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  1. I agree with that, and it’s a conversation we have had, but no he says that he’s felt this responsibility to her in the past but does not after many many times of him helping her and her blowing up her life and not speaking to him. For me, when you decide to marry someone and talk about having kids with them, you also agree to prioritize them. I’m not saying he needs to shirk all family responsibility, but that I would hope at some point he would listen and prioritize us, our life and relationship over his mom’s presumption to our life here and draw boundaries with her. He gets angry when I tell him that it’s too much for me, or I need a break or that I won’t be treated poorly or made uncomfortable in my own home, but her bad behavior gets excused because “that’s just her”.

  2. You’re in an abusive relationship. Abusers are typically sweet when they’re not abusing. You need to leave.

  3. I am telling you that perhaps it has absolutely nothing to do with her feelings for him but instead being upset she “wasn't enough” for him to marry after 9 years. Those two are not mutually exclusive.

    She could be mourning and want absolutely nothing to do with him anymore. Or like you seem to feel yes it could also be she feels he mad a mistake.

  4. If you get your money back and go home to your dogs and family, will that be an improvement or not? That answers your questions I think.

  5. Thanks for the reply. There are some…less savory…places on this website, so I do understand what you mean.

  6. Just say that you want to diagnose her with BPD.

    Vierolyn, you're confusing spotting warning signs with making a diagnosis. There is a world of difference between the two. Hundreds of mental health centers list the symptoms for various mental health disorders on their public websites to encourage the lay public to learn how to spot warning signs. They know that, when laymen are able to spot these warning signs, they are far more likely to see a professional to obtain a diagnosis — and they will do so much more quickly.

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