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Jane Sucks, 19 y.o.
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Date: January 2, 2023
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Agree with the first part of your reply, hard disagree with the second part. Once again, it can cause ptsd. Ptsd (or just trauma) can last for years and years even with therapy to help aid someone.
Someone being actively heavily affected by ptsd (or just trauma) for years isn't them “making a choice to continue to be unhappy”, and that's such a nasty thing to say lol. Cheating is a choice, being traumatized long-term because someone was cheated on is not.
I'm not saying OP's mom is in the right for making an ultimatum (she isn't in the right), but it's pretty callous to say that someone not being able to move past the emotional pain in the time frame that you think they should is a “choice”.
Choking you and pinning you down is physical, violent assault.
Stop making excuses and get yourself to safety.
she honestly sounds pretty terrible, and while it sucks you aren't together because you love her, i think the bullet dodged you in this case.
just focus on yourself and work on yourself and work toward your goals. You'll get your swagger back in no time and forget all about her. There's nothing sexier to the opposite sex than somebody actively working toward their best life.