You keep quiet. Not your wedding. Don't get upset about it.
Your feelings are your own to manage. You don't have to tell everyone what you're feeling.
You're going to have disappointment come up in life. How you handle it determines your character. Do you sort it within yourself or do you cause drama?
I think you’re showcasing a lot of ignorance here.
Look into India’s history with colonialism, as well as who currently is on top of the world’s economy and see how that might factor into the colourism shown by the bf in this situation.
You keep describing how you were dressed and that you weren't drunk, but you don't consider the possibility that you very well may have been acting inappropriately and didn't know it. “Be aware of your surroundings” in the setting you describe sounds more like he's warning you about how you're acting rather than warning you about some creepy guys in the room. Being aware of your surroundings in that setting sounds like he's asking you to read the room.
An important thing with sex whether it's using hands, genitals or mouth. Let your partner know when you're getting close. And discuss beforehand that when you say that, they should keep doing exactly what they were doing, no speeding up or slowing down. The amount of men I've had who suddenly go a lot faster when I say I'm close, ruins the fucking moment and then I can't cum. You have to tell him exactly what ruins the orgasm so he can avoid doing that in the future.
I do actually but if she wants to know what’s going on she’s gotta step up. I’m sorry if that offends you but people don’t get their needs met ( anxiety or not ) if they don’t speak up. It shouldn’t be op’s problem because her partner should just invite her openly because it is her house as well. Unfortunately he’s not so she can either just quietly suffer ( seems you’re a fan of that option, I am not ) or she can say something and stand up for herself even if it is hard. In this case she doesn’t even have to do much, just walk out on the porch with an iced tea and say “ hey!” with a smile. If they freak out… why would they freak out?
Don’t be sorry, it’s a good thing. And I know and I don’t care who downvotes. I’m a mother and I had to have a late term abortion because my second child had abnormalities. Nobody has an abortion because they want to. Most have one because they need to. And I’m still a believer that it’s a woman’s right to choose what kind of life she will have and her unborn kids will have. As well as already born ones because every new child affects the extorting child’s life as well. It’s nice to see that a religious person is open-minded for a change.
Your partner can't process the grief he has. So, as a way to try and deny it he is trying a number of very toxic and frightening coping strategies. The denial of the pregnancy outright, the idea you cheated, these are ways to depersonalise what was lost, distance himself, convince himself he doesn't have to care. And with the degree of denial it requires and the extreme abusive behaviour he is demonstrating to you right now, I think it basically qualifies as a protracted mental breakdown. Extreme grief can lead to PTSD style problems and denial and violence are very common manifestations of it.
He knows, on some level, if he goes to therapy they will tell him that this is all on him. That what he lost was real, that this is a coping strategy that has gone toxic, that he has to face the loss properly. And he doesn't seem able to do that. He would chose your potential death [which be real what he is doing could lead to] over facing that part of himself.
He is broken. Just completely and utterly broken. And you can't help him with it unfortunately, this is the time you need to leave for your own protection.
Leave her alone
You keep quiet. Not your wedding. Don't get upset about it.
Your feelings are your own to manage. You don't have to tell everyone what you're feeling.
You're going to have disappointment come up in life. How you handle it determines your character. Do you sort it within yourself or do you cause drama?
What’s that? Sorry..
When’s the last time you saw someone change who they fundamentally are?
I think you’re showcasing a lot of ignorance here.
Look into India’s history with colonialism, as well as who currently is on top of the world’s economy and see how that might factor into the colourism shown by the bf in this situation.
It's been 6 years and you still don't know what you want? Do her a favor and stop wasting her time.
Thanks, this sounds like reasonable advice
You keep describing how you were dressed and that you weren't drunk, but you don't consider the possibility that you very well may have been acting inappropriately and didn't know it. “Be aware of your surroundings” in the setting you describe sounds more like he's warning you about how you're acting rather than warning you about some creepy guys in the room. Being aware of your surroundings in that setting sounds like he's asking you to read the room.
An important thing with sex whether it's using hands, genitals or mouth. Let your partner know when you're getting close. And discuss beforehand that when you say that, they should keep doing exactly what they were doing, no speeding up or slowing down. The amount of men I've had who suddenly go a lot faster when I say I'm close, ruins the fucking moment and then I can't cum. You have to tell him exactly what ruins the orgasm so he can avoid doing that in the future.
Came here to say this. Boundaries are not things you make other people abide by!
I do actually but if she wants to know what’s going on she’s gotta step up. I’m sorry if that offends you but people don’t get their needs met ( anxiety or not ) if they don’t speak up. It shouldn’t be op’s problem because her partner should just invite her openly because it is her house as well. Unfortunately he’s not so she can either just quietly suffer ( seems you’re a fan of that option, I am not ) or she can say something and stand up for herself even if it is hard. In this case she doesn’t even have to do much, just walk out on the porch with an iced tea and say “ hey!” with a smile. If they freak out… why would they freak out?
Dude needs therapy
Don’t be sorry, it’s a good thing. And I know and I don’t care who downvotes. I’m a mother and I had to have a late term abortion because my second child had abnormalities. Nobody has an abortion because they want to. Most have one because they need to. And I’m still a believer that it’s a woman’s right to choose what kind of life she will have and her unborn kids will have. As well as already born ones because every new child affects the extorting child’s life as well. It’s nice to see that a religious person is open-minded for a change.
Your partner can't process the grief he has. So, as a way to try and deny it he is trying a number of very toxic and frightening coping strategies. The denial of the pregnancy outright, the idea you cheated, these are ways to depersonalise what was lost, distance himself, convince himself he doesn't have to care. And with the degree of denial it requires and the extreme abusive behaviour he is demonstrating to you right now, I think it basically qualifies as a protracted mental breakdown. Extreme grief can lead to PTSD style problems and denial and violence are very common manifestations of it.
He knows, on some level, if he goes to therapy they will tell him that this is all on him. That what he lost was real, that this is a coping strategy that has gone toxic, that he has to face the loss properly. And he doesn't seem able to do that. He would chose your potential death [which be real what he is doing could lead to] over facing that part of himself.
He is broken. Just completely and utterly broken. And you can't help him with it unfortunately, this is the time you need to leave for your own protection.