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?Goal ?POV cam – Blowjob with saliva [193 tokens remaining]
Date: October 11, 2022
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Yeah she’s going to a therapist soon but its anxiety related, idk if im sane enough to be with someone that has so much work to do on themself. I have enough on my hands just working on myself.
No, not at all.
So you're happy to keep stringing him along when you want to “experience other people”. Girl just dump him and put him out of his misery. This isn't much of a relationship if you're thinking of being with other people.
yeah he knew, i told all of them at the beginning.
if she have two kids then she know how to deal with them and the sign of distress. also why isn’t she focus on getting the kids back to the country with herself then having new kids
I'd tell him the wedding's off. I can't trust or marry someone that is gonna lie to me every time I wouldn't like the truth!
oh my god. im so so sorry this has happened to you. that fucking SUCKS! (I was with someone for 5/6 years and found similar messages with multiple girls) i threw up when i read them.. all over the bed. like you, I had just checked his phone for the time and a notification popped up. whatever you do next is totally up to you op but please, do not! go back there. he will plead and tell you things will be different but they wont. they're only sorry when they get caught. I lost 5/6 years of my life and all of my confidence and self esteem. the cheating started a few months in but I stayed as I was struggling with a lot of things during that time. please dont be like me. confront him in a way that will make you feel dignified and dont let him worm his way back in. he doesnt deserve you AT ALL! sending all the love and hugs op, again, im so sorry this has happened to you.
He ruined their relationship when he chose to assault you. Cut contact with the person who gave you such bad advice too, that is not a friend.
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My ex was like this…honestly I would leave. It only gets worse with time
Because op did not know of their history beforehand lol.
Context changes perception, nothing new.
Definitely reflect on what happened. Maybe consider seeing a therapist with whom to work this through. Both why you left your ex boyfriend of 4 years so quickly, why you you got into a relationship with a toxic abuser, and, of course, to deal with the trauma you've suffered.
I feel that if you were so eager to leave your 4 year relationship for the new guy, there must have been something about the relationship that didn't work for you. Because it seems to me that if you were happy, you wouldn't have left your ex boyfriend in the first place.
Trying to get back together with your ex at this point is not a good idea because you may just be trying to not be alone. And right now, after what you came out of, that relationship is looking very good. Don't try to go back to him unless you're sure that you really want to be with him and not just be in a relationship.
Finally, even if you do decide to get back with your ex, you have to be prepared for him to not to want to get back together with you. It looks like you consider him a backup plan and that would make me, if I were him, feel like you're likely to leave again if someone you think is better comes along.
Good luck.
God damn, they barely changed the name of the account even, just changing the last word according to other posts. This person is unhinged
Her fears are justified
Maybe you need to have a conversation with him about it, let him know how you feel and ask some of those questions.
You meeting the other girl was a coincidence, EVERYTHING afterwards was a choice. I’m in a relationship myself and I know it’s not all roses and butterflies all the time. Relationships have high highs and low lows. And sometimes the lows can make you wonder if it’s all worth it. But I also respect my partner enough to not fuck someone else. I communicate with my partner. If you can’t go through life not fucking other people who you find attractive and interesting then you have no business being in a relationship at all. Because no matter how bad a relationship may be at some point, once you cheat there’s no going back. You’ve ruined your relationship.
With all due respect you’re no better than any other cheater. In other words, you’re an awful partner and it’s a shame your girlfriend is a victim of your behaviour. I’m sure you’re gonna keep minimising it and lying to your girlfriend and then shocked pikachu face when it eventually comes crashing down.
Go to a shelter and get help. Leave your cats. Save yourself.
I did talk to him! It's all in the post
He didn't manipulated you. You are manipulating yourself. You are fully responsible for your participation in this affair. You are confused because your self-image as a person with integrity conflicts with your actions of a person without integrity. But you do it to yourself, no one is responsible for it but you.
I just lost all sympathy
Do the romantic proposal with the picnic like you envisioned, have the conversation about getting engaged then and go ring-shopping together the following week.
