So here's what you do. You block her on everything, move out & move on. She's clearly going to cheat if she hasn't already. You arguing with her is a waste of time, she's already showed her colours, move on.
You have to get comfortable with who you are because that’s what she likes. You also need to understand that maybe you aren’t “at her level” right now, but you have the ability and also the motivation to be the best version of yourself, not for her, but because you are a normal human being, with potential. She seems to see it in you, so carry on my friend!
You’re not well, are you under a psychiatrist’s care? Your priority needs to be your mental health. And your BF should likely move on, this ain’t a time for you to be in a relationship. Perhaps when you are well, you two can see if reconnecting makes sense. You need serious help , pls get it for yourself.
1) Your boyfriend does not reserve the right to enter you whenever he wants. You aren't a fleshlight.
2) Does HE have to shower before you go down on him?
2) You have a medical condition that causes you excruciating pain. If he's calling anything to do with the management of your medical condition “a stunt” you need a new boyfriend.
Well, the past 4 months have been crazy but positive. I’ve shifted my whole mentality and got into therapy about 5-6 months ago. I realized that I was totally gaslit through the whole thing because I allowed her to sway my morals and boundaries to make the relationship “work”. I realized that I would never be happy with someone who couldn’t even respect me at the bare minimum, as well as realizing that a lot of her viewpoints were mainly new wave radical feminist beliefs which often, disproportionately reflect good men like myself.
For 4 months post break up, I was carrying the weight of the rent we had agreed to split under contract ($2425), I was carrying costs and time to share custody of our dog, I was experiencing constant harassment via text from her to bully me and my family verbally about 2-3 times a week, I was alone and isolated 50 miles from my family, I was working full time through this, struggling to make payments because of most my monthly costs doubled if not tripled in her impulsive decision to move out on 2 days notice.
Since then, I’ve removed her from the lease, found a new roommate, went after money for unpaid rent that I was legally obligated, blocked her number, I got a raise close to 25% putting me at an almost 6 figure salary at 23 and gave her the option for me to either keep our dog or for her to. She decided to take him so I made her pay me $500 for my half that I paid and dealt with the pain of losing my beloved dog that I raised for close to a year for reasons outside of my own. Primarily I would not have time to give him the attention he needs and deserves especially after this BS, though I would be able to afford him had it digressed in that direction.
It’s been a rough winter, but even with my losses, I think I came out pretty clean from a warfare of manipulation, mind games, and bullying. All of her bad qualities surfaced and made me realize I would never give her the time of day at this point in my life going forward. I’m realizing that I am actually attractive and desirable again and her bullying made me feel like I wasn’t, coupled with my own allowance for her to paint me in such a light.
I feel good, thought I’m still dealing with the loss of my dog; I’m coming to realize I can still do what’s right for myself while also feel the emotions that are inherent to the context.
If you're not going to trust your partner don't date them. So many posts on here could be solved with “work on your trust issues instead of flipping out on assumptions.”
I mean she’s only ever said it out loud, not particularly if I left but as a sort of warning ⚠️ hey if you ever hurt me my dad will kill you.
We live in a corrupt third world country so I don’t doubt that he would get away Scott free.
I’m trying to work hard but it’s been a year and I feel like I haven’t made much progress. You know how it goes with job searching. I basically self taught myself a new profession and therefor don’t have a resume that gets me in. The only people who have humored me have been unpaid internships
I moved here a year ago and I really have no close friends here
You being solely dependent on this person for friendship, companionship, etc is extremely unhealthy. You've only known the guy for 5 months, yet your entire self-worth seems wrapped up in this relationship.
I loved who he was before them, to him it means nothing
Who he was before was just nice enough to get you hooked. He is showing his true self now. Dont hold on to that fantasy he was a few short months ago. Again, you've only been with him for 5 months. You should not be so vested in this relationship that you can't see it as a mistake and move on.
This isn't a question anyone else can answer for you, you either decide that You want to be with him as he is, or you don't.
It's possible for someone to be a great person but not the right person for you, if he isn't able to give you what you need from a relationship, it's neither of your fault, you're just not compatible. It all comes down to what you both need from a partner.
Good luck on figuring this out, there isn't much outsiders from your relationship can do to help with this I think.
So here's what you do. You block her on everything, move out & move on. She's clearly going to cheat if she hasn't already. You arguing with her is a waste of time, she's already showed her colours, move on.
