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Date: December 6, 2022
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Okay hi, I’m another female somnophiliac.
I love the idea of doing things to my husband in his sleep and vice versa. Planning a day definitely takes the excitement out. Kinda like Christmas Day as a kid, where you know it’s happening and you can’t sleep!
My agreement with my husband is if I wake up and panic, stop. That’s that. But the idea of what she’s asking is she basically wants to be unconsciously pleasured, and be told how she reacted, while enjoying the subconscious benefits. When I did I’ve done this to my husband, he’s reacted much more intensely than when he’s awake.
With that being said, it’s definitely scary thinking you’re going to hurt the person you love in case they’re not in the mood.
My advice is to wait for a night where you can tell things are heating up, or have already gone all the way, and you KNOW they’re into it. Sometimes a signal before bed. Mine is “I’m not wearing undies and I’ve made a few sexy comments.”
But also, the full and complete understanding that this is a kink and no harm is meant by it if you wake up and don’t like it and that it can immediately be stopped.
It’s a slippery surface if you’re unsure. My husband and I are secure and sure about our relationship and waking up confused and scared but immediately being comforted is okay – we’ve thought about these possibilities.
Please feel free to message me if you want a chat about this! It’s a strange and messy kink? Same realm as CNC. Takes a very trusting partner to want to act this out!
Regardless if gender, if ANYONE is too drunk to consent, it’s legally assault.
I’m sorry you don’t like the legal definition, but the law doesn’t care about your feelings.
And yes, I am a lawyer.
Nah, it's already emotionally cheating by that stage.
It's just whether or not it was physical.
No, I do not agree. It's a different dynamic when it's your parents, versus just a friend or something. It's nuanced.
Even if you're an adult, you might still need them in your life and lean on them, it doesn't mean condoning their every action. You're free to cut off parents over infidelity if you like, or indeed for any reason, but I strongly feel that it should (as much as possible) stay between the parents in an attempt to not let it impact their relationships with their kids. I understand the mum's hurt, trust me, but I also think she's putting OP in a terrible position, when he's an innocent party in it.
I'm saying this as a kid of parents that split up, in part, because of cheating.
It takes real effort to be this stupid and derail logic.
Nothing you said is medical care.
In my custody agreement with the father, and he did not want custody. It was in the agreement that I was not allowed to move out of the area we were in. I couldn't go out of state without permission for a vacation even. This was 25 years ago. You should speak to an attorney about your concerns, they may be able to set some of your fears to rest.
It has become better for fathers in recent years in custody agreements. It is no longer a given that the mother will be the custodial parent.
Yes you are being toxic and no you shouldn’t make it her problem
You want him to be mindful of your fear of abandonment but your not emphatic to his fear of confrontation.
Not enough information about him or your overall relationship to know if he’ll come back. Not all men are alike.
I guess the only reactions and emotions she is allowed to have are the same that you would have had. Does that carry over to all situations?
Break up with her. You’re exhausting.
Definitely a negative in Alice that she accepts someone that can do that.
Thanks for your reply! I guess I just wasn't sure bcuz other guys I've met before have been way hornier with me, and I was worried it had to do with my looks or something (I hope not cuz I find him really attractive and it's an ego boost to me personally if he thought the same of me as well).