You are just as damaged as she is…..FFS Turn off the location sharing.
Are you even reading u/Toroic’s comments?
The Autism will not vanish with therapy.
But it being detectable for others/ others bearing the consequences of Autism induced a-hole behaviour CAN be lessened.
I once have managed to get an Asperger autistic young man to actually figure out how the guy transformed into a bug feels in Kafkas “The Metamorphosis”.
They kind of “read” and mentally calculate/gues, but it is possible to be autistic and no overbearing ah as OPs crush is.
The Autism will not vanish with therapy.
But it being detectable for others/ others bearing the consequences of Autism induced a-hole behaviour CAN be lessened.
I once have managed to get an Asperger autistic young man to actually figure out how the guy transformed into a bug feels in Kafkas “The Metamorphosis”.
They kind of “read” and mentally calculate/gues, but it is possible to be autistic and no overbearing ah as OPs crush is.
I recommend you take a look at Attachment Theory. I wish I’d known about it at your age. I’m short, people respond to fear of rejection and abandonment in very similar ways, based on how our parents responded to our vulnerability as early as in our infancy. You’d be surprised how much it influences every little moment in a relationship, even the things that make you snap.
The second thing is, you’re both very young and probably need to develop your emotional intelligence still. This is normal. Emotional intelligence, if you don’t know, means being aware of what you’re feeling and learning how to communicate it. When you have that awareness, it changes a moment where you (or he) might make a passive aggressive comment into a moment of clear and direct conversation about what you’re feeling. Example: Maybe he doesn’t clean up something very well and you feel like it means he doesn’t care enough about you to put in the effort, so instead you send a barb his way to let him know it annoys you, when it would be much more productive to say, “hey, when you do X, I feel like it means Y and that hurts my feelings.” Then he can respond from an informed perspective instead of being made to feel small or guilty first.
Basically, you have to learn how to translate your feelings into direct communication. Outside of jokes, Sarcasm is really just indirect criticism, which is not the most mature way to express something and certainly doesn’t prioritize respect for your partner. It’s clear that you do respect and admire him, so I’d encourage you to learn to speak what you’re feeling. As my therapist told me many years ago, feelings are always okay no matter what, but if you don’t get them out in a healthy way, they will leak out wherever they can.
I recommend you take a look at Attachment Theory. I wish I’d known about it at your age. I’m short, people respond to fear of rejection and abandonment in very similar ways, based on how our parents responded to our vulnerability as early as in our infancy. You’d be surprised how much it influences every little moment in a relationship, even the things that make you snap.
The second thing is, you’re both very young and probably need to develop your emotional intelligence still. This is normal. Emotional intelligence, if you don’t know, means being aware of what you’re feeling and learning how to communicate it. When you have that awareness, it changes a moment where you (or he) might make a passive aggressive comment into a moment of clear and direct conversation about what you’re feeling. Example: Maybe he doesn’t clean up something very well and you feel like it means he doesn’t care enough about you to put in the effort, so instead you send a barb his way to let him know it annoys you, when it would be much more productive to say, “hey, when you do X, I feel like it means Y and that hurts my feelings.” Then he can respond from an informed perspective instead of being made to feel small or guilty first.
Basically, you have to learn how to translate your feelings into direct communication. Outside of jokes, Sarcasm is really just indirect criticism, which is not the most mature way to express something and certainly doesn’t prioritize respect for your partner. It’s clear that you do respect and admire him, so I’d encourage you to learn to speak what you’re feeling. As my therapist told me many years ago, feelings are always okay no matter what, but if you don’t get them out in a healthy way, they will leak out wherever they can.
Yes, that’s literally exactly it. There are a lot of ppl like this for some reason. It’s like we all have at least one girl friend that tries to pull this crap. I hade one in high school. She was only ever “interested” in the boys anyone in our friend group was dating. She was a boyfriend stealer, but only bc she had something to prove. She didn’t actually care about the guys and dumped them quickly lol
Major self esteem issues. You and your boyfriend need to go completely no contact !!! And if she doesn’t respect it, threaten a restraining order.
