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lily_xs, 19 y.o.
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Date: November 27, 2022
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Am I misreading this post or something??? What does her father being a dick have to do with suing a company???
Well tell her how you feel. If you’re not ready you’re not ready. She can either accept it and wait or find someone who has the same sex drive as herself
They’ve been dating 2 months, I don’t think it’s fair to say he doesn’t love her, rather it’s literally been two months. I would never spend up to $600 on someone that soon, and honestly probably feel uncomfortable getting a gift worth that much like a month in.
Are you a people pleaser and find it difficult to say no?
As a general rule, it is never a good idea to get involved in the relationship between your partner & his family. Let them handle their family, you handle yours.
You also need to work on understanding wants vs. needs, and that what you want isn’t more important than what he needs, which right now, sounds like is to keep his relationship private.
Trust is gone. And if he travels a lot for work, it's possible it's happened before, and will happen again. He is only sorry because he was caught, that is all.
It is completely fair for her to ask you not to discuss that part of your life with her at all. That's a healthy boundary. But asking you to choose between your parents is not.
IMO? Tell her no. Tell her you will not discuss your father with her, but that you will not be forced to choose between your parents. That she can choose to remove herself from your life because she chose poorly when she procreated, but that you will not make it easy for her by choosing for her. If she hates her ex-husband more than she loves her son, she needs a therapist.
That might be the dumbest reason to break up I've ever read. Your relationship is great, you love each other and he defends you / stands up for you. Do you even realise how lucky you are? Have you seen all the posts of women staying with their shitty husbands who will let their families bully them and even side with them? You would quite frankly be an idiot to break up with him “to not get between him and his family”. Do you think that will help? He will not feel better having you gone, he will resent his family for being the reason he lost you, because they are the problem, not you.
Listen. I had my oldest son a month before I turned 23. I LOVE my son, he’s 16 now and I swear he is all the best parts of me and none of the bad. Like, he is the BEST kid, and I love him SO MUCH. However. Looking back, I was so young when I had him, and I made mistakes. So many mistakes. I am beyond blessed that he is who he is, and forgives me and loves me still. I know I was a much better mother to his now 8yo sister than I was to him, and that makes me feel like shit. It’s not like it was on purpose or anything, I just got older, calmer and more patient. I have apologised to him repeatedly for this, and he just says I’m the best mum and always have been (bless him). Don’t get me wrong, I loved him fiercely when he was a baby, as I do now. But I was so young. I look back and think ‘I thought I was so grown’ and I laugh at myself. I would suggest you wait a few years. I promise, it will be easier and you will be a better parent with a little more life experience
You can do both because it's your wedding. You can tell everyone to suck it up for one day because it's your day and they better shape up or ship out. Adults need to be adults not just your parents but actual adults.
so you are feeling that he is slowly distancing himself from you. that is relatable.
i dont know how both of you communicate, but it seems like you two fit each other.
what you do next is up to you. what i would do is just relax. you chasing after him and trying to prove isnt going to help. i would wait and want him to text and talk.
maybe he needs time, maybe not. who knows what he is thinking. but you reaching out wont help, because he already knows what he wants.
i dont know how often you two talk. just let him be and you be you. it’s hard i know, try to write down feelings as they come so you can unload them from your mind
you reached out to him about you being anxious. i dont find it fair that he disregards your feelings and blames you. it is just not productive.
to sum it up: patience:)