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If the cheating was the cause of his depression he didn't mention that in the OP. He chose to take her back, work through it and have a child with her afterwards. OP seems to suggest it's not about that but he can clarify if he wants here.
And even if it was that, admitting he treated her like shit for the past span of time and then being shocked when she's leaving is… something else.
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Just putting it out there: being obese will have you feeling miserable, tired, and sore 24/7.
That being said, it was pretty hurtful what she said and how she said it. I’m sorry that you had to hear something that is evidently a blow to your self esteem, especially given your past and your self confidence issues.
I would encourage anyone who is obese to get healthy, for you. If she wants to be part of your support system while you do that, awesome! But you owe it to yourself to lose weight for your own quality of life. You don’t have to be perfectly in shape, muscular, etc in order to be healthy. A healthy diet (while allowing yourself treats now and then) and even moderate exercise go a long way! You are worth it.
Leave him he is a mega douche.