81 thoughts on “Sweet Choco Goddess live webcams for YOU!”
Your husband does sound like a loser but that’s not the point of this post. Your dad needs to relax and just let things go for a day for the benefit of the entire family. Everyone wants to see you and the kids and you guys should be able to see everyone and your husband should also be able to enjoy the holidays with family. Your Dad isn’t wrong at all. If I were you I’d just drag ur husband to ur parents house or out to coffee and just force them to make up or agree to be cool for a night. Then tell your husband to grow up after and ask your dad to give him another chance.
I’m not actually that woman but “I’m that woman” regrettably. The boyfriend does deserve to know. He has the right to make his own decisions based on this information. I won’t ever cheat again. I understand the horrible damage it causes to all three parties involved. Just be honest when you tell him. The guy actually did tell my boyfriend and I’m glad he did. I sucked and I needed to be called out on this.
This is pretty far from “young and dumb”. It’s a very simple concept that shouldn’t need to be explained. Unless his mom also accompanies him on all of their dates he understands why it’s a problem, he just doesn’t care.
Yes. A long time ago I was ghosted (without reason) by someone I liked. She just stopped contact and I still have never seen her again.
I met many people after this and two of those girls became girls I really loved.
I try my best not to look backward because I really believe that it's impossible to grab a future if you're too busy looking at the past. Life is full of shitty things, sometimes you have to accept and move on. Quicker you do the better you feel
Not trying to be an asshole when I say this, but why did you agree to opening the relationship when you weren't really on board with it.
I was a bit apprehensive at first but after some talk I thought it wasn't a bad idea.
You let her talk you into it, and from what I've heard from the mjority of the couples who have done this, it's relationship suicide. She wanted to experience something new, you did not. She is now changing based upon those new experiences, while you are slipping/stagnating, which I don't mean in a bad way, but you're not changing with her, so the way I see it, it's going down and you're going down with the ship.
It's time to have a serious conversation about your emotions and true feelings regarding all of this. Maybe couples counseling would help as she seems to have thought you were on board for this with the discussion of marriage.
I wonder if he thinks, maybe subconsciously, that he could “catch” cancer from you. Some people even get turned off by illness. There is no way to know without talking to him.
She’s interested in you, and you’re rejecting her. There’s no way to not hurt her. Being rejected hurts.
Just tell her what you told us here. “I’ve really enjoyed getting to know you and you’re a lovely person, but I didn’t feel the spark for a relationship.” Wish her the best and then end it there
You're petty AF, you didn't have a problem with this when she was talking to you or whatever you did. But now that she ghosted you and hurt your manchild heart you're “trying to do the right thing”
You should know that you want to be with him. That everyone around you knows that you should be with him is irrelevant. They don’t get a vote.
If I was working shifts and only saw my wife on weekends I would be with her the whole time, not off drinking with buddies. You aren’t his first priority and that’s simply not good enough.
It seems like this relationship has run its course. Time to end it and find yourself. Family and friends will kick up a stink but that’ll settle down.
My “bio” parent had 6 children with 4 different men. She couldn't even afford the first two she had.
She was never getting pregnant by accident. She always just wanted to trap a bf however none of them stayed bc she's a miserable human being that I despise.
I digress…
This isn't awesome for your kids. Growing up in poverty sets a person waaaay back
I don't blame him for being angry at himself or you for being hurt by it. Just tell him that it's ok that he's angry but you'd rather not hear it to keep it himself. Thats an perfectly rational request
Like this dude is straight up being insecure and jealous AF. He's got some major trust issues from his past and he's taking it out on you. It's not cool for him to be constantly leaning over your shoulder and questioning your every move. And it's definitely not cool for him to be telling you who you can and can't talk to. That's some major control issues right there.
You deserve to have your own space and autonomy in the relationship. It's important to set boundaries and communicate with him about how his actions are making you feel. But also, try to understand his feelings and his past trauma, it's important to have empathy. But still, it's not a excuse for him to be controlling you.
You need to have a serious talk with him about his behavior and how it's affecting your relationship. Let him know that you care about him and understand where he's coming from, but that his jealousy and control issues are not okay. Encourage him to seek help and professional counseling to work through his past traumas, you can also suggest couple counseling to help both of you work through the problems in your relationship. And if he's not willing to do that and change his behavior, then you have to make the difficult decision to walk away for your own emotional well-being.
