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get me naked [222 tokens remaining]
Date: October 10, 2022
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I'm willing to bet her responses either going to be gaslighting or admitting it because she's Petty and upset about the whole rent thing. Add record if you can legally or have it sent through texts as proof for the future
Update?
You need to start realizing that people are what they do, not what they say they will do. Then you need to decide if being with him without marriage or kids is worth it, or if you need more than that.
I never said she should force him to get married to her, so not sure where the whole autonomy thing comes from? But the point is that you get at an inpesse and need to pinpoint where your reasons are coming from.
If someone doesn't want to be legally bound to someone and OP just wants to celebrate with family for example, they might do a wedding party without actually signing a legal contract. Or if he doesn't think it's important and OP finds it important, maybe he can het behind the idea of getting married because he doesn't care either way. But if you just state “you just don't want to” while you got together with someone that really wants to… Well, either don't stay together or actually work at getting through this impasse by comparing both your reasons.
Haha well hell anymore his brother might be 50 and play Xbox my buddies all do and they are 54 yrs old
She won't find someone else to marry that fast. But woman think differently then men. Woman just want. Who can say I want to be married by said time vs I want to be married when I'm ready to be married. Only a woman
Sweetie a “financially stable man” who emotionally and mentally abuses you and gives you the BARE minimum a partner should give someone isn’t a reason to stay out of the fear being alone. You ran from an abusive parent straight to an abusive partner. Please please get out of this relationship just because he isn’t physically abusive now doesn’t mean he won’t be. He says he acts this way because of “stress” screams he isn’t too far from to be physical. Being alone isn’t a bad thing just means you haven’t found the person who hasn’t discovered your true worth. Go out find a hobby you enjoy you’ll find friends who enjoy the same thing you do enjoy the sun and the sky. Get this toxic pos man out of your life now please. You seem like a fierce independent woman who needs to appreciate her amazingness.
That’s true, I really appreciate the advice. I think I’m also more concerned because I only see him around Christmas and this is not news I’d like to delivery over the holidays. But since we only see each other then, it feels so high pressure to suggest another time for him (with no assurance he’d actually show up) if that makes any sense.
yeah i don't think it really does matter. I feel like for me, after being with somebody for years it would mostly just be a confusing shock to find out the person never told me something like this, but it wouldn't affect me in the sense of fertility being an issue (as I am also child-free).
I think I just see it as “keeping a secret after 3 years” and to me that isn't very good. For OP it doesn't matter and he is terrible anyway and she should leave him.
You 100% need to break up with her before she gets you into serious legal trouble.
I hope you let your old friend know what a jerk he was forcing you to meet with your ex right before your wedding. Who does that??
I agree. This isn’t a man but a man-child who 1) doesn’t seem to like or respect woman 2) is selfish and self centered and 3) showed you the child he is at dinner with your family. Your friend who told you this isn’t a big deal may appreciate a misogynist but you are right to have your antenna up. Not all relationships are meant to be forever, some are meant to be learning opportunities. Take the lesson and move on.
Are you married?
You are incredibly entitled. He takes you to restaurants with Michelin stars and you complain about him on Reddit. Stop letting this poor guy pay for you
Tell him that you're removing your low value vagina from his life, seeing how it's such a burden to him.
If a boy disrespects you for having and enjoying sex, then don't have sex with him. Misogynists don't deserve pussy access.
It’s over. This marriage is over. Start divorce.
Stop drinking. You can't handle it.
I don’t even know any children who would do something like that honestly
She was prescribed this after consulting multiple medical specialists. And she has weekly meetings with a therapist and social worker.
Lmao goooood luck having “lots of sex” lol My attractive, single male friends have been in LA for two years and have had less sex than you, some have had ZERO luck on dating apps, and none have had relationships despite trying. It’s not as easy as you think especially with your winning personality
I’ll definitely record when I can now, thanks. I did some digging and there’s one party consent in my state so it shouldn’t be a big deal. I did not think this was as serious as some of the replies are telling me it is. I honestly think now it’s worse of a situation than I initially thought, I’m really frazzled
Yes you can. Or at least take pause and tell him you don't want to go ahead like this.
It's time OP
self respect is just around the corner away from this cheater!
This fucker is an attention seeking man child. His whole life everyone has allowed him to be a fuckwit and get away with it. I would let him come and embarrass the shit out of him in front of everyone. Literally tell everyone to ignore him. Not just the videographer and photographer, how does your fiancé feel about him stealing the spotlight from her (weddings are usually about the bride looking beautiful etc..) Tell him if he doesn’t respect you and your request he will never ever have your respect your friendship and your help in future life. He sounds like a fucking loser tbh. I can’t find king stand “practical jokers” It’s just a nice way of saying abusive cunt.