Not true. Rape kits usually don't even get brought up in court unless the victim didn't know the perpetrator.
You have to get comfortable with who you are because that’s what she likes. You also need to understand that maybe you aren’t “at her level” right now, but you have the ability and also the motivation to be the best version of yourself, not for her, but because you are a normal human being, with potential. She seems to see it in you, so carry on my friend!
You’re not well, are you under a psychiatrist’s care? Your priority needs to be your mental health. And your BF should likely move on, this ain’t a time for you to be in a relationship. Perhaps when you are well, you two can see if reconnecting makes sense. You need serious help , pls get it for yourself.
1) Your boyfriend does not reserve the right to enter you whenever he wants. You aren't a fleshlight.
2) Does HE have to shower before you go down on him?
2) You have a medical condition that causes you excruciating pain. If he's calling anything to do with the management of your medical condition “a stunt” you need a new boyfriend.
Seriously, the bar is in hell.
Well, the past 4 months have been crazy but positive. I’ve shifted my whole mentality and got into therapy about 5-6 months ago. I realized that I was totally gaslit through the whole thing because I allowed her to sway my morals and boundaries to make the relationship “work”. I realized that I would never be happy with someone who couldn’t even respect me at the bare minimum, as well as realizing that a lot of her viewpoints were mainly new wave radical feminist beliefs which often, disproportionately reflect good men like myself.
For 4 months post break up, I was carrying the weight of the rent we had agreed to split under contract ($2425), I was carrying costs and time to share custody of our dog, I was experiencing constant harassment via text from her to bully me and my family verbally about 2-3 times a week, I was alone and isolated 50 miles from my family, I was working full time through this, struggling to make payments because of most my monthly costs doubled if not tripled in her impulsive decision to move out on 2 days notice.
Since then, I’ve removed her from the lease, found a new roommate, went after money for unpaid rent that I was legally obligated, blocked her number, I got a raise close to 25% putting me at an almost 6 figure salary at 23 and gave her the option for me to either keep our dog or for her to. She decided to take him so I made her pay me $500 for my half that I paid and dealt with the pain of losing my beloved dog that I raised for close to a year for reasons outside of my own. Primarily I would not have time to give him the attention he needs and deserves especially after this BS, though I would be able to afford him had it digressed in that direction.
It’s been a rough winter, but even with my losses, I think I came out pretty clean from a warfare of manipulation, mind games, and bullying. All of her bad qualities surfaced and made me realize I would never give her the time of day at this point in my life going forward. I’m realizing that I am actually attractive and desirable again and her bullying made me feel like I wasn’t, coupled with my own allowance for her to paint me in such a light.
I feel good, thought I’m still dealing with the loss of my dog; I’m coming to realize I can still do what’s right for myself while also feel the emotions that are inherent to the context.
She’s insane. Her problem now
If you're not going to trust your partner don't date them. So many posts on here could be solved with “work on your trust issues instead of flipping out on assumptions.”
Secrets are corrosive to all close relationships. It doesn't really matter at all, and you should tell her.
I mean she’s only ever said it out loud, not particularly if I left but as a sort of warning ⚠️ hey if you ever hurt me my dad will kill you.
We live in a corrupt third world country so I don’t doubt that he would get away Scott free.
I’m trying to work hard but it’s been a year and I feel like I haven’t made much progress. You know how it goes with job searching. I basically self taught myself a new profession and therefor don’t have a resume that gets me in. The only people who have humored me have been unpaid internships
I moved here a year ago and I really have no close friends here
You being solely dependent on this person for friendship, companionship, etc is extremely unhealthy. You've only known the guy for 5 months, yet your entire self-worth seems wrapped up in this relationship.
I loved who he was before them, to him it means nothing
Who he was before was just nice enough to get you hooked. He is showing his true self now. Dont hold on to that fantasy he was a few short months ago. Again, you've only been with him for 5 months. You should not be so vested in this relationship that you can't see it as a mistake and move on.
This isn't a question anyone else can answer for you, you either decide that You want to be with him as he is, or you don't.
It's possible for someone to be a great person but not the right person for you, if he isn't able to give you what you need from a relationship, it's neither of your fault, you're just not compatible. It all comes down to what you both need from a partner.
Good luck on figuring this out, there isn't much outsiders from your relationship can do to help with this I think.
No contact with EXes is the best thing to do It Saves me from so much unnecessary drama and stress