LMAOOOOO not you accusing people of lacking emotional intelligence because they don’t agree women need to be dragged out of parties for being drunk without hurting anyone/being sick/being alone/needing help/passing out, when you’ve been literally mansplaining sexual assault to women (including survivors), who all agree that OP was being controlling. You have no empathy for women yourself if you’re refusing to listen to hundreds of them agreeing this was controlling and violent. If he wanted to make sure she was safe, he could have asked to come or asked her to call him at a certain time, then considered coming if she doesn’t call. This was an act of control, because he didn’t want his 19 year old girlfriend to party with her friends.
If you are both committed to forgiveness and having a healthy relationship, you need to forgive yourself. Forgiveness is not the same thing as complacency. You have accepted what happened. Moving forward, you work to prevent reoccurance, and you commit to being as happy/healthy as possible.
Becoming complacent means you see the signs of situations that led to the past abuse, and you ignore those signs under the philosophy that it's never going to happen again simply because you went to therapy in the past.
if my partner gained or lost 15-20 pounds in one month i would be more worried about some sort of medical issue than attraction. even for the most sedentary people, that’s a pretty abnormal change for such a short timeframe. if you’re not wildly exaggerating the amount of her weight gain, i dont think it would he unreasonable for you to show concern for her health
If it took a year, she was hammered, and it's only because she thought she was literally being taken advantage of, this isn't a bad situation
She's not an abuser.
My ex slapped the fuck outta me about ten separate times and physically tried to punch me and had to be restrained about five other times when she was drunk
I’m sober. That was a super shitty thing she did. Are you still in therapy? If not, go back.
But he's not working now and not contributing. It doesn't really matter what happened before, its about what is happening in this moment.
LMAOOOOO not you accusing people of lacking emotional intelligence because they don’t agree women need to be dragged out of parties for being drunk without hurting anyone/being sick/being alone/needing help/passing out, when you’ve been literally mansplaining sexual assault to women (including survivors), who all agree that OP was being controlling. You have no empathy for women yourself if you’re refusing to listen to hundreds of them agreeing this was controlling and violent. If he wanted to make sure she was safe, he could have asked to come or asked her to call him at a certain time, then considered coming if she doesn’t call. This was an act of control, because he didn’t want his 19 year old girlfriend to party with her friends.
If you are both committed to forgiveness and having a healthy relationship, you need to forgive yourself. Forgiveness is not the same thing as complacency. You have accepted what happened. Moving forward, you work to prevent reoccurance, and you commit to being as happy/healthy as possible.
Becoming complacent means you see the signs of situations that led to the past abuse, and you ignore those signs under the philosophy that it's never going to happen again simply because you went to therapy in the past.
What did she think co-parenting was going to entail? You talking shit and being mean to your son’s mother?
if my partner gained or lost 15-20 pounds in one month i would be more worried about some sort of medical issue than attraction. even for the most sedentary people, that’s a pretty abnormal change for such a short timeframe. if you’re not wildly exaggerating the amount of her weight gain, i dont think it would he unreasonable for you to show concern for her health
If it took a year, she was hammered, and it's only because she thought she was literally being taken advantage of, this isn't a bad situation
She's not an abuser.
My ex slapped the fuck outta me about ten separate times and physically tried to punch me and had to be restrained about five other times when she was drunk
These two things are very, very far apart.