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Date: October 9, 2022
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I’m not doing it because her mom is extremely bitter and hair can be damaged during any type of coloring process. She’s constantly calling the police, constantly starting arguments, banging on his window to open the door so she can “fight” him ? and if she does that to me well..I respect his kid just thinking this would turn out negatively.
I do other things with his daughter like I mentioned, pedicures, shopping but semi permanent results? No.
Treat it as a learning experience, I made plenty mistakes when I was your age and I could have needed some of that advice myself back then 🙂
well, it sounds like he didn't crack open that pandora's box on his own… TBH, after a quick scan of the comments you're getting, I can't believe so many people are failing to remind you of your role in this mess. The number of people that feel the need to endorse the OP on reddit is friggin ridiculous, karma vultures I say, they're not trying to help. I'm not saying you don't have the right to change your mind, but you either got to piss or get off the pot. You need to just come straight out and tell him that you messed up when you agreed to “dabble” in it, it's not who you are and it must stop or the marriage is over. It really is that simple. If you don't want to be his doormat, and if you think he's capable of stopping you guys have to treat this like the problem it is and move forward in unison. If he's unwilling, you guys are incompatible and staying together will just ruin you. I wish you well, and hope you find a way forward, truly, good luck.
I think that's enough of this partnership…. because now you know what she feels and it is disrespectful to your girlfriend…. you should say that you didn't think it was appropriate and that you didn't know that she thought that and that out of respect for the ones you love you don't want to be with her anymore while you train
I would rather have you smoke weed Than drink. I have seen the damage alcohol Has done to people. I also find alcohol to be The biggest date rape drug. I have smoke weed since I was 14. I am 62 Most folks think I am mid 40s He says he will dump you for weed. What else Is he willing to dump you for. That's his way Of showing love for you I think different then most people and will Get down voted on this sub
Our hormone cycles are typically 4 weeks/ 28 days long. We can have affects during ovulation, the week before blood week and during.
If you think its rough being on the outside, imagine having to deal with that, plus pain and blood, and still act like everything is fine.
Thank you! I've been trying to do this. I try to learn how to make him feel good I'm bed and he likes it. I try to really lead and spice things up. He's an honest guy but his actions for me (in bed) just sucks. But I guess I'll have to try harder. Thanks for your perspective
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I’m really sorry. I’ve been there. We were together 5 1/2 years.
If he says he’s willing to “sacrifice his happiness”, you need to move on. It’s awful and it hurts like mourning someone’s death, but you WILL be ok. Don’t invest anymore time into this. Invest time into yourself.
Why are you on Reddit and not at a hospital? Leave, move in with friends or family. Divorce him.
You are addicted to both.
It’s going to be difficult to reduce or remove either from your life.
If you want your relationship to work, then sit down and talk to her about it, set some boundaries on both sides and go from there.
I think it just comes down to your definition of cheating and your boundaries. Personally, “window shopping” as you put it, would be a deal-breaker for me.
Paying for sex and sexual content while in a monogamous relationship is generally frowned upon as porn is free.
I would just say you saw his flirting texts and you're not cool with it.
You are a third wheel in your own marriage. Something is going on that he prioritizes his friend over his own wife. He spends more on gas to go see his friend than he does on his wife on Valentine’s Day. You have to decide how long you want to continue to be the backup option.
So he's not pro choice at all….
Oh, my.
The Vagina Troll is now a lesbian.
Well, hello, there.
Op what nationality are you
This is what happens when you marry literal teenagers. They get jealous of stupid shit like pillows.
?????????????
and yes we've been considering marriage soon..
That's too darn young. What's the rush? Statistically, you've both got another 60+ years ahead of you, your lives have barely begun. You both still have a lot of growing and changing to do, what you want in a partner at 18 may not necessarily be what you want in a partner at 28.
So what do I do?
I say just chill out, keep dating and enjoying each other's company. Don't worry about the father for now, as long as everyone else approves. In time, he may come around.
Looks like you need a new girlfriend
I think this one is faulty
Avoiding anything stressful beyond a certain limit is a red flag, either because he will go over board or is very weak, Jordan Peterson says people like that are dangerous because they will become resentful and eventually lash out, Hitler was resentful of the jews seeing their success while his art career failed.
Thank you so much. Yes, I can’t deny that he is still making little snide comments etc here and there. It’s usually something personal, appearance based, or even during sex. He says he does it to tease me and see how I react. He knows I don’t like it and that I think it’s mean.
