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SmallDBigB, 27 y.o.
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Date: November 25, 2022
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Sounds like the signs of someone seeing her spouse as the one keeping her from mister right. Sorry, but her treating you like crap, moving out for a couple days and having dinner with a single guy from work tells you exactly what is going on here. She has feelings for the guy.
Literally everything here points to an affair. And it IS with that guy and I'd be surprised they didnt spend the night together.
Im not one of those “Oh my God the skies falling” but she is checking every cheaters box from what you wrote.
Plan accordingly, and make sure she gets and STD test before you sleep with her again. And be grateful you arent married, the split will be far easier. Remember when someone shows you who they are, believe them.
or dude coulda… yk not have sex with u lol like tf are u supposed to do from here
The best way to “reset” is for one of you to actually take the step and do so. Converse the way you want to have conversations with each other, act the way you want both of you to act towards each other, do the little things that you want both of you to do. Be the emotional leader and your partner will follow suit. Chantel Heide outlines this in her book “Fix That Shit” (I think it's called) and it really did fix my relationship.
This is why women we react the way we do when we find out a man has cheated on us. You were trying to not be judgmental and he gaslit you and in a typical narcissist response, diverted the main issue of his infidelity and brought your insecurities to the forefront. This man does not deserve you, he lacks the ability to show any remorse and wants to justify his behavior. Give yourself some time but staying i. This marriage is not best for you. Wish you all the best OP.
Girl be careful with age gaps. He's not going to get or do better. He doesn't deserve it.
Did you tell him what she literally said to you when you met her for coffee? I wouldn’t stay friends with someone who spoke to my partner that way… but ultimately your problem isn’t her, it’s your boyfriend. She can be as flirty as she wants, but if you have a boyfriend who draws clear boundaries, it’s not a big deal. If he’s not willing to draw those boundaries, trying to take responsibility for telling her to back off isn’t going to fix your relationship.
you are being fair and objective so i will try my best to do the same. Firstly im really not one for therapy as i have difficulties being in touch with my emotions and even more talking about the few i have
secondly i didn’t comfirm nor deny that i was feeling used i merely stated that i don’t live in her head so i can never say for sure.
Thirdly, and i wish to make this clear this time: i am 100% aware that i am the cause of all my problems in this relationship and know she is just doing her best with what i have given her.
It doesn't matter whether she contributes a penny or not or wether her name is on the mortgage/house or not. They're using marital assets to buy the house half of it is hers regardless.
Then, if you know that for a fact and break up with her, I don’t know what you need so many peoples constant validation just break up with her everybody saying to do it, then just do it
If you give her money she's still going
In their early 20s too! He just wants to blame everything else and make an excuse to get divorced
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I do hope this sentiment gets through to the husband and doesn't damage your relationship with them. Was lovely idea next time pass it by them though.
A 14-year-old is still a child do you remember what you would like it 14? In fact, he would be considered a pedophile in today’s world.
You do realize that this fucking guy has KILLED ALL OF YOUR DOGS, right? This is so sick, I just….can’t.
Please, get out. You, not your pup, are safe around him.
What you do is this:
1) Collect and save any evidence that She has made these accusations and that they are false
2) Break up with, preferably by text or with witnesses
3) Tell everyone you know that you broke up with her over false allegations of physical abuse and show them the evidence
4) Go full no contact with her, but save any and every message she sends you
Look mate, you’re young so perhaps you don’t understand the full ramifications of what can and likely will happen. You will lose friends and family over her allegations if you allow them to stand, staying with her while she is saying these things will make people think they are actually true. Any same adult with a partner that’s says this shit would dump them in an instant.
Even worse, if her allegations are reported to the authorities, either by her or by a concerned friend, you would likely be arrested. Even an arrest on your record is life changing. You will lose your job, you will find it difficult if not impossible to find housing, you will lose friends and family members. And this is the best case scenario. Stop trying to explain this away and starting running the fuck away from her.
