mess she's in.
id rather just you know be married to a man that only wants to be with me.. as a woman and not go on holiday's with his bf and then move him into my home.
I'd end up burning all his shit on the lawn and telling everyone he can have the house for his bf then. Bt i love myself too much to see all these red flags the size of China and still convince myself It's a marriage..
No thank u.
Throw it away? Dude, it has already been pitched out.
Send her to the streets.
The grass likely won't be greener but you should probably leave if you're fantasising about a completely different life.
It would depend, is the person going for more of a Tom Selleck in the 80s look or Victorian bare knuckle boxer? The former is ok but the latter really requires commitment.
Time to talk to some lawyers.
I can’t imagine going through 10 years of this. This is so new to me and it’s already killing me. I am so glad your friend got out and is in a great place, now!
It’s when you shit your pants, scoop it out with your bare hands, and rub it all over yourself
You can say that again. Father of wife got off easy.
You can say that again. Father of wife got off easy.
if you really care for her perhaps consider couples therapy after she decides to talk to you. leave her for now and don't bother with it. if she's mature enough she won't try to gaslight you with “oh you didnt come to check up on me, you ignored me”
I imagine he presented it as a great gift for her husband. “Hey, don't you have an anniversary coming up? Have you thought about a gift for your husband? You know, a lot of women are getting boudoir shoots for their spouses these days… hey, I could take those pictures for you, if you'd like!”
The thing that really worries me is that he still has all the pictures, which opens the wife up to some pretty serious trauma– assuming she doesn't already feel coerced and used.
That's not what they're replying to, read it again
the mental load also involves him expecting you to tell him what to do and when
We all like to browse the bakery section. Doesn’t mean we’re going to buy a cake though. I think you’re being insecure, there’s two things you need to do that will help you stop feeling insecure about this sort of thing.
Realise that just because you’re in a relationship it doesn’t mean other people become invisible. You’re always going to see or meet other people you find attractive, so will she. It’s unreasonable to expect your partner in a relationship to go through life never finding other people attractive Slightly harder to initiate, but my wife and I have always been quite open in talking about who we think is hot, be it on the TV, someone at work etc. It’s a game changer and if you can have that openness it builds a stronger relationship
Do you two have any significant differences that could possibly be disapproved of by more conservative parents? Such as you having colored hair or piercings, a different religion, etc?
This is not the case in every state.
I know, why I referred to the state.
And stealthing is an actual crime in some if not all states.
I know, I dont think all.
Verklempt as in hard to open? Verklempt as the german verklempt?
I should add I am definitely straight
The secret to any good and long lasting relationship is communication. You need to talk to her before all your resentment builds up
Tell the truth to her, be kind, be gentle, but let her know you need more
I wonder if it bc for her hair type there’s not many options for shampoo
Sounds like you poisoned the well by oversharing and everyone has made their own opinions of your BF based on his treatment of you and their own experience with the man.
You still have your issues, which I assume you share like everything else, this is unlikely to improve his standing in their eyes. Why would anyone really be enthusiastic? He has to prove himself to them all over again.
LEAVE HIM!!! He will not get better it will only get worse. This is not a healthy relationship seriously stop wasting your time because you think you are in love. Also almost every single time someone starts harshly accusing the other of cheating it is because they are the ones actually cheating. They get super paranoid knowing that they are getting away with it so automatically try and push the blame on you so u don’t start to look into them.
Unless you are only marrying to get a portion of his billions – I wouldn’t marry him.
But I doubt that because he’s washing your dog in the shower and you’re doing your own at home pedicure for the wedding.
So why he hell would you marry him?
Maybe I’m reading too much in your wording, but it’s contradictory that you find emotional connection yet you described her like a set of traits on a checklist. Having chemistry with someone at the beginning is a good proxy for emotional connection and chemistry is an intangible.
you need to see & tell her face to face that she misheard.
don't do it on the phone as she needs to see you sincere loving face.
good luck bro!
Yikes, what a mess