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what is the craziest that goes through your mind
Date: November 3, 2022
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I think if he’s a nurse, he knows the difference between a real medical issue and something that’s not a medical issue because you were fine. I think it comes down because of the line of work he was in. He was dismissive of it.
I think it has already been suggested here, but you should also talk about sex outside of the bedroom. “Hey, the other night when we were having sex, you told me you wanted me to talk to you, what kind of things could I say to turn you on?” For some, compliments are important. Others might like the idea of you telling them exactly what you want them to do, like “I want you to flip me over and take me.” I think healthy sexual relationships grow with communication and exploration; validating what is working and what is not (same with stuff outside of sex).
It's normal to feel sad and want your partner to spend time with you when you are sick, especially on NYE but you needed to communicate it beforehand since who knows if she even knew that's what you wanted.
If we are all dropping personal anecdotes to frame our judgements of OP, both my girlfriend and i have canceled social plans of our own choosing to look after and dote on one other when we were sick and would feel sad if the other chose not to. Our friends and family always understood. I don't consider us irrational children, we just want to treat those we love that way and be treated that way.
People are grasping at any straw to call op a manbaby and dunk on him for being a little emotional and dramatic when sick and away from his SO on a fun occasion like New Years. I genuinely think traditional gender judgement is playing a part in this. You're not evil or lesser for being emotional and not being stoic when sick, nor is she for going. Talk about your feelings with her when she's back, not to make her feel guilty, but for your own comfort.
Also I know a 102 fever isn't life threatening but in my experience it still feels really shitty, why are people making it out to be practically nothing?
I don’t understand why you all are so collectively irate. Idk what you do in your YT household, but we don’t play that slapping/hitting shit in African households. She starts school this year so that shit needs to be in check now. If you don’t believe in regulating a child’s behavior, I would’ve even take parental advice from you. I can already imagine how messy and distorted your household is and how yours raising your kids.
Not sure why y’all are so upset because when I said these things to my boyfriend he said “I have feelings for you, so I’m willing to compromise on this. This is something we can work through.” But here y’all are upset about people you don’t even know.
Oh my God he's known her since she was ELEVEN? This is very creepy and predatory.
He's disgusting.
Haha, sorry! Couldn't keep my cool and confronted her just a minute prior to your congratulations. She replied quite expeditiously (in 15 minutes), apologized profusely, said she's ashamed of herself and told me she has this type of 'periods' (whatever that means) sometimes. I guess she's just the avoidant type?
That's some pretty solid advice from the therapist. It's a shame that it wasn't more helpful. I saw in another comment that you are still trying to communicate with him so I'll spare you from the whole “this relationship likely isn't going to work.”
There are a few things you can try communication wise. I suggest to a lot of people who have trouble with conversations devolving into arguments. Write out your statements. I don't mean just texting each other, which may or may not help. Actually write out what you want to say with pen and paper and have them respond like a really old timey letter chain. It does two things, it prevents either of you from talking over each other, and it also forces you to think in full coherent thoughts instead of just word vomiting at each other.
Another thing to consider is that I think most conversational styles fall under either emotional or logical. Most people use a mixture of the two, it can be helpful to separate those out. If you want to focus on the emotional part you can frame the conversation about, don't worry about right or wrong, just focus on how I'm feeling and how you're feeling. Don't bring the past into the conversation, just talk about maybe how you're feeling sad that he doesn't seem to think about things from your perspective. He may think you're being too sensitive, so what? Then he should try thinking extremely sensitively, all feelings are valid in this conversation regardless of where they're coming from.
Though, that kind of conversation may not be to your boyfriend's forte. In which case a logical conversation may be in order. This is tricky because emotions can color logical responses but both people have to be able to know what is a logical response and what is an emotional response. If you say you're feeling hurt, that is a logical response despite being about an emotion, it's a fact that you're hurt. But him saying you're being too sensitive is an emotional response since that's subjective and not based in a fact. An appropriate logical response to you saying you're feeling hurt is why are you feeling that way?
It can be tricky, but hopefully you can figure it out in the short term.
Your husband needs more fiber in his diet. This is incredibly gross and there cannot be anything good happening in his digestive system.
Controlling behavior and overdramatic reactions are your future judging from the current experience.
Goodbye Felecia would be your healthy response.
I agree with your comment and this goes for both myself and husband. I have been insecure in my marriage for so long that I let myself entertain feelings for others to come up the surface. Both of us need to start watering our side of the lawn.
This is a really, really good point that I've never seen brought up when the issue of sharing phone access comes up.
If he was really not doing coke, he wouldn't have bullied you to his friends like that.
“I'm sorry you think talking shit behind my back is a more rational reaction than explaining to me that you've got allergies. I refuse to date someone who thinks making fun of me is in any way reasonable. We are done.”
((HUGS)) You need to remember you and ex were toxic together. Who cares who's cooking he likes better; he isn't the only one would love your cooking.
Continue to work on yourself and stop comparing your life to your ex's. Your person is out there somewhere, you just haven't met them yet.
Good riddance.