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Date: December 24, 2022
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Personally I would simply avoid touching her when out no matter what she asks.
You seem more concerned about being right. I would be so happy to know that my sister’s fiance is not a POS… just frecking apologize. You know he could go to jail, right?
I dont have endo. My husband still wouldn't throw a strop if I said no. He kisses me on the forehead then goes about his day.
If youve been around since he was born and for 3 years, yes you should be a decent human being and have a conversation with a kid. Idk how someone an raise a kid for 3 years since birth then coldly go NC.
I agree
There's something different between “I don't think we're long term compatible” and “you're not wife material”.
No, If only one person feels this way it would not work. I think it could work if both parties felt that way though imo.
Hm, interesting… I just checked and there's some stuff that can be ordered, but it doesn't seem like anything “cold” (frozen food, joghurt…) is available. And fruits just in huge quantities, more than I could ever eat in a week. Smallest amount I saw was 3kg apples. So I don't think that's what you mean and what you have overseas.
Because the point is that they aren’t interested. It doesn’t actually matter whether they’re dating, married, or lying.
I have a 0 tolerance to cheating, and I 100% believe he isn't the type. He already knows I would leave without question.
Also with anxiety, sometimes no matter the amount of reassurance your brain will stil mess with you!
Reddit and it's hypocrisy. I promise you if this post had been made by her and she was the one who was celibate, she'd be told “you don't need a reason to break up, you had a right to save yourself blah blah”. Instead, the people here are giving you a lecture about why saving yourself is a problem.
This woman married you under false pretenses. She knew way before the wedding that she was checked out but the thought of missing out on her “princess day” outweighed your feelings. She's a selfish human. She's deceitful and the best thing you will do for yourself is to get rid of her for good. Don't grovel for her crumbs. Do you really think she also kept celibate in the 3 yrs you were dating because she was so in love and waiting for you? I doubt it. Let her go.
At 23 I didn’t have shit in common with people who were in high school or had recently graduated because they’re wildly different stages of life and maturity.
That says far more about you than anyone else. I'm friends with a psychology prof and we literally laughed about this the other day “What is wrong with people [at any age] that they are incapable of having a conversation with a younger person. In fact, I can't think of any age which I couldn't have a conversation with”.
I can find common ground and talk to absolutely anyone for hours. Are you proposing that this is unusual and that people should be chastised and shunned for it? That's fucking wild.
I think there are a lot of issues with age of consent laws, and I think raising them without many many other changes would be incredibly harmful. But laws don’t take nuance or your personal situation into account, they can’t which is why legality doesn’t always equate to morality and my focus in this conversation is the moral aspect.
It doesn't… really matter what he responds with at this point. You don't trust him, and that's the problem. He's probably given you other reasons not to trust him: the kind of thing that gave you reason to look in the condom drawer.
You don't trust him because you know he's cheating on you. I'm sorry that you're going through this. Take your time, and keep it together.
Why can't you leave your rapist boyfriend?
On the surface, I’d say to just let this go and give it time. You made a joke, it didn’t land, and you apologized. There should be nothing more that needs to happen.
However, clearly there’s something else behind this. I can only guess at the inferences he’s making though because you didn’t give us a lot of detail. Why is it so gross to joke about sex? Why does he think it’s disrespectful? Does he think your past sexual behavior is gross and disrespectful? Is he repulsed by bodily fluids? Is he so insecure that he can’t deal with the fact that you’ve had sex with other people before?
The part that’s weird to me here is that you made a joke you thought was funny and then when your boyfriend didn’t like it you totally spun out and reversed course, like of course he would think that was gross and you never should have joked about it and you really messed up. There’s something about that dynamic that feels odd to me but I can’t quite put my finger on it. The only two explanations I can come up with are 1) your humor is a consistent sticking point and you know your bf doesn’t like gross out jokes but you make them constantly anyway to provoke him on purpose, which makes you a jerk. Or 2) your bf regularly has such over the top responses to your innocuous comments that he’s trained you to immediately bend over backwards asking for forgiveness every time he gets upset, which makes him a jerk. Does either of those patterns sound familiar?
I wish you all the best! Good luck!
This all sounds very suspicious but if he was really going to cheat would he really be stupid enough to do it in the house next door? But going out for a drive and disappearing for hours. That definitely is suspect. Can you not have him followed and see where he goes.
He sounds like a selfish immature boy that only thinks of himself.
You can do better. Even at your age there are young men who are more mature and more caring.
Of the car you mean?
The child is the biggest loser in this scenario. Neither parent seems to want her around. I hope you can extricate yourself quickly and without financial repercussions.
This guy is totally gas-lighting you. 100% he was outside getting high.
He did go outside to do it. He could be hiding it from more than one person. Please wake up.
That's not really fair. I don't agree with OP's stance but as a victim of sexual abuse the only person I cuddle is my daughter. Pretty much any physical contact with other people makes me very uncomfortable. Even growing up, none of my friends cuddled. It just wasn't a thing.
She may not have cheated but I wouldn’t stay with someone who invited there ex over to drink to while I was away. That’s not victim blaming. That’s someone who may intended to cheat but didn’t go through with it and then was assaulted in the process
In Texas, you can drink in a bar at 18 with a parent.
I mean, yes. They want to be friends but there’s always an undercurrent of maybe she will have sex. I don’t understand why women think platonic relationships with healthy heterosexual men actually exist.
I mean, that has nothing to do with the argument here, but ok? She is using her words to say she wants a divorce. She doesn’t owe OP an explanation. Would it be nice? Sure. Doesn’t change anything though.
Let me make this clear for you: when he said he was bored he doesn’t mean that he was like.. tired of scrolling Reddit.
He was bored of you and is window shopping for your replacement.
He’s 31. He knew exactly what he was doing.
Don’t tolerate this behaviour. You can do better.
He shouldn’t be putting a hand on you, PERIOD. It doesn’t matter what his intentions were, how hard it was, whether or not it was on purpose, etc. He never should have even raised a hand at you in the first place. Why tf do you think this sort of behaviour is okay? Because it’s fucking not. Not ever.
I must be abit confused here but may I ask how it’s manipulation please
Nah. I’m pretty open to criticism and I’ll correct myself if need be. I wouldn’t call myself needy, but I don’t like being alone and I spend a lot of time w my bf. Everything he said was valid, I just wished he told me in a less blunt way when I was upset. I was just feeling really lonely during quarantine. My bf is my best friend so we joke around and give each other plenty of feedback/advice