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Date: October 23, 2022
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I’m a big believer that little things make a big difference. If you went all out and opened every single door for her when you were dating and then stopped unless it’s date night, she’ll pick up on that and think she did something wrong. Either do it every time or not at all. I don’t know what it is you’re looking for here. Find something else that requires even less effort, I guess
What your sis is doing is well within the range of normal, erring on the side of “healthier” rather than “unhealthier.” It isn't helicoptering to limit junk food, sweets or screen time, it's pretty judicious. The hair on the back of my neck still stands up when I remembering finding out what my 10-year-old was up to online back in the day. Kids that age really shouldn't have phones or social media, WTF. Most kids raised in a certain social or economic strata have planned activities daily. You say you know nothing of kids, and it seems like you're projecting your own desire for certain type of freedoms onto your nieblings. Stay in your lane on this one (And, for all you know, her kids freak out if they eat sugar or need the structure of activity to remain on track.)
Poor husband and sad “situation” . No- you do not meet up with the ex
You sound like a child “I’d commit a crime to get my child back, I have a particular set of skills, no I am not dumb”
I read the title and I don't need to read the rest of the post, should have left the first time and now you should defo leave, because if you stay she is just gonna keep doing it because there is literally 0 consequences to her actions. “I can keep cheating because he is clearly so pathetic he won't leave me”.
Get DNA Test and seek legal council
Your bf needs to talk to her and set boundaries. He needs to be the one to tell her not to do that kind of stuff because she's making him uncomfortable. And that you are his gf and she needs to be respectful of that.
Confrontation might make you uncomfortable but Dealing with it is a skill you are all going to need to learn to be successful adults.
Sadly it appears your first relationship was with an asshole. Regardless of why he did it, know that you are not at fault. Him blaming you for his cheating is a giant red flag. He is taking zero responsibility for his actions and not showing remorse or guilt even makes it worse.
I know it hurts now, but I promise you one day you’ll look back and be grateful that he is no longer in your life!
I really hope OP sees this comment.
OP your gf seems very immature for her age and has crossed boundaries . Messaging an ex with words of love is absolutely cheating and she should have had consequences at that time and you should have left the relationship as she is still hung up on her ex. Now as for the bday gift she clearly told you no gifts and you did exactly that you aren’t a mind reader and supposed to gift her something she didn’t ask for. She is behaving like a child and I think she is looking for a reason to break-up so go ahead and do it . You deserve to date an adult that respects you . You aren’t compatible and she is too high maintenance .
You have nothing to be concerned about. You should be as happy as you can be together.
I would cancel the shit out of that living arrangement. She has no boundaries and nothing will be off limits for her.