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Jasmine & Brad, y.o.
Location: United States
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Online Live Sex Chat rooms Jasmine & Brad
Date: January 4, 2023
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OP is an asshole along with her asshole bf. Your “jokes” are unfunny and cringe. GROW UP.
Info: how does your mom know about your relationship with your dad and his new family? Via FB or other SM? Do you tell her about it? Do they have friends or family in common who might share?
Also it sounds like you have never given him any real consequences for his behavior. If you don’t have the courage to actually leave him like you should, you need to at least give him strong consequences for his behavior.
Consequences aren’t things you tell/ask him to do (like asking him to talk to her less), they are things YOU do and control. I would leave and stay with family if I saw him chatting with her and I would literally ignore hubby until he contacted me telling me what he was going to do to fix the situation (“I want you to come home, I blocked her on discord and informed my friends that I won’t game with them anymore “).
Why would he choose you when you are letting him have both of you. Take yourself away.
They hadn’t chosen at all yet and were acting as single people
Well I haven’t told him and he hasn’t really noticed. My reaction lasts a second and he usually thinks it’s just because he startled me. I know all these comments are panicking but I don’t have any other symptoms and I don’t have this problem with anyone else. I will see a doctor, but I think it may be a trauma related response from hyper vigilance following some past abuse.
Thank you for the concern!
If putting people in their place is so important to you, why don't you do it? You're spending all this time laying down waiting for others to to stand up for you. Stand up for yourself. Knock em dead, champ
When you went into your Open era did you not have discussions about rules, boundaries and outcomes?
If you didn't want children then 'No children' should have been up there alongside a plan as to what would happen if she got pregnant.
Where's the accountability? “We're not really sure who the father is, though” – this shouldn't happen. There's always the risk of an STI so how are you to track and be responsible for sex-related happenings if no one knows anything? There should at least be a very small pool of known, contactable people.
To answer the question, I think that yes – YWBTA if you leave now. The time for that has passed. When she came to you and said 'I'm pregnant' that was the moment for this discussion – “Abortion or I walk”. By now you've left her with the notion that you'd be staying and that will have had an effect on her decision-making.
You can always go, no one can stop you, but YTA if you do. I'm my opinion, people who do not want to be parents should not be parents because the damage that emotional neglect can do to kids is horrendous so if you're convinced that this is not for you then you'd best just suck it up and go.
I’m sorry your going through this op. How has his behavior changed? Is he working more hours or being gone more often? Or is he irritable and jumpy? Or all of the above? Maybe it doesn’t matter, but it sounded like blackmail until folks started mentioning the sugar potential.
Gather evidence but if he is giving her money (regardless of sugar baby or blackmail), definitely watch any account he has access to that will affect you as well. Credit, banks accounts, savings, retirement, etc. Whatever the reason, he is giving her large sums and is already overstepping a boundary.
I think a couple of things will help to keep in mind here.
First, if he's the perfect guy but can't balance work and life enough to have a relationship with you, then he's not the perfect guy.
I'm not condemning him as a person – this kind of thing definitely happens, it's understandable. But the fact is this would be different if the thing taking up all his time and attention was out of his control – like being a parent, having a chronic illness, caring for an ailing family member, dealing with legal trouble, etc. All of that would understandably have to take precedence, and he'd have no choice but to deal with those things first, which could (but not always) leave no room for a relationship.
But this situation was his choice. He's the one making himself busy with this. There's nothing wrong with that if that's his lifelong dream, but it's still a choice. If he wanted a relationship right now, he could choose to pump the brakes a little bit, even just enough to make time to see you on the weekends. The fact that he has created a schedule in which there's no time for you, when he technically didn't have to, says that he prioritizes his work goals to the exclusion of other goals. It's absolutely his prerogative, but that's only one possible option out of many, and he chose it.
What would it be like, realistically, to be in a relationship long-term wiith somebody like that? What if his business fell through and he decided to try all over again, when you two were already married? What if you decided to have a family, and then he saw an opportunity to make big career moves right when you were having a kid? It sounds like he's the kind of guy who can't multitask – by his own admission, he's all or nothing. That means that when you're priority 1, you get all – and when you're priority 2, you get nothing.
I'm not saying he's a bad person for this. And maybe it wouldn't be like this forever, and that this time in his life is just a fluke. But he's 31. That's old enough to establish patterns, and understand your own habits and priorities. I wouldn't bet on him changing. So I'd think very hard about whether you can manage to be with someone who can't make time for his loved ones, at all, when he's focused on any other goal. Because you won't always be the goal.
With that said: I don't think you should wait around for this guy. Consider his little talk with you to be an answer given: he's made his choice. That doesn't mean you have to shut him out completely, or that trying again in the future is off the table entirely. But assume for now that it isn't going to happen, and pursue what makes you happy. Your life won't wait for anyone else. It will happen to you whether or not he's there.
Perfect response Fucking 10/10
Dam that sounds frustrating, definitely an obsession and bordering on unhealthy at that, you say you've indulged them for years? And it hasn't helped ease any of it? This is very deep-seated stuff then.
Nothing wrong a with a kink or two but relationships are about give and take; it's not healthy for it to go too far one way or the other.
Calmly reassert your boundaries I say, it's not unreasonable to not want to be bombarded by anything.
Random, but I'm the mom in your scenario. I'm married with two kids, but the eldest has a biodad in a different country. Kiddo is hitting preteens, and I'm terrified he'll decide to move away to his dad. I will have to let him go, and it absolutely breaks my heart. At least I know he will be so loved, and well taken care for.
Yeap, I get it, fancy word play on his part
Ditch the bitch ASAP.
She is using you, dont be an idiot.