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In my opinion this has more to do with how you were raised. Different people have different beliefs regarding modesty. You are not wrong to feel the way you do there are many women who will have similar feelings to what you are expressing but your current girlfriend obviously does not. The difference in option will cause friction. You can try to change how you feel or find someone more compatible but you won’t be able to change her.
It sounds almost identical to our situation. Not to sound mean or like I'm questioning how your feelings but are you really ok with that compromise or is it still affecting you. I'm asking because I really do want to do right by my wife and make her happy.
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So, I’m not the most well-endowed fella, so I’m not able to always get the girl off. It just depends on the person. But I always make sure she gets off one way or another. I’m definitely one of those people that gets aroused from giving my partner pleasure. I can barely even fathom the situation you’re in. I don’t get how some guys can be that damn selfish in bed. Sex is always better when both people are having fun.
I appreciate that. I feel like I know it was the right one but it was just so hard because everything else was fine. Of course I initiated the convo too after feeling really anxious about it; so I am just worried it’s just a self destruction type thing. If she was 50/50 it would be different but I could tell from our convo she was more like 90/10, plus paired with the timeline I could just envision the convo again in like two years except this time it would be much harder than a 4 month breakup. 🙁
If you want to go on the date- Sure. But tell him about your plans to move and see how he reacts ?♀️
“My daughter is jealous of me because I’m gorgeous and get lots of attention”
My god this post makes you sound insufferable, I’m not surprised she doesn’t want you at the wedding and I’m sure there’s a lot more to it than her being insecure about her looks in your presence.
Also it doesn’t give any context at all.
I agree you should forgive him. It will be beneficial for you in the long run. That doesn’t mean you forget what he did to you or that you become friends or get back into any kind of relationship with him if you don’t want to. I would advise you to have very little contact if any at all with him. You aren’t responsible for anything he does. He is obviously mentally not well
As I'd said, it was on its own on the bottom shelf, so pretty hard to miss from where I was lay with my head right next to it. He is a writer, and it just looked like any other of his writing projects, which he has no problems showing me and letting me read. I wouldn't have considered it snooping.
Don’t be shocked when your relationship hits a rough patch, he decides that you’re “just like the rest” and turns that vitriol on you. It’s only a matter of time.
I am in now way romantically intelligent so help me out, if you find someone manipulative why would you date them?
I agree it is very fast. what burns bright, tends to burn out quickly.
What specifically do you think you will “destroy” if you leave your current partner for your ex?
Romantic relationships end. Maybe you would have to move to a new place, negotiate joint custody with your ex, etc. That's all do-able.
What exactly are you afraid will be destroyed?
This is fabulous insight. I have nothing more to add, I just wanted to thank you for sharing and providing solid advice.
Stay with him. At your age it’s too late to find someone else and the fact he made it so clear cheating was bad and then cheated does NOT mean he doesn’t respect you at all. Christ alive. ?♀️
Semantics ? I’m bored of you
Imagine 11+ years of abuse and knowing only one person. Not being allowed to work or leave and if you do it’s a fight because you’re being accused of cheating. I’ve dealt with this urge to hurt him the same way he’s hurt me for more than just today or this year or this half a decade. I’ve fought it. But I’m in a low at the moment. That’s not a red flag. I’m looking for advice. Unless you’ve lived it… don’t victim blame a victim. Maybe I’d rather be caught and killed than to live what I live.
Don’t beat yourself up. I was in your shoes once. 8 years of marriage and 2 kids is what he threw away. I didn’t want to live anymore after that. But that was 3 years ago and I’m happier now than I’ve ever been. I promise time does heal these wounds. Sorry you’re dealing with this.
I also think that's the case, which is kind of unfortunate…
I would absolutely do the same for her. Making compromises from both sides is a vital component for a healthy relationship imo.
Even if she’s not cheating on you(X to doubt), she is still being dishonest with you. If you are determined to stay together she has to be okay with a new degree of scrutiny and frankly distrust in your relationship until she regains your trust. Good luck.
That because its a work
(Occasional sexual incompatibility hence the open relationship,
For most, this isn't actually a “small” issue at all. Non-monogamy is a lifestyle, not a band-aid. If you don't think you're sexually compatible….why not date other people whom you are more compatible with?
, his difficulties with expressing his emotions and my psychological/self-esteem issues)
Also not small issues at all. Communication is essential.
We still love each other a lot. I don't think either one of us wants to lose the other, but we don't want the other party to be unhappy either.
Love is never enough, and from the sounds of it, it sounds like you rushed things quite a bit, and have been avoiding talking about the deeper issues going on.