You need to breathe and ask yourself if you trust her or not. Do you trust her ? If yes, then you need to understand that those thoughts are indeed scary, but probably not the truth. It's okay to be scared lf things, especially when we found a person we admire. But if you're together, it's bc you two took the decision to be together. So it mean she knows you have some good things in you. If she thinks you're a burden, she's smart enough to take decision. That's not the case. Ppl just don't have relationship with ppl they find ennoying just for fun, believe me.
If you don't trust her, you need to ask yourself why. Is it because you feel like you're not good enough? Is it because of the LDR ? Because she already broke your trust once ?
In any case, talk to her. Communicate. Choose wisely your words tho. Just don't go straight to her telling that you think she's gonna go away. Just tell her about your fear. Tell her how you feel worried, not bc you do not trust her but bc you love her so you're anxious abt loosing her (if it's the case, if it's bc you don't trust her, you also need to adress the problem). Depending on how she reacts you'll know if you're overthinking or not. But I do think you are, probably because you feel unsecure.
But it's okay my dude, we've all been there. It's gonna get better believe me ! And u'll be less if you speak your mind !
You can't call Jordan a misogynist if you want people to think misogynist means hating women. He loves and respects women. That's like calling Jesus a misogynist. Or Gandi a racist.
I don't know best, but I know to do my own research. I hope you find your answer. Still think you did amazing by not lashing out.
You can't control what you feel but you can choose what you do.
“Can't control feelings” is just a shitty excuse for cheating. “But honey, I couldn't control myself.”
Everyone's already told you what you should do, you just don't like it. If you actually cared for and respected him, you would leave him or stop cheating (though I think you should leave him the F alone).
Sounds like your boys going through a rough patch, we can't always be on our game all the time. Just try supporting him, maybe throw some compliments at him to try cheer him up.
“Why don't you loosen up when I claim that you're cheating on me and trying to trap me with someone else's baby even though I have absolutely no evidence nor reason to believe you've been unfaithful?”
Your girlfriend needs therapy. And she needs a reality check on…reality. Anyone could become abusive at any time. That's kind of why you are vulnerable in relationships. The person can hurt you (mentally, physically, emotionally), and you have to trust that they won't. And you try to find people who won't. That's sort of the whole thing of it.
She is looking for some sort of imaginary safety net to protect against future behavior. That doesn't exist…yet.
So either your husband has a bowel issue, or your toilet is partially clogged somewhere
I have clogged a toilet exactly twice in the past 10 years – and it was partially because the chain on the flusher was very loose and didn't drain properly
that's absolutely disgusting, and honestly – I'd be lvid.
What do you mean you've “caught her”? Are you actively walking in on her in the shower to see if she's peeing? How do you regularly manage to walk in at the exact moment of the pee?
Honestly based on what you put in your post i think if you don’t reach out she is going to be mad with you for not doing it. It seems she always wants the opposite of what you think she wants. I would send her a long message telling her how you feel and thats it. One message is not going to do any harm.
When you get married, he should put half the house in your name. Until then, rent is the simplest agreement. Another arrangement is for you to agree to pay half of upkeep and property tax while you live there. So if the HVAC goes out, you pay half. If the roof leaks, you pay half. If the siding needs paint, you pay half. See why rent is simpler? fwiw this situation expedited our wedding – we needed new hvac and I said if we were married I would buy half of it. Suddenly he thought a summer wedding sounded like a great idea lol
You need to breathe and ask yourself if you trust her or not. Do you trust her ? If yes, then you need to understand that those thoughts are indeed scary, but probably not the truth. It's okay to be scared lf things, especially when we found a person we admire. But if you're together, it's bc you two took the decision to be together. So it mean she knows you have some good things in you. If she thinks you're a burden, she's smart enough to take decision. That's not the case. Ppl just don't have relationship with ppl they find ennoying just for fun, believe me.
If you don't trust her, you need to ask yourself why. Is it because you feel like you're not good enough? Is it because of the LDR ? Because she already broke your trust once ?
In any case, talk to her. Communicate. Choose wisely your words tho. Just don't go straight to her telling that you think she's gonna go away. Just tell her about your fear. Tell her how you feel worried, not bc you do not trust her but bc you love her so you're anxious abt loosing her (if it's the case, if it's bc you don't trust her, you also need to adress the problem). Depending on how she reacts you'll know if you're overthinking or not. But I do think you are, probably because you feel unsecure.
But it's okay my dude, we've all been there. It's gonna get better believe me ! And u'll be less if you speak your mind !
You can't call Jordan a misogynist if you want people to think misogynist means hating women. He loves and respects women. That's like calling Jesus a misogynist. Or Gandi a racist.
I don't know best, but I know to do my own research. I hope you find your answer. Still think you did amazing by not lashing out.
You can't control what you feel but you can choose what you do.
“Can't control feelings” is just a shitty excuse for cheating. “But honey, I couldn't control myself.”
Everyone's already told you what you should do, you just don't like it. If you actually cared for and respected him, you would leave him or stop cheating (though I think you should leave him the F alone).
I love having time to myself.
I'm an introvert myself! I fully understand needing to recharge. In general, I'm the person in the relationship that is too independent lol
It's very strange and I'm just tired. The other foot is almost completely out of the door at this point
Sounds like your boys going through a rough patch, we can't always be on our game all the time. Just try supporting him, maybe throw some compliments at him to try cheer him up.
if your “friend” is more important than your gf, you don't need a gf. Have fun with her. It was nice to have know you.
If you can't even ask for it, break up. You're clearly too young for dating.
“Why don't you loosen up when I claim that you're cheating on me and trying to trap me with someone else's baby even though I have absolutely no evidence nor reason to believe you've been unfaithful?”
Lol. This is absurd.
Your girlfriend needs therapy. And she needs a reality check on…reality. Anyone could become abusive at any time. That's kind of why you are vulnerable in relationships. The person can hurt you (mentally, physically, emotionally), and you have to trust that they won't. And you try to find people who won't. That's sort of the whole thing of it.
She is looking for some sort of imaginary safety net to protect against future behavior. That doesn't exist…yet.
So either your husband has a bowel issue, or your toilet is partially clogged somewhere
I have clogged a toilet exactly twice in the past 10 years – and it was partially because the chain on the flusher was very loose and didn't drain properly
that's absolutely disgusting, and honestly – I'd be lvid.
What do you mean you've “caught her”? Are you actively walking in on her in the shower to see if she's peeing? How do you regularly manage to walk in at the exact moment of the pee?
Curious of the logistics here.
I agree, some of the best advice here I've seen. OP Explained the issues very clearly as well. I think all should be commended. ??
Honestly based on what you put in your post i think if you don’t reach out she is going to be mad with you for not doing it. It seems she always wants the opposite of what you think she wants. I would send her a long message telling her how you feel and thats it. One message is not going to do any harm.
The fact you call it simping seems unhealthy
In this case for you: “boundary” = “rules your SO has to follow”
When you get married, he should put half the house in your name. Until then, rent is the simplest agreement. Another arrangement is for you to agree to pay half of upkeep and property tax while you live there. So if the HVAC goes out, you pay half. If the roof leaks, you pay half. If the siding needs paint, you pay half. See why rent is simpler? fwiw this situation expedited our wedding – we needed new hvac and I said if we were married I would buy half of it. Suddenly he thought a summer wedding sounded like a great idea lol