Just remember, you deserve to be in a healthy and respectful relationship where you feel safe and respected. And if he can't give that to you, then it's time to move on. Stay strong and don't be afraid to speak up for yourself.
Are you in therapy? What your family OSS doing, it’s not acceptable and it’s not on. I think going low contact with them and getting on with your life will help. You could meet your new partner along the way.
From what you're saying, it sounds like this girl is definitely showing some signs that she wants you to make a move, whether that's kissing her or whatever. But it's totally understandable that you're hesitant to go there, given your past relationship and the trust issues that came with it.
The important thing to keep in mind here is that you're in control of the situation. Just because she's showing interest doesn't mean you have to act on it right away. It's totally cool to take it slow and get to know her better before making any big moves.
As for the kiss, it's definitely not a confirmation that you two have to start dating or anything. Like, it's just a kiss, it's not like you're signing a lease together or anything. So don't worry about it too much.
Just be honest with her about how you're feeling. Let her know that you're having a great time hanging out with her, but that you want to take things slow and get to know her better before making any big moves. She'll either be cool with that or she won't, but it's better to be upfront about it than to just go along with whatever she wants.
At the end of the day, just stay true to yourself and don't rush into anything you're not comfortable with. Keep it casual, keep it chill, and see where things go. It's all good bro.
Strange request. You should do what you want with your time. And it is important to keep other social contacts. Some go to sports every week or even more. And playing DnD is a hobby, too. Or are you drinking and eating too much at these nights? But what should be balanced is the location where you play. So e.g. not every Thursday at your house but circling the location between all players.
All of this, plus I also want to add of layer of implicit bias to your excellent points, if that's ok.
OP would you be more upset if it had been a man? Would that have felt less threatening? Would she have felt more guilty about it? If so, consider that it might be because in the back of your mind, you feel that same sex relationships are less genuine.
Cheating is cheating, regardless of the gender they cheated with. Unprotected, too, is just gross and irresponsible. You probably feel neutral because it hasn't set in, yet, but…this is kind of a dealbreaker for most people. Sorry, dude.
Also…my guy, how did your bestie's GF get it? She's either cheated on him with more than your GF or he gave her [his GF] chlamydia himself. Messy situation all around.
Its not one mistake its one mistake you found that he is still lying about. Tinder is the hookup app. Regardless he's cheating and thats reason enough to go.
You don’t because it is weird. Stop talking to other people about it and caring what they think. If you and your bf both enjoy it that’s all that matters here.
Therapists can’t help your nose smell worse or your mouth smell better. Some people have unbearable breath and it’s usually bacterial so you both would have it. The someone y’all should both see is your dentist and your ENT. If you don’t have a medical reason for bad breath, get some Therabreath mouthwash for both of you, use a tongue scraper, and take an Oralbiotic lozenge before bedtime. But no, not wanting to smell or taste stagnant saliva is not unreasonable. Him wanting to share stagnant saliva is unreasonable and he needs to clean his tongue.
I divorced my first wife because of her bad hygiene habits. She wouldn't shower for 3 days and wanted to have sex. Don't get me started on her dental hygiene.
I divorced my first wife because of her bad hygiene habits. She wouldn't shower for 3 days and wanted to have sex. Don't get me started on her dental hygiene.
I divorced my first wife because of her bad hygiene habits. She wouldn't shower for 3 days and wanted to have sex. Don't get me started on her dental hygiene.
I divorced my first wife because of her bad hygiene habits. She wouldn't shower for 3 days and wanted to have sex. Don't get me started on her dental hygiene.
This relationship shouldn't survive. The only advice Im going to give you is to please get some self respect and dump this absolute loser once and for all. Hes an anchor that will drag you down.
No, he's 31. Regardless of experience, some things are common sense. Even if you aren't the side chick you should still break up. He sucks and treats you like crap.
Yes. But let's compare this to OP, where this is part of a pattern of behaviour. A pattern her bf can't deal with anymore. If OP wasn't seemingly hoarding this like the other items, he wouldn't care. That is the context, not just one incident.
Thank you! ❤️❤️❤️. This post has me very disturbed. I am very worried about OP, and another thing worrisome is spotting members there that also don’t seem to know what this is either. I hope she updates that she got away from him, and getting help.
