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mari-jimenez Public Chat Channel
Date: November 6, 2022
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WeekendPussy
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You should definitely not go. He invited you. He knows your financial situation. If this isn’t feasible then just say no.
Please don’t go and be unable to enjoy because of your worries, because then is it even worth it? Will you have to also bring gifts? Food and travel? Miscellaneous?
Your partner is operating from a space of financial privilege, and does not understand your situation, as it isn’t a reality he has lived. So I will communicate with him how wild that amount might be a drop in the bucket to him in that, though you work in the same physical spaces what you earn is very, very different.
Starting with an honest conversation about the trip and how you’ve felt/feel to open communication on the topic would be a good start. Though I would not put off having this conversation with him as the holidays are quickly approaching.
No shit. The guy needs to report and document it before she accuses him something far worse.
Whatever helps you sleep at night
Yes, I don't think of myself as a fully straight either but I don't want to sleep with a woman just to prove something or “see how I feel” while I'm in a relationship. What confuses me is that he loves me but wants to have sex with other people? It just doesn't make sense to me.
Granted, I don't identify as a bi male (which unfortunately is much more stigmatized) and I think he is battling with a lot of internalized homophobia. So maybe he sees a one night stand with a man as a taboo fantasy that is harder to get out of his head than I would fantasizing about other guys or girls?
I think that therapy would help him a lot with coming to terms with his sexuality, or I feel that is a much better way than sleeping with someone else. But he is resistant to going.
He said he felt unwelcomed and went on about his day since I didn’t seem to be willing to greet him. So he was 100% upset over that, not getting ready to have sex.
Is it truly possible for her to change? Or do I just need to accept this is who she is and compromise on my end?
Sure, it's possible for her to change, but she has to want to and she has to work hard at it.
The real question is: After a year of dating and seeing how selfish she is, do you want to stick around longer to find out whether she will ever fix herself? And if she does, how long it's going to take?
I wouldn't; I used to be with the male equivalent of her. I left him because the endless selfishness sucked the joy out of life! Immediately upon leaving him my life became happier and much more hopeful! There was time and energy for ME and for POSSIBILIES. Do yourself a favor and date more women; you're only 23yo.
If you're planning to go look for a problem you will always find it.
That’s for him to deal with. You do what you’re going to do for yourself regardless of how he feels about it.
Yes you're being paranoid
You are right, I guess I don’t know how to go about it without creating a lot of drama. I do need to grow a backbone and uninvite them. I just don’t think I have the evidence to go yo the guys wife and blow up her life.