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hot dance, ♥ [GOAL MET]
Date: February 12, 2023
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hot dance, ♥ [GOAL MET]
Well, if she’s just avoiding you because of that, I think you should leave her alone. There’s nothing else to be done about it if they’re not cheating. You didn’t do anything you can’t fix it. What are you gonna do break up with your boyfriend? She’ll go after him. Just leave it alone and let her find somebody else spend some time on her own. Make some other friends with different people. You don’t want a friend that would go after your boyfriend anyway, I also wouldn’t talk about it a ton with your boyfriend just let it be.
Id be honest. Its still early in your relationship. Don't waste time on something or someone when your hearts not 100% in it.
Well, if she’s just avoiding you because of that, I think you should leave her alone. There’s nothing else to be done about it if they’re not cheating. You didn’t do anything you can’t fix it. What are you gonna do break up with your boyfriend? She’ll go after him. Just leave it alone and let her find somebody else spend some time on her own. Make some other friends with different people. You don’t want a friend that would go after your boyfriend anyway, I also wouldn’t talk about it a ton with your boyfriend just let it be.
Yeah, the problem isn't that he's not willing to commit to a lifetime with her and those issues, the problem is that he hid that vital information from her to scam her into continuing a relationship with him even though he has no intention of marrying her. He's happy to use her until he can't handle her anxiety anymore and then he'll blindside dump her.
It's pretty clear that he just wants her to sit quietly in the corner and wait for him to be less busy which I guess most likely translates to being there when he wants sex.
I get being busy with school and prioritising your education, and I also get that some people have to work full time to make that happen.
But what's with the multiple bands? That sounds like way too much commitment and an easy place to cut down and get more free time.
The question is if he's willing to do that since he seems to be taking his girlfriend for granted.
If this guy doesn't learn to balance things and understand that relationships takes time and effort to work then he will continue to find himself in this situation.
She is in error, but probably doesn't care. She can contact him, you just leave if she does
She can move across the country or to a new one… you might not come with.
She can light someone on fire, but she will go to prison.
She can cling to you and declare you her future… but you might marry her if she does.
All actions have consequences. Cause leads to effect.
Maybe Keep the hair in a box in the garage not the sugar drawer.
So either your husband has a bowel issue, or your toilet is partially clogged somewhere
I have clogged a toilet exactly twice in the past 10 years – and it was partially because the chain on the flusher was very loose and didn't drain properly
that's absolutely disgusting, and honestly – I'd be lvid.
So either your husband has a bowel issue, or your toilet is partially clogged somewhere
I have clogged a toilet exactly twice in the past 10 years – and it was partially because the chain on the flusher was very loose and didn't drain properly
that's absolutely disgusting, and honestly – I'd be lvid.
So either your husband has a bowel issue, or your toilet is partially clogged somewhere
I have clogged a toilet exactly twice in the past 10 years – and it was partially because the chain on the flusher was very loose and didn't drain properly
that's absolutely disgusting, and honestly – I'd be lvid.
Op listen to this. Go for your wife’s sake. I would tell her beforehand that you are going for her. However, if things get heated you will bow out. Stay in the background and If her dad starts in on you, let your wife know and that you will come back to pick her up. This way you tried your best.
It's the “oh no, I could never be caught dead going to places other people like” for me… she sounds like a majorly unlikeable asshole. OP isn't even enjoying this, and honestly I think he's too good for this kind of BS, almost everyone is. I think his “lover” needs to find someone else to crawl up her anus with her and leave this man alone.
When she talks about it, I bring up how it still feels like cheating and since its a woman and shes a woman, its not a big deal.
Wrong. It’s a big deal to you, and she’s ignoring your concerns. Time for marriage counseling because this isn’t going to resolve itself on its own.
I understand that , obvious he's miserable everyday and having to see me and yell and me probably makes it worse . 3 months is enough time for me or her to make a decision ? I mean I understand this hurt and anger will last way longer than that but if you mean her , you're saying she has to make a decision if she wants to try ?
Well, i believe as her husband, he can have her forcefully admitted to a mental hospital for an evaluation
I understand that , obvious he's miserable everyday and having to see me and yell and me probably makes it worse . 3 months is enough time for me or her to make a decision ? I mean I understand this hurt and anger will last way longer than that but if you mean her , you're saying she has to make a decision if she wants to try ?
I'm thinking more like she's using that as a carrot on a stick.
YTA. Also, you're a racist.
What did she do for you?
I’m so sorry to hear about your troubles with your boyfriend’s girl friends. They sound like such lovely people who only have your best interests at heart. How dare they rub his chest and exclude you from their movie night? They must be so fond of you and your relationship.
You should be grateful that your boyfriend is such a loyal and respectful partner who stands up for you and sets boundaries with his friends. He clearly loves you very much and would never do anything to hurt you or make you feel insecure. You are so lucky to have him in your life.
You have every right to be upset and to remove yourself from the situation. Why would you want to hang out with people who treat you like dirt? You deserve better than that. You should focus on yourself and your happiness, not on what his friends think or say about you.
Your boyfriend is having a hard time coming to terms with your decision because he cares so much about you and wants you to get along with his friends. He doesn’t want to lose either of you. He’s not being selfish or insensitive at all. He’s just trying to balance his social life and his love life.
You’re not stuck in the middle, dear. You’re in control of your own destiny. You can choose to stay with this wonderful man who has such amazing friends, or you can choose to walk away and find someone who respects you and treats you well. The choice is yours.
There would have maybe been hope if she had cut him off after she got caught. Her reluctance to do so means she’s sorry she got caught, next time she’ll hide it better. That and they’ve only been married 4 months and this has been going on almost the whole time.