Haha this comment is so not useful. You probably hate gay and trans and non-binary people too? Maybe I identify as somewhat queer and regardless of the relationship circumstances, taking charge on this is fitting with who I am.
You’re just as much of a bully as your husband and your “sweet” boy because you’re an enabler. You enable the bullying and you are so blind at how you have an entire family full of bullies
My co worker isn’t in my same department just company and I’m leaving in a bit that’s why this is even on my mind. If I was staying I wouldn’t act on it
How long have the two of you been together? is it worth it to you to stay in the relationship knowing he’s holding a grudge against you for something you did before the two of you were officially together?
“We” didn’t break shit. YOU made a string of poor choices and some of them more than once. You’ve hurt her deeply many times.
If you really care about her, disappear and leave her alone. Work on yourself and try to be a better human before you consider dating anyone else. But leave this poor woman alone. Forever. Let her grieve the loss of the future she thought she had with you and let her move on and be happy with someone who treats her well.
Okay. Here’s what you didn’t say. You love each other. You want to build a life together. There’s none of that. I would think it would be the first thing mentioned. Something to think about.
If she is sexting or doing other things like that, she is not a hoe, she is an incredibly stupid one. Making fake accounts is a thing, and she did everything in her power to make you suspect her.
May be she has one of those sti that show up months after the fact and she wants to have it low key treated before resuming activities.
Or she has a very low libido that she forces in the early stages to not make the bf run away and then she gets back to normal.
But in any case that's not normal and you need to go beyond and simply say that you can understand the lack of sex and live with it but only if you know why.
If she can't even listen to you and accept no as your answer, is this a relationship you want to keep working on? It's really not cool to badger someone like she's doing to you.
Get your stuff. That’s what you do. Tell her it’s unacceptable to come into your home and touch your stuff. She is a guest. Not the home owner. Not the person on the lease, etc.
If you ever go through your partners phone behind their back, the relationship is as good as dead.
I don't want to go through his phone, I told him I never will do it again, I still went in and did it, but I don't want to do it, now I am still doing it.
But he didn't say he wanted to have sex with her. That would obviously be different if he'd actually said something. Not allowing women to talk to men for no reason is not having boundaries, it's being controlling.
Do it at your home, when you’re both calm and you just do it. This isn’t something you can sugar coat to make better. You just have to do it. You know the outcome if you stay with this woman, sometimes love is there just not romantically
Wait. You are probably all worried, understandably. But, I think that if something tragic had happened you would already know. He may be making a show to reaffirm his independence. Bottom line is that you should do what you think is best. Best wishes for a happy outcome.
Actually, he didn't feel guilt until his wife asked for another baby. He ended the affair because he found his wife desirable again. He is complete trash.
There are other relationship structures than monogamy. You could have an open marriage, and negotiate how that would work (DADT? rules on birth control/condoms, etc).
Open, monogam-ish, polyamory…. these can work if you two communicate and if you two are both secure and mature, and a host of other things.
I suggest you check out some other subs (like r/polyamory ) and look up the sex advice column by Dan Savage, Savage.Love (i think) he's based at the Seattle alternative paper The Stranger. He's been advice folks on these kind of subjects for a couple of decades now.
Of course, you can also suggest therapy, and you can also sit down and have a serious, “This is fast approaching deal-breaking levels. Unless this changes, I'm going to do X”. I meqn, he's cheated on you, so apparently he isn't THAT stressed since he has the time and energy to put his penis in other people.
If he cheats on his current partner with you, what makes you think he wouldn't do the same thing to you? There are very loving and faithful people out there. Just because cheating is common now doesn't mean there aren't people out there with values and a conscience. If I were in your position, finding out about his partner and kid is the day our relationship ends. He didn't just cheat but he actively kept his home life secret from you and you for your part continued to sleep with a man who's in a relationship. It isn't your relationship and logically, you do not owe her any loyalty but morally, you know this is very wrong. I was in love with someone too at one point and I thought they loved me too until I found out about their partner in an anniversary post on instagram and it hurt like hell but a switch flipped in my head and every ounce of love I felt was gone and replaced with disgust. Truth is, anyone who can do this to their partner can never be trusted and he probably wouldn't trust you either on a subconscious level because he now knows that you're someone who'd cheat or someone who'd stay with a cheating man so he'd probably never trust you either. This is a mess. It's one thing if he just had a partner. He could just walk away and never look back but there's a kid involved meaning that other woman would always be in the picture forever and what about the kid? Do you know what infidelity does to a kid? Do you know what coming from a broken home does to children? You messed up big time. Walk away. Let him find someone else and you do the same. If you stay, you'd regret it.
