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Feeling as the universe in ectasys
Date: October 30, 2022
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WeekendPussy
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And that’s where I’m at right now the situation happened like 3 or 4 months ago and I have been trying to show I want to be fully committed and for a while we were actually going really good after it originally happened it only was brought up again last night as she asked me why I did that originally
Haha ? stripper born again virgin , maybe 5 dollar ? at best
Walk away…you deserve to be treated better than that.
He's being extremely unreasonable. He should be helping to nurse you back to health. Instead He's complaining about sex. You're not his personal masterbation device. If his sense of self of worth is this tied up in the amount of sex he has, he has bigger issues than being majorly inconsiderate of your health and general well being. Tell unless He's gonna help you get better he needs to leave you hell alone about sex.
Grow up.
He's guilt tripping you to be intimate with him. Gross. I wouldn't be eager to be with someone like that either. I'm sure you can try talking to him but sounds like he would just make it your fault.
That's gaslighting. 100%. She is disregarding your boundaries, acting against them and then she is justifying herself and her behaviours by making you feel like the weird/controlling one – this is pure disrespect and gaslight. Don't not be fooled, no matter how “logical” she may make it sound.
I understand that every relationship is not black or white and that sometimes she may make you feel good and happy – but those are moments that are being used, by her and/or by you (by overthinking) to keep you trapped in this relationship.
You absolutely deserve somebody who will respect you and support you and love you. If you feel you are not getting ALL of that from that person, regardless of how much you love them, you need to put yourself first, always, and get out of this relationship.
My tip is don't view this as a break-up, view this as you choosing yourself, you choosing to date yourself and not somebody else because you know you deserve more.
Bro call a lawyer, take custody of your child and send that lazy woman to where she came from
Thank you for the brutal honesty. I needed it. ❤️?
As someone who went through something similar to your wife could it be that the financial situation you are in is triggering her. I have CPTSD and sometimes things trigger me that aren’t necessarily in relation to what I went through, you can’t control it it just happens and if you are feeling controlled which the cost of living crisis is doing to people she could put that on you as you are the closest person to her. Could she self refer to talking therapy’s? They might be able to help her with what’s going on.
No info on their itinerary. If just based of Hawaii, then there is nothing absolutely wrong with it. If he went there with you, perhaps it will turn exotic and romantic, but with his mom?..nahhh
Why are you having an issue with the porn? But not have an issue with him being super selfish and not caring about your sexual pleasure at all. He rather has no sex than to make sex an enjoyable experience for you?
Someone who is this selfish in the bedroom can't be a caring and respectful partner outside of the bedroom. It shows that it's ingrained in his personality to only care about himself and to have a complete lack of empathy and care for you.
I swear the workplace might as well be a speed dating event. Almost every post I see about relationships and infidelity starts there.
does it really make sense though? i’ve heard of shared facebooks, not shared reddits??? especially since they’re almost exclusively asking for relationship advice about each other. it just doesn’t make sense
Kick him out.
He's a narcissist type of person and you should dump him.
I understand why you feel the way that you do, OP. It can be discouraging to feel as though a person you're interested in is not just as interested in you.
However, based on what you've shared, it seems like you're both fond of each other, and this was just a sub-optimal date. There were a lot of concealed, intense emotions at play.
Spend more time together in a variety of settings, and pay attention to how you both are around each other and around others (thoughts, behaviours, emotions, gut feelings). Write about it. Reflect on your feelings. Then see how you feel about him.
It can take some time to really get a feel for whether something is working or not.
Just my two-cents. You know you best.
Best of luck!
No what I thought said trans rights were human rights actually said women’s rights are human rights. The rest of it was the same. I’m a speed reader and I need knew glasses so it was probably just me misreading it. Maybe that’s why I got fewer dirty looks lol
To put it bluntly: I’m not sure he’s really all that great a catch, because he’s a cheater. Imagine how his girlfriend will feel when she finds out. Heartbroken, betrayed. He chose to do that, you know, both eyes open and all that. He could do it to you, too.
I just don’t want you to put him on a pedestal. He’s just a human being. And so are you. Nobody is perfect.
It’s good that you’re going to therapy. Probably the healthiest thing for you to do is to unwind your relationship with your boyfriend; he deserves to know, or at least you need to set things straight by leaving him. Try to work with your therapist on being comfortable alone, if it’s possible. The dynamic between you and your supervisor is deeply unhealthy, and I’m not surprised your mental health is suffering.