Well if you never go out in public maybe that was a problem to buy that kind of ticket.
But because you have gone out in public to concerts and to activities with large crowds, and she probably figured you would go to this one because it's a band you like.
But if you really want to let her know for future reference, then tell her right now and don't go to the concert.
Because part of the reason she thinks you can do all these things and handle all these things, is because you've been doing all these things and handling all these things.
What's DARVO?
Two months is a very short amount of time to be in love with someone. You definitely could have lust and feel very strongly towards each other, but love takes time and really getting to know someone. Texting isn't for everyone, it has no tone and can feel impersonal. If her style isnt to text, have you asked if talking on the phone would be an option? If it wouldn't, and you're unhappy how things are, might be time to rethink your relationship. You can't make someone be someone they arent, and it can be a hard pill to swallow when you like them.
It stems from my need to people please and being overly caring. Trust me, I’ve tried leaving. At least 3 times. My mom says that dating a narcissist is hard because you become weak and addicted and it’s very hard to leave. I myself cannot understand it. But it’s the shitty reality I’ve placed myself in.
A few months. We had a rule of always checking in if away for long periods. What could have happened?
Found this incredibly helpful so wanted to post it incase anyone in a similar situation stumbles across this post in the future.
I asked chatGPT for advice and this is how it went:
Q: I recently started talking to a coworker that lives three hours away. We recently had a conversation where we confirmed having feelings for one another, but both feel conflicted about the distance. How should we go about this? A: Long distance relationships can be challenging, but they can also be rewarding if both partners are committed and willing to put in the effort to make it work. Here are some suggestions for how you and your coworker can navigate this situation: 1. Discuss your goals and expectations: It's important to have an open and honest conversation about what you both want out of this relationship. Are you looking for something casual or more serious? How often do you want to communicate and see each other? What are your long-term goals for the relationship? Being clear about your expectations can help you both determine whether a long-distance relationship is feasible and desirable. 2. Make a plan: Once you've discussed your goals and expectations, you can start to make a plan for how to make the relationship work. This might include scheduling regular visits, setting up a communication schedule, and figuring out ways to stay connected when you're apart. 3. Be realistic about the challenges: Long distance relationships can be challenging, and it's important to be realistic about the obstacles you'll face. These might include the cost of travel, the stress of being apart, and the difficulty of building intimacy and trust over long distances. It's important to acknowledge these challenges and work together to find solutions. 4. Stay connected: Communication is key in any relationship, but it's especially important in a long-distance relationship. Make an effort to stay in touch regularly through phone calls, texts, video chats, or whatever other means of communication works best for you. 5. Be patient and understanding: Long-distance relationships require patience, understanding, and a willingness to work through challenges together. Be patient with each other and understand that there will be ups and downs along the way. Ultimately, whether or not a long-distance relationship will work for you and your coworker depends on your individual circumstances and your willingness to put in the effort to make it work. If you both feel strongly about each other and are committed to making it work, then it's worth giving it a try. Q: At what point should I tell her that I am willing to move to her city to eliminate the distance? A: If you are willing to move to your coworker's city to eliminate the distance between you, it's important to have an open and honest conversation about it as soon as possible. This is a big decision that will have a significant impact on your life, so it's important to make sure that you are both on the same page before you make any concrete plans. You can start by telling her that you have been giving some thought to the distance between you and that you would be willing to move to her city if that's something she would be interested in. You can then ask her how she feels about the idea and if it's something she would be open to discussing further. It's important to approach this conversation with sensitivity and without putting any pressure on her. Moving to a new city is a big decision, and it's important to make sure that it's the right decision for both of you. Ultimately, the timing of this conversation will depend on your individual circumstances and how comfortable you both feel discussing it. If you feel like the relationship is progressing and you are both committed to making it work, then it might be a good idea to broach the topic sooner rather than later.
Is she purchasing drugs? Or cheating?
Don't base your self worth on the actions of a serial cheater. He's a horrible person. He does this to you because you come back. You are worth so much better than this. You are worth having someone who chooses you and is honest and good. You need to know that and not accept anything less. Choose to be single over being with this guy.
By your own admission even if you break up you’ll still get to talk to and hang with her plenty, likely to the frustration of her new bf. Just find someone else.
You guys are 1.5 years into finding out you are not compatible.
It wasn’t about the smoking, it’s the disrespect of her space (smoke lingers for so long…. You just can’t smell it because you are a smoker. All you had to do was walk outside or even to your own place, but you were lazy and didn’t care or respect her enough to do that.
Why do you seem more concerned about the friend, than your girlfriend?
Exactly this. Of course, it's her body and her choice but she has to live with him and decide if this is something worth causing a big issue over.