In 2021 me and my mom were in a car crash, she died. Every day I am reminding myself of the things I saw, more than terrible to see how someone is stuck, crying for help and knowing the damages to her body (I read the autopsy she died in the hospital) I know it’s not easy, for me even got harder with time. But you get used to live with it. Remind yourself of the beautiful moments with her, write a letter to her even go to her grave and “talk” to her. The pain won’t vanish but you may find peace in the little things you do to remind yourself of the good times. I hope life is kind to you, you deserve it.
So why are you still married to this abusive person who has no desire to change and respect you and your daughter? And don’t say because of your other kids because they don’t trump your daughter. It’s been years of this with no change—your wife has shown you who she is.
No. Leaving is not cowardly. Because you are standing your ground that your daughter is NOT a second-class citizen to her OWN FATHER. But staying with a woman who hates her, who, by your own admission, forces you and your child out of YOUR OWN HOUSE every summer due to her mistreatment, IS cowardly. Because you are being passive. You are being complicit. You can tout all this bullshit about “We don't fight in front of her, I stand my ground” but you are just lying to yourself. You are refusing to accept reality. Your wife does not love your child, and my continuing to stay with her, you are telling her that you will accept that.
You and your wife being married does not avoid 'a broken home'. Do you know what a broken home is? A home with parents who resent each other. A home where children feel excluded and unwelcome. A home where there is mistreatment of ANY kind. That is a home that will fuck up your children a lot more than two homes. Get your head out of the sand.
It's a tacky thing to ask. Yes, you're both benefiting from the procedure, but A) Like you said, it's his body, B) He will keep the benefit if the relationship ends and C) You've only been together a month.
I can't imagine asking someone to share the cost of elective surgery unless we're sharing finances already. (And even then, it would depend on the surgery).
Yeah, she did. She talked to a therapist, but homeotherapy help her the most. Also, her familiy is very supportive. But, it is a long way from being completly peacful in mind.
I get it, nothing is completly safe in life and anything can happen. But, that doesn't mean it shouldn't happen or at least to try. Just saying that threw me off the tracks and scared me a little bit. I'm afraid that nothing will be the same anymore. If break up happens, that's life, but to break up just because she thinks that she will hurt me is apsurd to me. We didn't break up, but those words are stuck in my head.
Probably emotional and lashing out given her circumstances, either way use this as the catalyst to getting out of this mess. When she contacts you and she will apologise if you need to but make It clear you will no longer be involved in her life.
You are supposed to be equals in a relationship. Remind her that your commitments are also equal and that it is unfair and disrespectful to dismiss yours based on predictions of the future. There is zero certainty that her and her friends will be close forever… or you and your friend. Blood relatives have falling outs all the time. As a part of the wedding party, wouldn't she be too at whatever main table being too busy to keep going back to you, anyway?
Your husband does sound like a loser but that’s not the point of this post. Your dad needs to relax and just let things go for a day for the benefit of the entire family. Everyone wants to see you and the kids and you guys should be able to see everyone and your husband should also be able to enjoy the holidays with family. Your Dad isn’t wrong at all. If I were you I’d just drag ur husband to ur parents house or out to coffee and just force them to make up or agree to be cool for a night. Then tell your husband to grow up after and ask your dad to give him another chance.
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I’m not actually that woman but “I’m that woman” regrettably. The boyfriend does deserve to know. He has the right to make his own decisions based on this information. I won’t ever cheat again. I understand the horrible damage it causes to all three parties involved. Just be honest when you tell him. The guy actually did tell my boyfriend and I’m glad he did. I sucked and I needed to be called out on this.
This is pretty far from “young and dumb”. It’s a very simple concept that shouldn’t need to be explained. Unless his mom also accompanies him on all of their dates he understands why it’s a problem, he just doesn’t care.
Yes. A long time ago I was ghosted (without reason) by someone I liked. She just stopped contact and I still have never seen her again.
I met many people after this and two of those girls became girls I really loved.
I try my best not to look backward because I really believe that it's impossible to grab a future if you're too busy looking at the past. Life is full of shitty things, sometimes you have to accept and move on. Quicker you do the better you feel
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Because he doesn't need to test the kids for that. He wants to test himself and his wife and the kids' results are a mix of those two.