I would be worried about having a child with somebody so quick to throw away a member of the family
You are lonely.
Talk with you sister about it. How did he find the texts? Did he just go through her phone without her permission? Again, it sounds like you both would benefit from therapy.
She sounds like a lot of fun. What exactly is the problem you are having with her? She's not weird at all…she's expressing herself. She sounds very creative and artsy.
I think ultimately she is allowed to do as she wants, but you should make it clear that you are allowed to react appropriately. If she leaves indefinitely, you cannot guarantee she will have a place here waiting for her. If you are forced to fill her role and use your support network to take over her responsibilities, and then she comes wandering back, why would you make room for her again and undo the mending of that space? Why risk having to do all that work again if she leaves?
Have a serious ocmversation. Tell her you'd prefer she went on the two week trip and then got some therapy and made a real plan. But if she decides to shirk her responsibilities, she may not come home to carelessly take up the role of wife or mother again. Just be frank with her. She may ultimately realize that yes, she doesn't want those responsibilities anymore and wants to walk out. But she has to be extremely aware that something like indefinite traveling basically makes that choice anyways, so she needs to find different strategies to pursue these answers. And also ask if she is questioning her place in this family, and playing the role of wife and daughter. She may not be, and hasn't realized that her actions are undermining things she already has and will miss.
Not a problem!
I've had 2 serious relationships die out due to poor communication. Now my wife and I are very open, even when it's difficult, and it makes such a difference
That’s actually why I asked that question. On the “face” it seems like a recent issue, because you literally presented it as a recent issue. But having the experience I have and learning over time, I assumed this wasn’t just a recent issue, and you just confirmed as much. I’m sorry that’s the case, but from an advice perspective, it helps me better help you with the situation knowing the full truth.
Now, considering you disclosed it, I’d tell you with absolute certainty that being insecure and a “whiny little boy” is absolutely problematic, as well as putting her on a pedestal in the way you suggest you have.
It’s here though that I feel it’s necessary to both tell you about me as well as explain an all too common misconception about relationships. So first, I’m a guy and I’m happily married. I tell you this so that you understand I’m not here being negative for the sake of being negative. I love love and wish you nothing but the absolute best. I give advice on here thought because I’ve been through it all and learned from it. In saying that, I’m certain I had your mindset at one point or another in thinking that as men you’re required to be selfless, treat your partner like a goddess, and consider yourself lucky if that partner simply is with you. But then when you’re unhappy, question whether you “deserve” to have or raise those feelings. I’ll come back to that.
Second, what’s been going on for a long time? Be completely honest here as I want to give the best possible advice. Feel free to PM me if you prefer. Either way, I want to help.
So helpful
Yes that's what I meant, no one has said something like that to me unironically.
But it's different coming from someone I love dearly. I don't care if randos think I'm 1 or 10/10.
His opinion made me panic because he has previously expressed how disappointed he was that I have small boobs lol. (That was almost 4 years ago and he asked for forgiveness.)
I am completely satisfied with him. But this re-ignites the thought that he may not be completely satisfied with me. Meaning we're not a good match 🙁
He’s being mad inconsiderate of you, for sure, have you spoken to him about it? It seems unlikely given the constant noise but it’s possible he just lacks self awareness, which is a red flag in and of itself.
It's not abusive to say that you can't be in a relationship with someone if they maintain close friendships with people who don't respect you and actively try to get them to cheat on you. I would never be friends with someone who tried to sabotage my relationship with my partner.
Now that you've set an ultimatum, you need to be willing to follow through and break up with her if you really mean “me or them.” If you don't, that is manipulative.
Yeah I gotta be honest, I'm a introvert, and my job is very extroverted, and when I expect to come home to an empty quiet house and there are people there – it's the quickest way to ruin my mood. I would be pretty annoyed if I were OP.
'I'm not willing to be your little secret. If you can't be honest with your gf about meeting up with me, then I'm not comfortable meeting uo'
It's not inappropriate, but it could make their side of the family dislike the partner even more for retaliating.
yup! & maybe he is projecting !?
This is exactly it. I helped my wife pay off her car. It's hers, she chose it, she drives it 98% of the time, and what not. I paid over half it's msrp because she asked if I could help her pay it off a bit faster. It's not mine just because I paid it off.
It's her car first before it's ours? OP is being real weird about ownership and money. It's reeks of possessiveness.
Zero.
I fucking broke down crying. I fought him and sobbed and he wouldn't budge. He signed up for dating sites, and because of our living situation, I agreed to open our relationship.
Non-monogamy isn't a bandaid, it's a lifestyle. Srsly, given how toxic things were, you should have just walked away…
My BF has noticed that I'm distant and has started asking me to share my location, prepare more meals at home, etc etc. He says he wants us to be committed, but I don't want to anymore.
Then break up, be single, work on yourself, and move on.
That picture only came much later so possibly, the first one was purple though
In my opinion it was a form of cheating. I’m asking other people's opinion as I could be just being biased with my friend. Everybody has their own opinion and there could be something we don’t see.
Well, you have to tell your husband. Can you imagine if the situation were reversed and he didnt tell you?
Discuss what to do with your husband and remind him that this friend has never overstepped the line before and has never been physical with you. That might defuse your husband enough to have a discussion about what to do before he rushes out the door to confront friend or blow it up among the friend group. Its possible you and husband could decide to quietly go no contact with this guy as much as possible – because there is the friend group to consider. But that's a discussion and decision for the two of you.
Remember that you didnt blow anything up. The friend did by confessing his feelings.