It’s only a Google away.. or text book. The cerebral cortex is what controls your decision making which is why we make most of our dumb decisions before 25 such as drinking and driving (most accidents occurring between 21-24) OR thinking any mentally healthy 40 year old man would introduce his 23 year old girlfriend to his kids within a few months of dating.
A fornicating Christian with a porn addiction trying to nag and pressure you into his religion? Perhaps he should consider practicing what he preaches before proselytizing to others. Any way, I personally would not tolerate that. If he is such a Christian then he should also know brow beating some one into going through the motions of converting is a darn waste of time if they do not believe. In it in their mind. I would tell him very firmly he is not to bother you about it ever again unless YOU are the one wanting to convert, and if he can’t accept you as you are now in your own beliefs or lack of, then don’t let the door hit him where the good lord split him.
Females have to worry about pregnancy more than men. ?♀️ “potential consequences” nobody is ever ready for lol even the ones that are…y’all ain’t compatible anyways though.
Not OP but as an adult I would say that old saying is not accurate. Most people do grow and learn. I would look at impulse control across all areas. If someone who cheats is always doing whatever they want with little regard for rules or anyone else, then yes they most likely will cheat again. That’s a personality type that’s hard to change.
It sounds like the only reason you’re contemplating staying in this relationship is because you’ve already sunk in 5 years. And I get it – staying together would feel like some quantifiable return on an investment, so to speak. You’ve put in 5 years of love and care into this, and it’d be amazing if all of that “paid off” by having this relationship work out long-term.
But I’d challenge you to consider that the “investment” here wasn’t ever intended to pay off that way. It wasn’t ever intended to result in this specific relationship being the one. The time that you’ve put in were intended to treat someone you loved well, to teach you how to be a good partner, to bring you happiness as long as it could, and to help you determine what you want in a life-long partnership – sure, it’d be great if you discovered she was that person and this was that partnership, but it was always about the discovery, not the result.
So your investment has paid off. You fell in love, treated her well, found happiness with her, and realized that ultimately this just isn’t what you want out of a lifelong partnership.
You are 100% right. All the caretaking and physical ailments would be much easier on me if her mood improved. I’m hoping her therapy helps with this and it will get better.
If you're going to throw those catholic middle school definitions around, you should be willing to accept that people grow up with different life experiences than you, and interpret language and their faith differently from you.
And she’s entitled to that decision and it’s not a small decision, in actuality agree with her, I wouldn’t move country for a relationship irrespective what logic you want to apply to it, it doesn’t matter, she’s entitled to “just not want to because it’s a huge step” and I can see the logic. Put that out of your mind as she’s given her reasoning, if you can’t move there as of now, move when you can which is why I said come up with a date of x…or this is just going to fail if there’s no closing the distance
I wouldn't push outing them. It may make you feel better, but not them. If they want to come out, it is their choice. They may have many reasons not to do so that do not involve you.
At best, I would make sure that my comments are always receptive and welcoming to folks in different sexual orientations.
Any talking to him will only show him that his constant attempts at contact work. It would reinforce them. If you already blocked him, but he keeps finding ways to still leave messages, ignoring him.
If it persists you may have to think about some kind of no-contact or restraining order, as this may evolve into harassment and stalking. It may actually already be there. You should tell all your friends that you have this issue, so they know not to give him any info about you, and that you need protection. Changing your phone number may help.
“I think if we continue to see each other it will keep hurting you because you clearly want something different from the relationship than I do, and I am not going to change my mind. You’re a great girl and I don’t want that for you, you deserve to be with someone who enthusiastically wants to be your boyfriend. So I think it’s best if we go our separate ways”
It’s only a Google away.. or text book. The cerebral cortex is what controls your decision making which is why we make most of our dumb decisions before 25 such as drinking and driving (most accidents occurring between 21-24) OR thinking any mentally healthy 40 year old man would introduce his 23 year old girlfriend to his kids within a few months of dating.
A fornicating Christian with a porn addiction trying to nag and pressure you into his religion? Perhaps he should consider practicing what he preaches before proselytizing to others. Any way, I personally would not tolerate that. If he is such a Christian then he should also know brow beating some one into going through the motions of converting is a darn waste of time if they do not believe. In it in their mind. I would tell him very firmly he is not to bother you about it ever again unless YOU are the one wanting to convert, and if he can’t accept you as you are now in your own beliefs or lack of, then don’t let the door hit him where the good lord split him.
If he doesn't care about your feelings he is no friend. Cut him off and continue to work on your mental health.
That's how abusers work. Once they have leverage they let loose.
You know, dildos don't throw tantrums or harbor sexist views, a huge advantage over the guy in question…
Females have to worry about pregnancy more than men. ?♀️ “potential consequences” nobody is ever ready for lol even the ones that are…y’all ain’t compatible anyways though.
Not OP but as an adult I would say that old saying is not accurate. Most people do grow and learn. I would look at impulse control across all areas. If someone who cheats is always doing whatever they want with little regard for rules or anyone else, then yes they most likely will cheat again. That’s a personality type that’s hard to change.
It sounds like the only reason you’re contemplating staying in this relationship is because you’ve already sunk in 5 years. And I get it – staying together would feel like some quantifiable return on an investment, so to speak. You’ve put in 5 years of love and care into this, and it’d be amazing if all of that “paid off” by having this relationship work out long-term.
But I’d challenge you to consider that the “investment” here wasn’t ever intended to pay off that way. It wasn’t ever intended to result in this specific relationship being the one. The time that you’ve put in were intended to treat someone you loved well, to teach you how to be a good partner, to bring you happiness as long as it could, and to help you determine what you want in a life-long partnership – sure, it’d be great if you discovered she was that person and this was that partnership, but it was always about the discovery, not the result.
So your investment has paid off. You fell in love, treated her well, found happiness with her, and realized that ultimately this just isn’t what you want out of a lifelong partnership.
You are 100% right. All the caretaking and physical ailments would be much easier on me if her mood improved. I’m hoping her therapy helps with this and it will get better.
Oral sex is sex so she's not a virgin anymore
If you're going to throw those catholic middle school definitions around, you should be willing to accept that people grow up with different life experiences than you, and interpret language and their faith differently from you.
Get out. And you shouldn’t date a 30 year old. He’s going to try to manipulate you and control you.
And she’s entitled to that decision and it’s not a small decision, in actuality agree with her, I wouldn’t move country for a relationship irrespective what logic you want to apply to it, it doesn’t matter, she’s entitled to “just not want to because it’s a huge step” and I can see the logic. Put that out of your mind as she’s given her reasoning, if you can’t move there as of now, move when you can which is why I said come up with a date of x…or this is just going to fail if there’s no closing the distance
I wouldn't push outing them. It may make you feel better, but not them. If they want to come out, it is their choice. They may have many reasons not to do so that do not involve you.
At best, I would make sure that my comments are always receptive and welcoming to folks in different sexual orientations.
If they are happy and no drama- don't poke it.
Any talking to him will only show him that his constant attempts at contact work. It would reinforce them. If you already blocked him, but he keeps finding ways to still leave messages, ignoring him.
If it persists you may have to think about some kind of no-contact or restraining order, as this may evolve into harassment and stalking. It may actually already be there. You should tell all your friends that you have this issue, so they know not to give him any info about you, and that you need protection. Changing your phone number may help.
“I think if we continue to see each other it will keep hurting you because you clearly want something different from the relationship than I do, and I am not going to change my mind. You’re a great girl and I don’t want that for you, you deserve to be with someone who enthusiastically wants to be your boyfriend. So I think it’s best if we go our separate ways”
So what advice are you looking for?