People should shut up and let you live your life how you want with who you want. As long as everyone is a consenting adult then it really doesn't matter what other people think.
Because he hasn’t made any redeeming comments that suggest otherwise.
The only one that ends up in legal trouble. If she tells people he likes little children without any proof is her and she says she doesn’t have any proof.
22 is not double 18. They are four years apart.
How so? He has done everything for a year for her? Either way i conceed clearly only women mental health matter so ✌️
Sometimes paid content is better. But if he is going through this whole “I shouldn't watch porn” thing it is more likely he was just desperate enough to get caught by the sales pitch.
I did some really freaky shit when I still believed porn was wrong.
I’ve never seen Benadryl pills lose in a bottle actually. Only blister packs.
Agreed with the rest of your comment, but Benadryl can indeed be found in bottles. The ones I've gotten contain 100 tablets.
u/Flashy_Contract_969 are the pills she takes bright pink? Because if it's really Benadryl, they will be. That's an easy way to check if it's actually Benadryl.
I think most people may have commented before that edit?
So what was the point then..?
I just Googled the show and it looks like I might be able to watch it through Animal Planet. I've tried playing with the cat, giving him treats, feeding him, etc. And he still hates me.
Thank goodness you also think she's selfish; I was worried I was overreacting to think that LOL
So, he purposefully used a weakness he knew about you to be cruel/torture you like a school bully who grows into a cruel adult and told you to mature? Right…..Sure you want to be in that kind of relationship where a person does this to you? Oh, by the way, cruelty is always funny to cruel people so when he says “it's funny”, he's not lying, it actually his funny to him. The thing about cruelty tho is that it's not funny to the victim.
This is setting off all kinds of red flag alarms to me. Make sure that your friends and relatives know exactly what’s going on.
Stop filling out the paperwork, and take a hard look at how he acts. If he keeps pushing you to continue, break up with him. I don’t want to see you featured on a True Crime Missing Women episode!
I can – she didn't owe him anything because they had only known each other for a matter of days, and if she was flirting with someone or even had sex with them it doesn't mean she was seeing anyone.
What’s talking nicely and giving direction?
Clear assertive instructions of what you want if not followed is a him problem, if the instructions aren’t clear it’s a you issue, on the communication side anyway.
Dude clearly way too nervous so if you continue you are going to have to take the lead, make sure you are done first before he is, rinse and repeat he should be trained soon enough.
Or just end it and move on, up to you and what you want to do.
Because he doesn’t want the expectation of actually pleasing his partner sexually. He wants someone who doesn’t care about sex so he can tell himself it’s ok to not put in effort.
your brother isn't as nice to you as you think he is if he scheduled his wedding on your graduation. choose yourself, no one else is going to choose you. Congratulations, Doctor Lastname, TheowRA_ughhhhhh, MD.
Sounds like he's gaslighting you. I think you are in a toxic relationship my friend.
!Remindme 3 days
I was really struggling to even makes sense of these sentences OP.
… Is everyone STILL drunk in this story?
Not all kinks line up, just like I’m sure you both have other sexual misalignments (the way you kiss, or one of you enjoys oral or penetrative sex more than the other, whatever).
You can negotiate outside sexual contacts ethically. You can try. He can abstain. You could present a visual fantasy where you basically put on an IRL cam foot show (lots of lovely folks out there doing that shit on OF). Make a game of it, see how close his tongue can get without touching you. Maybe you could get a bit dom and punish him if he accidentally touches…turn your feet into the forbidden fruit that fuels his imagination. He can come on your feet…
Use a bit of imagination and have fun with it!
Having a baby with this man will be a mistake. I don’t know what led you to believe otherwise.
I followed my high school boyfriend to college and I caught him cheating on me two weeks in. I’m not saying this will happen to you but follow a path to a good future and if he ends up being along the journey then great. But you need to put yourself and your future ahead of him for now.
It's cheating, and premeditated at that. It's not like it was a surprise, he went in planning to have that happy ending.
Follow your gut and leave him.
What a pos.