Sorry that was a joke about red flags. That being said, be careful. Emotional abusers tend to use therapy as a weapon. But I hope it helps you guys
Sounds like your BF is finding out how shallow you are, and doesn’t like it.
UpdateMe!
Petty, immature, self-centered…this behavior is troublesome. You could stop doing your part of the cleaning, so he sees how much you actually do. Have you talked to him about any of this? I'd tell him the behavior is hurtful and you need him to understand that you work two jobs, make the beds, do the dishes, etc., and you need him to be more understanding and how his passive-aggressive tests are making you feel.
Look at that textbook gaslighting. Ex boyfriend has managed to convince this poor young lady that she is CRAZY, rather than perfectly justified.
OP, I'm exhausted just reading about your relationship. I can't imagine how you must be feeling!
Your worth is not dependent on your relationship with him. You have so much going on in your life. You are a Mom! You are hard working ! You got a good life being made for you and your son. You need to cut out anyone in your life that treats you with so much toxicity. Keeping this up is also not a good look for your child who looks up to you. See if you can get some therapy, because you need to rebuild your sense of self worth. Everything you are building around you are signs that even if you “fail”, you can rebuild yourself. You need to redirect that sense of hope into something that's positive and will help you better yourself. If you're scared of being alone, you aren't. I'm sure you have loved ones around you.
As a woman who had a coworker very interested in me not long ago, I can assure you that “I have a boyfriend” almost never works to make a guy go away. The dude even met my partner and had the audacity to ask me out a day after meeting him. Might also add, he has a girlfriend.
So yes, you're tripping lol, but you're excused, you'll learn one day that women often have to “find excuses” for the unsolicited interest they might receive from men, because a lot of the time, being honest as “I'm not interested” or “I have a boyfriend”, just doesn't work out in most of those cases.
If she didn't give him an excuse about the snap being laggy he would just show up the next day to her work and ask her why she didn't add him. You don't seem to give a fuck about her or the fact that this dude is clearly crossing boundaries. All you care about is yourself and your fragile ego because she didn't say that she had a boyfriend which would've been useless anyway. He clearly doesn't care about cheating so why would he care about you.
Everyone in the comments is telling you you're wrong and why but you do not care so why are you here? I hope that your girlfriend sees this as a red flag and leaves you.
This is unfortunate but true. I knew of a friend who earned significantly more than her ex and when they parted even though she had full custody she had to pay him alimony. Freaking garbage if you ask me.
You don’t like it? I wouldn’t tolerate that for a second. Why are you? He’s cussing at you and calling you names. Not okay. Ever. We teach people how to treat us. You have taught him that it’s okay to do this because you stayed after the first time. Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me.
We tackle everything as a team, and when one person is unable to do stuff the other picks up the slack. And not at all, I have empathy for him for everything else and still find him attractive in general – I meant in the moment when we are discussing this. It’s foreign for our personal relationship dynamic for strictly only one of us to do a task or activity. I love him deeply, I’m just rather frustrated about this issue because he is missing out on so much fun with our daughter and I would also like to be able to swim myself, which requires another adult to be there. Hope that clears things up
If you truly believe that, then you should also accept that this is likely a death sentence for many relationships and that’s on the father.
You have all got it wrong. The test should be a standard part of healthcare, for the child's sake, not the parents. Children have a right to be sure of their DNA lineage, for medical reasons
So your relationship is based on her lying to u and being comfortable enough to go as far as brag about it to u…. yea… thats a hard pass…. what else is she lying about or WILL she lie about in the future… “I swear im not fucking my coworker, i promise.”
Yyyyyikes I hope he runs away from you hella fast.
I've told him that plenty of times, even before this disaster. He just tells me it matters to him and to respect that. Which is probably why he is so upset with me. I just didn't think his brother was going to say anything.
I hear ya – you are quite a nice person. I am more used to AITA posts where it’s like I cut my parents off they might die of hunger but I feel I don’t owe them anything, etc. They should appreciate you much more than they do it seems. Any chance you can pull your mother away from your father? She might be another victim here.