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ALL GOALS MET [Multi Goal]
Date: October 9, 2022
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WeekendPussy
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And this post is a very good example of why! He tried to trick OP into giving up her life goals for his marriage fantasy!
Yes, free yourself from her hell. She’s got problems with accountability and truthfulness. Maybe your proximity contributed to you overlooking her significant character flaws, but her issues will only mount with time.
This is what I would do in your shoes. Do not confront him about it. It’s a waste of time and energy. I would carry on acting as if I’m still in the dark. Collect all the evidence. Screenshot everything, open a secret google account and store everything on that drive. Go to a bank and open a separate back account. Make sure it’s not the bank you use with your husband. Pull out cash every time you go to the store and start squirreling it away little by little.
Start collecting every document that covers your assets. Meet with a few lawyers. You will be working closely with this person for years seeing you have children together. Make sure they are a shark but also someone you can trust.
Start building your support team. Call in trusted friends, let them know what’s happening.
When all that is done, you hand him divorce papers with printouts of all the screenshots. Tell him he has 30 days to move out. If you want to be extra petty, find this woman and send her the printouts too. Tell her you are leaving him over his obsession and lack of involvement of your marriage. Tell her it basically a heads up he might come looking for her and good luck.
Op, ever wonder if your depression was because you are living in an unfulfilled life with a dud of a husband?
Mental health nurse here! The best thing for being in a relationship with someone living with BPD is COMMUNICATION. When you're both in a calm mood, sit down and discuss what happens when she's experiencing different aspects of her PD spectrum; what happens when she's extremely anxious, low, angry etc. So that you're aware of what's happening. Ask how best she feels that you should respond to these. And work out boundaries for BOTH of you so that you have an established dynamic. This way you're both on the same page. No two people with BPD are alike. Learn how it affects her, and build from there.
Thanks, I feel like a fellow Londoner will understand.
This is what is so frustrating, trying not to vent here, she is so out of touch with London life especially given the current climate. When I try be realistic, I am seen as the bad guy ruining the fun.
I get that 24k is not a lot and so do feel guilty for pressuring her, like I said in another comment, I just think she can afford more than 300 but won’t accept it.
I’ve been looking everywhere in any zone within a 90 minute commute to Shoreditch and less than £10 daily travel. I work hybrid, 3 days at the office so I can deal with distance. She will likely find a more local job to avoid travel costs. There is stuff that I’d be happy with, same quality as my current flat but we both need to agree. Only a month left too so beggars really can’t be choosers.
If it weren’t for me she’d be living with her Mum, which I keep trying to explain will not last for ever. I get the sense her Mum is already pushing for her the move out anyway.
I was thinking something along those, only it was about cheaters who project and accuse their partner of cheating.
Good for you.
So sorry OP.
None of us saw thus coming .
On your blood what is going on? Have you seen a nature path??
You want a good one not one that pushes oils at you and charges a leg.
We have seen very good results on a freind who had cancer.
Take care of you first then worry about marriage.
Hugs sweet soul.
BJ’s literally make me sick. My ex used to keep pepto-bismol in his bedroom because every time I gave him head (he had me trained that I always had to swallow) I would become nauseated. Without the pepto, I would puke. After breaking up with him I decided I wouldn’t bother with them again, and have been happier for it.
You don’t have to do anything you don’t want to in the bedroom- setting boundaries is important. If your partner can’t respect that, especially when you have already worked out a solution that is keeping him satisfied, then show him the door. Though, I am sorry he allowed his friends to talk him into treating you this way.
Well you do sound a bit insecure by mentioning that they’re gay or bisexual. You think that bc she’s cuddling with them something more will happen because of their sexualities.