She lost me there. “You need to leave. Right now. Oh, I also put your Christmas presents in your car for you”. FTN. Talk about mixed messages.
There’s info missing here.
If it’s a libido difference that’s been discussed than You pestering her for sex should illicit such a response. You said you wanted it on nye. You never even said if she agreed. If you aren’t having sex regularly why would you think you could do it on demand?
Have you talked about it when you aren’t horny? What is your understanding of the reasons why she doesn’t want to be with you sexually? Why things are so strained? Has there been cheating? Does she have trauma? Have you been able to talk about it?? Have you seen a therapist?
No sex is not a reason to cheat. That’s just stupid. If it’s not working it’s not working and you should leave. If you two have never been on the same page sexually and it’s two years in then there is a problem worth leaving for. If you cannot communicate in order to understand what’s going on then you should leave.
Every second Friday. I make a day of it.
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Spend your time finding someone who wants to date you.
How do you handle your own insecurities?
You just manage my man. You just manage.
You simply have to.
What's the alternative?
Dump him.
And when he gets upset, tell him it’s because he can’t get rid of his past.
What a weird comment.
I’ve been to a few Al-Anon meetings but there are none locally so I have to do the zoom meetings and they’re not much help, I can’t connect the same over zoom as I can in person. He attends AA religiously and personally I disagree with some of their beliefs but it helps him so I don’t say anything. I guess maybe it was naive of me but I didn’t realize that him getting sober would become his entire personality. Just the constant commentary and ranting on anything that has to do with alcohol is so tiring that I feel on eggshells at some points
Well said.
Your tldr is just as long as… Nevermind.. ?
Why do you desire to stay with him? What is holding you to his apartment? Is he attractive? No other place to rent in the city? Like why?
You sound addicted to being miserable and having something to complain about. Like you're afraid of what your life would look like if you let yourself be happy. I stopped reading after your husband had a romantic date night with dinner & drinks at as classmates house and then swapped nudes with her on SnapChat.
Next time it might not be the wall he's punching.
This isn’t normal. I mean I’ve had arguments with my boyfriend about not answering the phone or not texting me back for hours but that was because a) i KNEW he wasn’t doing anything except playing Xbox or watching tv and b) i was asking him questions that I actually needed the answer to AND he didn’t pick up my phone call that was chasing the answer because i actually did need an answer asap.
And even though he has seriously messed some stuff up by not being responsive, i would never dream of setting him a “rule”!
We had a conversation about being respectful to each other and our time and having personal responsibility for yourself and making sure his phone isn’t on silent when he leaves work, but what more can you do?! People either listen and adapt and grow, or they don’t.
I mean… this rule of his isn’t practical for a start. What if you’re in the cinema with friends? What if yours driving? What if your phone runs out of battery or has no signal?
This is way way way too controlling and he needs to get over himself. If he is ever worried about you, he could call you like a grown up, not set you rules like a child.
Simple. “We are in a monogamous relationship. Sleeping with other people is cheating and grounds for break up”
How tf is wanting a monogamous partner to stay monogamous “crazy insecure girlfriend”
Jesus Christ.
Thank you, I appreciate that.
Have a more in depth conversation with him. Tell him you want to make sure you are both investing in a future together. Tell him you feel it would be best to have a clearer timeline and let him know what that would ideally look like for you. Make space for what he wants as well.
Couples do what they want. My bf and I are getting married at the end of the year and won't be cohabitating until we're husband and wife. My sister has had multiple long term relationships and for her moving in after 4-6 months is the norm. So, what do you want? What does he want? And how can both of those come together? Good luck!
Sounds like a feeder kink. I’d do my best to find out if that’s the case and if so start turning that shit down unless you want to end up 400lbs
It sounds like your mom needs some serious, time-consuming hobbies and some friends to go with them! Ugh that sounds so overbearing…
It's not, though. He never sent it. And he wasn't of sound mind when he wrote it.
I see no contradiction with the two points in your first paragraph. Being raped and getting pregnant is completely different from having consensual sex and getting pregnant.
Your bf is 22 now, so this might be a first for him. Tell him to celebrate his Eskimo brotherhood rather than fear it.
Couples fight and argue. 99% of them do. There will be future arguments, and so there will be future cheating, because lying to her friends and cheating on you is her solution to any problems she sees. Even if you don't fight, she will likely still be cheating and telling her friends lies. She can't be trusted.
