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ᴍᴀʀʏ, 25 y.o.
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Date: October 15, 2022
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Tell him his dick isn't big enough to be your boyfriend.
That’s a question I use to ask when I was a teenager??♂️ If he’s talking about past sexual experiences on date one, it’s probably because he lacks substance.
He is very kind and affectionate. I get a nightly massage from him. He's very supportive of my goals and is paying for me to return to school. He does say he loves me. But we're looking at moving back to the state he lived in when he was with his ex so he's been telling me a lot about the area … including stories.
The soulmate thing I don't know. It bugs me. I don't believe in soulmates but I won't say he's not mine.
Yeah I'm so confused and I read the first reply and I'm like it agrees completely so what's the issue? And then the others, why the downvotes? Aha both parents definitely should be involved and just because it is normal or okay doesn't mean he can't impose a boundary still too. Just as he is with himself not showering with them. It would be okay, but he doesn't want to so we shouldn't be telling him otherwise. He doesn't need to either, so I just find it rude to be like “you can do that!” When clearly he's just not comfortable. If he's not comfortable with them showering with anyone else but the two parents or siblings that's totally reasonable ??? No matter how okay it is ? idk why everyone is pushing it like he has to be. The grandma doesn't have a right to it
Thank you ??
Even I don't know actually … she honestly doesn't give a **** about me
Thanks for the advice. I approached the student guidance counselor, (coursework guidance counselor we get at the start of our freshman year) and he has taken my report in, and has called the girl for an immediate appointment with him regarding the situation. I think I should not have to pursue this matter further beyond speaking to the dep. Dean about how this situation should play out.
Agreed. Both result in trauma but they're bloody different. In this context it's a disingenuous comparison.
They are during the day. They're home same time as me and I spend every evening helping her with them. Just seems like she's not interested in helping me at the weekends.
You need to go to therapy. Your wife is irreparably broken. You CANNOT fix this – her family first mindset would most likely meet the reality and cause a complete breakdown. It’s time to grieve losing what you had
And moving in together
My sister conceived four kids using the pull out method.
She was awake and feels shame. You didn’t rape her.
Thank you for this. We ended up talking about it and I feel a lot better about things going forward, but it's definitely going to be a work in progress.
Ignore it, let your friend distance herself
Please do so. You deserve to feel secure and safe in a relationship and something is making that not happen.
Don't waste any more emotions or effort on her. She is not worth your time.
Don't do this to yourself. Staying “friends” right now makes it 1000x's worse when you're the one hurt. Staying “friendly” and friends are 2 different things. You want to stay friends in hopes of winning her back. She wants to be friends because she didn't want to hurt you or because she's a collector and she keeps all of her ex's as friends.
She's going to move on. Do you really want to be someone she confides in re: relationships?
Saying hi when you see her is totally different than continuing to text her as a “friend”.
At some point. You have to understand that you shouldn't be fighting to stay in someone's life who rejected you as a partner. If she texts you, that's one thing. But if you're always initiating the convo, now you're chasing her and she'll tell all her gf's that you're still after her. You can say she's not like that, but yes, yes all my gf's were at that age, including me.
It hurts. It sucks. But she rejected you. It's done. You wouldn't keep going back to a job you got fired from, why would you keep contacting her? Best thing you could do, is delete her number so you're not tempted to text her.
On what site? So I can sign up and do porn on them.
So, you want the friend to help you get back together with the girl, but you are worried the friend will tell the girl that you want to get back together with her?
Why would you NOT want the girl to know you want to get back together with her?
In fact, why not cut out the middleman, stop the games and just tell the girl directly, “Hey, Suzie. I'd love to talk about whether you're interested in giving this another shot, because I am.”
You wrote in your post that she isn’t classical beautiful— which is fine- but plenty of women could read this and interpret this as ‘omg, he doesn’t think I am beautiful’. You are shy, she didn’t really get you and now she does. That’s ok. When I met my husband, I was a little meh, but he really grew on me. It’s been 18 yrs. Weigh her response then with her behavior the last 7 yrs. It’s similar to worrying about the wedding and not about the marriage.
Ok but he absolutely should not be treating people the way he does but he refuses to change. In his own words, “subhumans don’t even deserve the boot; they deserve the barrel.” He’s referring to his gun. And yes, he thinks most nonwhite people are literal subhumans.
People are probably confused cause we all masturbate to something specific, ie a scenario where a person has something that makes them attractive to us, or even a person we know, right? What does someone with no sexual attraction have a sex drive for if nothing and no one turns them on?
I will say this: if he doesn't use insta a lot, sometimes the algorithm will just default to sexy young women. My male friends' experience of an uncurated TikTok feed was bleak to say the least.
That being said, trust your gut. There's a reason you looked for this. Let your bf know you're feeling insecure in his attraction to you and have an honest conversation about what you saw. Only you can decide what to do from there.
He dors understand it, but it's more convenient for him to pretend otherwise.
You might have convinced me to return to therapy. Not because I need it, but because my relationship needs it.
You need it.
Good advice from your friend.
You aren’t going to save her from this relationship and even if you somehow did, she’s not going to date you afterward.
She is in this relationship because she wants to be. You can’t change that. The fact you even want to is troubling- trying to exercise control over someone else’s relationship is not a good look.
This is not a new thing. You need to move on and find your own relationship instead of waiting isn’t he wings for someone else.
I appreciate your honesty. And it is hard for someone on Reddit to know the whole picture by me just posting a snippet of my life or thoughts on the internet. However I don’t think it’s bad to talk about how one is feeling with their partner. It is good to have open honest communication instead of letting things stew. Jealousy unfortunately is a human emotion and is natural. It’s how we express it that matters. I don’t care if women talk to him it’s normal. What I was trying to clarify is that the woman who was going after him knew about me and had met me before. I didn’t like this and told him. I don’t feel tile that is unreasonable. Respectfully, I don’t think you know enough about me to determine whether or not I’m mature enough for an “adult relationship”.