I sadly do wonder if he will do the absolute minimum. There was a point where I was aiming for divorce and he could see how emotionally detached I was – I was still “functioning” and keeping our home life running peacefully, but he could tell my mentality had changed. I was honestly surprised he could tell bc I wasn’t ready to talk to him about it. He became nicer, concerned, started asking me what was going on. He started trying in the marriage. He stopped many of the “micro behaviours” that I found hurtful, like rolling his eyes when I would become affectionate.
My individual therapist (who has never met him) said I should make sure I have clearly stated what I feel is wrong with the marriage and give him the chance to change in couples counselling. As soon as I started putting work into the marriage again, he seems to have slowed down on his side of things.
Very good article on abusive relationships. I do think our couples therapist is making the relationship her client rather than seeing us as individuals. I do think she is more neutral. She hasn’t called him out on abuse directly although she does know about the abuse. It seems she is trying very gently to get him to see my perspective and trying to explain things to him in a way that is empathetic to him. I don’t know if it’s working.
His ego can’t handle you supporting him, but he realizes that he needs your support.
He is happy with other women, because they don’t know his “weakness” and he can pretend to be an “alpha male” in front of them.
You don’t need his misogynistic and chauvinistic bullshit in your life. You deserve much better.
Op please, this. I used to work a rape crisis hotline and had a call from someone who got pregnant after her “good friend” roofied her and raped her during a movie hangout. (Admitted it when she confronted him as there were no other possibilities.)
Her parents disowned her and refused to listen.
I think about her a lot. I don’t know what happened but I hope she was able to put her life back together.
He already isn’t taking no for an answer. Don’t ever let yourself get into a vulnerable position around him.
They're baffled by his condition really. In theory what he has is treatable/manageable (Cystitis and Pancreatitis are diagnosis thus far). But for them to be manageable is going to cost – I can afford the bills for the most part, but I feel guilty every time because it eats in my saving which were meant to go towards our first home.
If it were a cut and dry case – what he has can't be treated and he's going to suffer – then as difficult as it would be, I would do the right thing by the poor thing and have him put to sleep. But because it's treatable it's making it difficult for me to let go.
Those are all legitimate concerns, and I'd say I was in a similar camp. I kinda figured there'd be kids, but I was perfectly fine if there wasn't. With our second on the way, the state of the world certainly weighs more on my mind now. It was certainly scary before our first. The scary part wasn't so much the actual caring for a kid. The scarier part was the fact that you'll be shaping this person. What if I cause them to be a serial killer or what if they're the class bully or on and on and on it goes with the what ifs. The biggest lesson I've learned so far is to just roll with the punches and love them the best you can.
The other part, there are no two ways about your way of life will change. As you describe, after entering adulthood, you only have to worry about yourself and then latter on your significant other, but at least for myself, having a spouse didn't change my way of life too terribly much. We did things together and still had time to do our own things. If we wanted to do a random road trip some weekend, we could. You're still two grown independent adults (hopefully). Once a kid enters the picture, you truly do live your life for somebody else. It's cliche to say and it's also cliche to say that having a kid is one of the most rewarding feelings in the world. It certainly has its challenges, but when you hear your kid laugh or say their first words or just generally explore the world around them and learn and grow, all your worries and fears and doubts disappear.
Sorry for rambling and take the words of an internet stranger for whatever they're worth. It's perfectly normal to be scared. Your life will change. Are there moments I would love to just have that independent life and spend my money on whatever I want? Sure. But I can't imagine my life without my son now. My fear with my second that's on the way is that there's no way I could love them as much as my first. People say that you do though, so rather than scoffing at what they say (like I did before having any kids) I'm gonna trust in it now cause it really is something that's hard to feel and understand until you experience it. The unfortunate answer to your last question, though, is that you won't know right now. It was the biggest leap of faith I had in my life.
She’s taking most everything she can
This person doesn’t know the meaning of consent and thus can’t be trusted with nudes.
Step 1: stop sleeping with her
Step 2: See a lawyer/mediator/whatever they use in your country and file for divorce. Your wife will be served with papers.
Step 3: Don’t answer the phone.
Step 4: If she threatens to kill herself via text, call the police immediately.
5 bucks says the 19 year old is more mature than you.
Would it be cheaper to buy it at the store and Have it at home ?
Intelligence isnt a single number, but rather there are fields of intelligence which cover different areas of smarts and skills.
Your bf has the emotional intelligence of a damp leaf.