It’s not weird to me that she sleeps in the bed, it’s just that he has the dog sleep under the same covers as us while we’re bare naked. I wouldn’t mind if she slept at the bottom of the bed or even on top of the covers, but he doesn’t even attempt to move her once she’s under the blankets.
But I do agree w/ everything else you said, I just don’t want something this stupid and small end up being the breaking point in our relationship.
Maybe he needs to be evaluated by a mental health professional
I think you found yourself one of those massage parlors.. in Europe at least there are more and more of these popping up where the workers give “extra service”. Booking an appointment at such a parlor is consenting to the extra service – since that's why people go there.
I would suggest you either stay away from Thai massage parlors or you check with them to make sure they don't offer extra service.
The fact is, you made the gamble without your wife's blessing,
That's actually not a fact. They were new in a relationship and only boyfriend/girlfriend and had separate finances. The risk was entirely OP's, and not the girlfriends. I didn't see if they'd married since then, but OP has clearly stated elsewhere that at the time he made this decision, this was the case. And that totally changes things. All risk was his, his girlfriend had no risk, and has reaped all the rewards. If OP had fallen flat on his face, she could have walked away from him at any time without any financial liability, just as she walked into the relationship.
Where are you getting that he’s not interested in meeting up?
I’m pretty sure that 11 weeks is the last point when you can use medication for the abortion. And even then, it will depend on ultrasound aging.
Medical abortion and medication abortion are not synonymous. Medical is usually used to denote an abortion that is not spontaneous.
You just did. Show her your post and go from there.
Right? I see a lot of people saying she’s crazy or something but she might just need a diagnosis and accommodations. Nothing she did is justified like she needs to learn how to cope when she’s feeling like that whether it’s autism or not.
Girl needs help, not a bf. If you value your life, get away from this unwell girl.
In your own words you’re pressuring her to call you more than she’d like to & she’s been short in response. That’s not jumping to a conclusion, it’s your own words.
Yes, tell her.
It's also because you don't have to do scheduled exercises like in high school, and yes it is all about diet, but young adults will want to continue eating like they did when active while their metabolism is reduced.
As a 34 year old I honestly can't tell the difference between teenagers and early 20s people. If he's seriously interested in a relationship then he is very likely to be controlling.
never said i did, read it again lol
I feel nauseous and so very sorry for your sisters
ok
That actually makes your betrayal so much worse. Your love is so cheap and transactional you would risk it for someone who doesnt even mean anything to you.
It is precisely for the reason you can’t tell if you’re raping someone or not that you shouldn’t buy sex. It’s wild to me that you’re using that as a way to justify it. If you’re taking the chance of raping someone you’re making an unethical choice.
I would call her on the lie… you can admit you opened the text or you can stew over why she lied…. I choose lie…
My reply would be 'I'm guessing it's because your easy honey, stop acting like you won a prize, I was done with him long before you slept with him, enjoy my cast offs?'
Yes, I'm certain they would force him to return it and they might even charge him. You can get the police to get a judge to issue a temporary restraining order fast as well. No way you should accept that situation…
Do you really see a future with her? She's nearly 30 and has never worked??
I think your initial statement rings true. It seems like he's been trying to pick fights in order to create a reason to justify breaking up with me. I've always treated him well, been understanding, and am generally a good woman, all of which he has said himself. But it's like he's trying to cut all of his ties in preparation for leaving the country, like closing his business, and pushing me away… Bc if I'm not here waiting for him, he can stay gone longer and travel freely without guilt.
Oh you fucked up good and now you've lost them all. See what happens when you're overbearing and act entitled to kids that aren't yours? Ha! You're disgusting and I hope you're happy with yourself.
There is so many things wrong with this I’m not even going to bother
You’re out of your mind if you do this
Well, it works how it's supposed to, you just aren't listening. If you have low libido you can't function like a high libido, so why trying?
If you keep pressuring yourself you're only gonna make it worse. And since you wanna have sex with your partner, instead beating yourself that much include him in it because in the end you want it because of him right?
Let him seduce you, make you feel open, practice and try, don't just expect it to show up when you think it should. That doesn't happen even to women with high libido.
Just say no thank you but I'll be happy to hang out after.
Don’t make excuses for him omfg. And what is with this sub and half the issues between people with ridiculous age gaps? Ma’am – you’re ENABLING a pervert. And making excuses! I am disgusted that you even said “there’s nothing illegal about it” to justify it. Gross.