This is false, both my mom and I did the test and my results were made more refined once hers came in.
Yes, please update us if you set them up!
Not trying to be an asshole when I say this, but why did you agree to opening the relationship when you weren't really on board with it.
I was a bit apprehensive at first but after some talk I thought it wasn't a bad idea.
You let her talk you into it, and from what I've heard from the mjority of the couples who have done this, it's relationship suicide. She wanted to experience something new, you did not. She is now changing based upon those new experiences, while you are slipping/stagnating, which I don't mean in a bad way, but you're not changing with her, so the way I see it, it's going down and you're going down with the ship.
It's time to have a serious conversation about your emotions and true feelings regarding all of this. Maybe couples counseling would help as she seems to have thought you were on board for this with the discussion of marriage.
I wonder if he thinks, maybe subconsciously, that he could “catch” cancer from you. Some people even get turned off by illness. There is no way to know without talking to him.
Aside from that, I hope you get well really soon.
She’s interested in you, and you’re rejecting her. There’s no way to not hurt her. Being rejected hurts.
Just tell her what you told us here. “I’ve really enjoyed getting to know you and you’re a lovely person, but I didn’t feel the spark for a relationship.” Wish her the best and then end it there
That age gap was a jump scare girl
Okay, thank you
Why not, I eat into my 40s and see old retirees going to get breakfast at McDonald's.
You're petty AF, you didn't have a problem with this when she was talking to you or whatever you did. But now that she ghosted you and hurt your manchild heart you're “trying to do the right thing”
You should know that you want to be with him. That everyone around you knows that you should be with him is irrelevant. They don’t get a vote.
If I was working shifts and only saw my wife on weekends I would be with her the whole time, not off drinking with buddies. You aren’t his first priority and that’s simply not good enough.
It seems like this relationship has run its course. Time to end it and find yourself. Family and friends will kick up a stink but that’ll settle down.
I already did I don’t have it, thank god
My “bio” parent had 6 children with 4 different men. She couldn't even afford the first two she had.
She was never getting pregnant by accident. She always just wanted to trap a bf however none of them stayed bc she's a miserable human being that I despise.
I digress…
This isn't awesome for your kids. Growing up in poverty sets a person waaaay back
I don't blame him for being angry at himself or you for being hurt by it. Just tell him that it's ok that he's angry but you'd rather not hear it to keep it himself. Thats an perfectly rational request
Like this dude is straight up being insecure and jealous AF. He's got some major trust issues from his past and he's taking it out on you. It's not cool for him to be constantly leaning over your shoulder and questioning your every move. And it's definitely not cool for him to be telling you who you can and can't talk to. That's some major control issues right there.
You deserve to have your own space and autonomy in the relationship. It's important to set boundaries and communicate with him about how his actions are making you feel. But also, try to understand his feelings and his past trauma, it's important to have empathy. But still, it's not a excuse for him to be controlling you.
You need to have a serious talk with him about his behavior and how it's affecting your relationship. Let him know that you care about him and understand where he's coming from, but that his jealousy and control issues are not okay. Encourage him to seek help and professional counseling to work through his past traumas, you can also suggest couple counseling to help both of you work through the problems in your relationship. And if he's not willing to do that and change his behavior, then you have to make the difficult decision to walk away for your own emotional well-being.
Just remember, you deserve to be in a healthy and respectful relationship where you feel safe and respected. And if he can't give that to you, then it's time to move on. Stay strong and don't be afraid to speak up for yourself.
Are you in therapy? What your family OSS doing, it’s not acceptable and it’s not on. I think going low contact with them and getting on with your life will help. You could meet your new partner along the way.
I’m sorry you are going through this.
From what you're saying, it sounds like this girl is definitely showing some signs that she wants you to make a move, whether that's kissing her or whatever. But it's totally understandable that you're hesitant to go there, given your past relationship and the trust issues that came with it.
The important thing to keep in mind here is that you're in control of the situation. Just because she's showing interest doesn't mean you have to act on it right away. It's totally cool to take it slow and get to know her better before making any big moves.
As for the kiss, it's definitely not a confirmation that you two have to start dating or anything. Like, it's just a kiss, it's not like you're signing a lease together or anything. So don't worry about it too much.
