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Date: October 25, 2022
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I'd be blunt, and I have a feeling this conversation has happened before. She's 55 do I doubt everyone has just dealt with her bs for that long without any complaints.
If you want to have it yourself you are just going to have to tell her, in one of your calls or in person you interrupt her and make her listen to what you have to say. But I warn you, she won't like it, and might take it as you being mean too.
Side note, you might want to ask your mom about the relationship between your aunt and her siblings. And maybe ask her for advice on how to approach the subject
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You don't. Your family is controlling. They're not right. They're absolutely in the wrong for this.
“We invested too much money in you” that right there shows you that you have no autonomy with them. They own you.
That's a disgusting mindset to have. And they're not going to change their mind. If anything, they'll just get worse.
Fat shaming you? Screaming at you? Telling you not to date someone bc they're lower class?
Bruh. They're wrong for ALL OF THIS. This is not how you treat someone you love.
No, you don’t need that shit.
Move on. There are billions of people out there, three years is nothing.
Don’t waste any more time on this sad excuse of a “partner”.
Why risk your entire happiness and life on someone MAYBE changing (when they’ve proved they’re already shitty), when you can start again with someone new who isn’t shitty in the first place?
I'm in the boat that guys and girls can be friends. Invite her to hang with you and your wife.
Because she's already in a position where she is fearing for her safety and we are taught, from a very young age, that if a man is making you scared, you need to NOT make him more angry. The same reason you give a theif with knife your money…its the safest option. Not exactly difficult to understand, the victim blaming is quite unnecessary.
•Why didn't you speak up and say we're not engaged what's going on?
•Was this your 1st conversation on marriage?
•Where does she stand on marriage and where do you stand on marriage?
•Is this reflective of how you two communicate?
Doesn't seem like you two are compatible if you can't together together if you want to get married, when, and then stick to the timeline with a proposal you both agree happened.
If you plan to live together and share finances then you need to discuss it before moving in. However, I don’t think you need to share everything with him. I don’t think he needs to know how much you have saved up, it’s not his business. The last thing you want is for him to find out you saved a lot of money and then he’s expecting you to help with his debt.
I'd suggest one last thing. Try reaching out yourself, instead of waiting for him to reach out to you. It sounds like he will come around when you reach out to him. Maybe he is just caught up with other stuff and finds it difficult to reach out to you himself unless its something he considers important.
Like I said man, I don't think you should actively end a friendship outright, but if the friendship dwindles out for a while then let it, he might come around after a while too
As I found in my last relationship, I could never be okay with a partner purposely spending a lot of alone time with an ex (same sex or otherwise) unless there are excruciating circumstances. They either are cheating on you or aren’t cheating but don’t care that the situation they put you in is causing you stress. And for what? A play date with a past romantic connection? That’s how little she thinks of your emotional safety OP. This is just the start. You deserve better.
Thank you very much.
Yes, I was leaning towards something like this. Good to know that I'm not over reacting with my instinct.
I will also absolutly talk with him about therapy. Maybe as a couple.
Thanks, I'll try not to!
Yeah, I know, I told you to do it. lol