I (27F) had a friend who was in this situation for five years. Basically, her boyfriend only hung out with her on a scheduled day and that’s it. He never invited her to family events, social gatherings with friends, dates, etc. He also rarely came to anything she invited him to. I was actually friends with her boyfriend too (same friend group) and he never talked about her. Good or bad. Honestly, from the outside looking in, it didn’t even seem like they were in an actual relationship. Eventually, they broke up because she couldn’t handle it anymore. Currently, he’s with a different girl… and he behaves similarly with her as well. He barely ever sees her, and when he does, it’s on a scheduled day and that’s it. I’ve been to many parties/events where he’s there and she’s not. I don’t think he’s living a double life/is cheating. I just think he’s not fond of romantic relationships and that’s all he’s willing to offer in one. That’s probably the case with your boyfriend too. I wouldn’t stay in a relationship like this as it seems extremely unfulfilling.
The most concerning thing for me in this story is that he says it’s “ disrespectful “ of you. Wtf? Like you should always concede to him? Why? Because he’s the man ? A difference of opinion isn’t disrespectful, the fact he wants everyone to discover and see his poo is actually disrespectful to everyone. I would not let go of this, he can sleep elsewhere until he cleans up his act. Because he’s disgusting
Not at all. I’m saying if you find it hard to appreciate the person your with, don’t force it. You can both find people it’s easy with who you click better with.
This is all around so unhealthy and a dangerous situation to be in if she’s accusing you of harming her children.
The lying alone should be enough to make you seriously reconsider this relationship.
Sounds like he needs time to figure out what the relationship with his kids looks like after the separation. Of anyone in this story, they should come first-for him.
But you need to put yourself first. Think about what you truly want and deserve in a romantic relationship. This about what that looks like compared to this. I hope you work on your self esteem and realize you deserve someone emotionally available.
You did nothing wrong here. Your BF said what pronouns he's comfortable with so T has no business being rude to you because she doesn't agree with pronouns that your BF chose as non-binary person.
You are not being the transphobic but she is being gatekeeping this whole stuff. I though being inclusive and transfriendly is about accepting people for who they are and who they choose to be but obviously with T it's not the case.
I (27F) had a friend who was in this situation for five years. Basically, her boyfriend only hung out with her on a scheduled day and that’s it. He never invited her to family events, social gatherings with friends, dates, etc. He also rarely came to anything she invited him to. I was actually friends with her boyfriend too (same friend group) and he never talked about her. Good or bad. Honestly, from the outside looking in, it didn’t even seem like they were in an actual relationship. Eventually, they broke up because she couldn’t handle it anymore. Currently, he’s with a different girl… and he behaves similarly with her as well. He barely ever sees her, and when he does, it’s on a scheduled day and that’s it. I’ve been to many parties/events where he’s there and she’s not. I don’t think he’s living a double life/is cheating. I just think he’s not fond of romantic relationships and that’s all he’s willing to offer in one. That’s probably the case with your boyfriend too. I wouldn’t stay in a relationship like this as it seems extremely unfulfilling.
The most concerning thing for me in this story is that he says it’s “ disrespectful “ of you. Wtf? Like you should always concede to him? Why? Because he’s the man ? A difference of opinion isn’t disrespectful, the fact he wants everyone to discover and see his poo is actually disrespectful to everyone. I would not let go of this, he can sleep elsewhere until he cleans up his act. Because he’s disgusting
Not at all. I’m saying if you find it hard to appreciate the person your with, don’t force it. You can both find people it’s easy with who you click better with.
This is all around so unhealthy and a dangerous situation to be in if she’s accusing you of harming her children.
The lying alone should be enough to make you seriously reconsider this relationship.
Sounds like he needs time to figure out what the relationship with his kids looks like after the separation. Of anyone in this story, they should come first-for him.
But you need to put yourself first. Think about what you truly want and deserve in a romantic relationship. This about what that looks like compared to this. I hope you work on your self esteem and realize you deserve someone emotionally available.
You did nothing wrong here. Your BF said what pronouns he's comfortable with so T has no business being rude to you because she doesn't agree with pronouns that your BF chose as non-binary person.
You are not being the transphobic but she is being gatekeeping this whole stuff. I though being inclusive and transfriendly is about accepting people for who they are and who they choose to be but obviously with T it's not the case.
She could have brought her concerns to you. Instead she did this without warning or consent. This would be a deal breaker for me.
What does it smell like…?
i say get dolled up like a motherfucker so you look as fine as you possibly can, then openly flirt with any of his friends you find attractive.