Just be honest with her about how you're feeling. Let her know that you're having a great time hanging out with her, but that you want to take things slow and get to know her better before making any big moves. She'll either be cool with that or she won't, but it's better to be upfront about it than to just go along with whatever she wants.
At the end of the day, just stay true to yourself and don't rush into anything you're not comfortable with. Keep it casual, keep it chill, and see where things go. It's all good bro.
Strange request. You should do what you want with your time. And it is important to keep other social contacts. Some go to sports every week or even more. And playing DnD is a hobby, too. Or are you drinking and eating too much at these nights? But what should be balanced is the location where you play. So e.g. not every Thursday at your house but circling the location between all players.
All of this, plus I also want to add of layer of implicit bias to your excellent points, if that's ok.
OP would you be more upset if it had been a man? Would that have felt less threatening? Would she have felt more guilty about it? If so, consider that it might be because in the back of your mind, you feel that same sex relationships are less genuine.
Cheating is cheating, regardless of the gender they cheated with. Unprotected, too, is just gross and irresponsible. You probably feel neutral because it hasn't set in, yet, but…this is kind of a dealbreaker for most people. Sorry, dude.
Also…my guy, how did your bestie's GF get it? She's either cheated on him with more than your GF or he gave her [his GF] chlamydia himself. Messy situation all around.
Its not one mistake its one mistake you found that he is still lying about. Tinder is the hookup app. Regardless he's cheating and thats reason enough to go.
I would just add him. If his account is private, you can ask him first. If it’s public then go for it.
You don’t because it is weird. Stop talking to other people about it and caring what they think. If you and your bf both enjoy it that’s all that matters here.
Therapists can’t help your nose smell worse or your mouth smell better. Some people have unbearable breath and it’s usually bacterial so you both would have it. The someone y’all should both see is your dentist and your ENT. If you don’t have a medical reason for bad breath, get some Therabreath mouthwash for both of you, use a tongue scraper, and take an Oralbiotic lozenge before bedtime. But no, not wanting to smell or taste stagnant saliva is not unreasonable. Him wanting to share stagnant saliva is unreasonable and he needs to clean his tongue.
I divorced my first wife because of her bad hygiene habits. She wouldn't shower for 3 days and wanted to have sex. Don't get me started on her dental hygiene.
I divorced my first wife because of her bad hygiene habits. She wouldn't shower for 3 days and wanted to have sex. Don't get me started on her dental hygiene.
I divorced my first wife because of her bad hygiene habits. She wouldn't shower for 3 days and wanted to have sex. Don't get me started on her dental hygiene.
I divorced my first wife because of her bad hygiene habits. She wouldn't shower for 3 days and wanted to have sex. Don't get me started on her dental hygiene.
This relationship shouldn't survive. The only advice Im going to give you is to please get some self respect and dump this absolute loser once and for all. Hes an anchor that will drag you down.
OP deserves better than this.
No, he's 31. Regardless of experience, some things are common sense. Even if you aren't the side chick you should still break up. He sucks and treats you like crap.
Yes. But let's compare this to OP, where this is part of a pattern of behaviour. A pattern her bf can't deal with anymore. If OP wasn't seemingly hoarding this like the other items, he wouldn't care. That is the context, not just one incident.
hi,
your girlfriend seems to be an utter psychopath, please refrain from any further action to strengthen your ties to her.
best regards
Taken + Obsession = Life right now wants you to learn how to somehow control your feelings.
Got to move on; she will be in your romantic life if that's what fate wants.
Taken + Obsession = Life right now wants you to learn how to somehow control your feelings.
Got to move on; she will be in your romantic life if that's what fate wants.
Thank you! ❤️❤️❤️. This post has me very disturbed. I am very worried about OP, and another thing worrisome is spotting members there that also don’t seem to know what this is either. I hope she updates that she got away from him, and getting help.
Haha this comment is so not useful. You probably hate gay and trans and non-binary people too? Maybe I identify as somewhat queer and regardless of the relationship circumstances, taking charge on this is fitting with who I am.
Taken + Obsession = Life right now wants you to learn how to somehow control your feelings.
Got to move on; she will be in your romantic life if that's what fate wants.
You are wasting your time people have already decided he's the bad guy and isn't worth OP's time.
You’re just as much of a bully as your husband and your “sweet” boy because you’re an enabler. You enable the bullying and you are so blind at how you have an entire family full of bullies
My co worker isn’t in my same department just company and I’m leaving in a bit that’s why this is even on my mind. If I was staying I wouldn’t act on it
You are either getting angry with and using him as a scapegoat for your anger at your saggy titties or getting mad that he didn't lie to you.
You were still on top of him and likely had him still inside of you. He wants to be with you and fuck you and your saggy titties. Take the win!
You were fishing for a compliment or at the very least an empty platitude and now you want to punish him for not capitulating to your craziness.
How long have the two of you been together? is it worth it to you to stay in the relationship knowing he’s holding a grudge against you for something you did before the two of you were officially together?
“We” didn’t break shit. YOU made a string of poor choices and some of them more than once. You’ve hurt her deeply many times.
If you really care about her, disappear and leave her alone. Work on yourself and try to be a better human before you consider dating anyone else. But leave this poor woman alone. Forever. Let her grieve the loss of the future she thought she had with you and let her move on and be happy with someone who treats her well.
Okay. Here’s what you didn’t say. You love each other. You want to build a life together. There’s none of that. I would think it would be the first thing mentioned. Something to think about.
If she is sexting or doing other things like that, she is not a hoe, she is an incredibly stupid one. Making fake accounts is a thing, and she did everything in her power to make you suspect her.
Did you marry a toddler, or is it karma farming?
Not because he told me, I just know about his dating history from digging around
Trying to figure out why anybody bothers getting involved in a relationship anymore seems like everyone cheats anyways
I agreed that he was an asshole for that.
May be she has one of those sti that show up months after the fact and she wants to have it low key treated before resuming activities.
Or she has a very low libido that she forces in the early stages to not make the bf run away and then she gets back to normal.
But in any case that's not normal and you need to go beyond and simply say that you can understand the lack of sex and live with it but only if you know why.
If she can't even listen to you and accept no as your answer, is this a relationship you want to keep working on? It's really not cool to badger someone like she's doing to you.
Get your stuff. That’s what you do. Tell her it’s unacceptable to come into your home and touch your stuff. She is a guest. Not the home owner. Not the person on the lease, etc.
Ah, well, it sucks but your brother's heart was in the right place, just handled it entirely wrong
My god, just break up you children.
If you ever go through your partners phone behind their back, the relationship is as good as dead.
I don't want to go through his phone, I told him I never will do it again, I still went in and did it, but I don't want to do it, now I am still doing it.
Stop
Grow up and break up.
But he didn't say he wanted to have sex with her. That would obviously be different if he'd actually said something. Not allowing women to talk to men for no reason is not having boundaries, it's being controlling.
Could be. So what?
Do it at your home, when you’re both calm and you just do it. This isn’t something you can sugar coat to make better. You just have to do it. You know the outcome if you stay with this woman, sometimes love is there just not romantically
Wait. You are probably all worried, understandably. But, I think that if something tragic had happened you would already know. He may be making a show to reaffirm his independence. Bottom line is that you should do what you think is best. Best wishes for a happy outcome.
Actually, he didn't feel guilt until his wife asked for another baby. He ended the affair because he found his wife desirable again. He is complete trash.
she was shutting him down. That died off quickly.
The messages are minimal
Ohh you poor naive man. If she was shutting him down, he would be blocked, not replying to
There are other relationship structures than monogamy. You could have an open marriage, and negotiate how that would work (DADT? rules on birth control/condoms, etc).
Open, monogam-ish, polyamory…. these can work if you two communicate and if you two are both secure and mature, and a host of other things.
I suggest you check out some other subs (like r/polyamory ) and look up the sex advice column by Dan Savage, Savage.Love (i think) he's based at the Seattle alternative paper The Stranger. He's been advice folks on these kind of subjects for a couple of decades now.
Of course, you can also suggest therapy, and you can also sit down and have a serious, “This is fast approaching deal-breaking levels. Unless this changes, I'm going to do X”. I meqn, he's cheated on you, so apparently he isn't THAT stressed since he has the time and energy to put his penis in other people.
Good luck OP. I hope you two can work it out.
cheater or a troll? take your pick
If he cheats on his current partner with you, what makes you think he wouldn't do the same thing to you? There are very loving and faithful people out there. Just because cheating is common now doesn't mean there aren't people out there with values and a conscience. If I were in your position, finding out about his partner and kid is the day our relationship ends. He didn't just cheat but he actively kept his home life secret from you and you for your part continued to sleep with a man who's in a relationship. It isn't your relationship and logically, you do not owe her any loyalty but morally, you know this is very wrong. I was in love with someone too at one point and I thought they loved me too until I found out about their partner in an anniversary post on instagram and it hurt like hell but a switch flipped in my head and every ounce of love I felt was gone and replaced with disgust. Truth is, anyone who can do this to their partner can never be trusted and he probably wouldn't trust you either on a subconscious level because he now knows that you're someone who'd cheat or someone who'd stay with a cheating man so he'd probably never trust you either. This is a mess. It's one thing if he just had a partner. He could just walk away and never look back but there's a kid involved meaning that other woman would always be in the picture forever and what about the kid? Do you know what infidelity does to a kid? Do you know what coming from a broken home does to children? You messed up big time. Walk away. Let him find someone else and you do the same. If you stay, you'd regret it.
In 2021 me and my mom were in a car crash, she died. Every day I am reminding myself of the things I saw, more than terrible to see how someone is stuck, crying for help and knowing the damages to her body (I read the autopsy she died in the hospital) I know it’s not easy, for me even got harder with time. But you get used to live with it. Remind yourself of the beautiful moments with her, write a letter to her even go to her grave and “talk” to her. The pain won’t vanish but you may find peace in the little things you do to remind yourself of the good times. I hope life is kind to you, you deserve it.
No, but do you really think that I’ll take advice from this site seriously?
So why are you still married to this abusive person who has no desire to change and respect you and your daughter? And don’t say because of your other kids because they don’t trump your daughter. It’s been years of this with no change—your wife has shown you who she is.
What do mean? She lied for no apparent reason, other than assuming this guy would have problem. And that leads to the question – why?
No. Leaving is not cowardly. Because you are standing your ground that your daughter is NOT a second-class citizen to her OWN FATHER. But staying with a woman who hates her, who, by your own admission, forces you and your child out of YOUR OWN HOUSE every summer due to her mistreatment, IS cowardly. Because you are being passive. You are being complicit. You can tout all this bullshit about “We don't fight in front of her, I stand my ground” but you are just lying to yourself. You are refusing to accept reality. Your wife does not love your child, and my continuing to stay with her, you are telling her that you will accept that.
You and your wife being married does not avoid 'a broken home'. Do you know what a broken home is? A home with parents who resent each other. A home where children feel excluded and unwelcome. A home where there is mistreatment of ANY kind. That is a home that will fuck up your children a lot more than two homes. Get your head out of the sand.
I see two issues.
His life plans fell through and now he's experiencing depression.
Your fundamental incompatibility regarding children.
The first one can be worked through if you want to. The second one, not so much.
It's a tacky thing to ask. Yes, you're both benefiting from the procedure, but A) Like you said, it's his body, B) He will keep the benefit if the relationship ends and C) You've only been together a month.
I can't imagine asking someone to share the cost of elective surgery unless we're sharing finances already. (And even then, it would depend on the surgery).
Yeah, she did. She talked to a therapist, but homeotherapy help her the most. Also, her familiy is very supportive. But, it is a long way from being completly peacful in mind.
I get it, nothing is completly safe in life and anything can happen. But, that doesn't mean it shouldn't happen or at least to try. Just saying that threw me off the tracks and scared me a little bit. I'm afraid that nothing will be the same anymore. If break up happens, that's life, but to break up just because she thinks that she will hurt me is apsurd to me. We didn't break up, but those words are stuck in my head.
2023-2019= almost 4 years of COVID (not your relationship)!!!!
Ignore the message and any others that may come. She made her choice and it is hers to correct. You owe her nothing.
Probably emotional and lashing out given her circumstances, either way use this as the catalyst to getting out of this mess. When she contacts you and she will apologise if you need to but make It clear you will no longer be involved in her life.
Save texts and report him
Thanks for your answer. However, I don’t know who his boss is. He’s the boss of the department so I don’t know if there is someone above him
You are supposed to be equals in a relationship. Remind her that your commitments are also equal and that it is unfair and disrespectful to dismiss yours based on predictions of the future. There is zero certainty that her and her friends will be close forever… or you and your friend. Blood relatives have falling outs all the time. As a part of the wedding party, wouldn't she be too at whatever main table being too busy to keep going back to you, anyway?