You are not guilty! Perhaps you could have been a bit more tactful. But, you did not create this problem. He brought it on all by himself. He doesn't deserve to have a wife that wants a committed, sharing, and mutually beneficial relationship.
Don’t be concerned about getting with girls, because what leads to mature people forming connections for something other than a quid pro quo – sexual and romantic, platonic – is a sense that the other person thinks of them as a person.
You are more concerned about your sexual prospects with other people than this woman whom you cast as a friend in this story. If she wasn’t your friend, she was in your friend group, and now you’re more concerned about the poisoned well than what you did to her and demonstrated about yourself.
Not the person who you replied to, but that’s what stands out to me. If you were a decent person, you’d be more focused on the distrust you sowed in an individual, not how to avoid further consequences.
You should be focused on improving your thought processes .
Almost everyone is saying she is controlling you. I don't see that in your texts.
She told you 3 weeks after you both decided to become exclusive. This is a good time to realise what you want and don't want in a relationship. She feels uncomfortable with your ex and that is her right. Also you have the right to tell her you don't want to cut her off.
as she can't learn to accept it in the future.
See, she doesn't want that for her and doesn't say “I forbid you…”. She says “I can't learn to accept it in the future”. That is sooo different. The second sentence is mature.
I also discussed all the topics that need to be said at the beginning of the relationship with my bf. We both agreed on so many things. We also told each other if one is uncomfortable with something, we either come to a compromise or we end it. That's not controlling.
‘Stop talking about my body unless it’s something nice. This is effecting my self esteem. These comments can last a very long time in my mind. I don’t appreciate this talk.’
This talk is learned behavior and it can be stopped. every time he has something negative to say I would make sure I had a good line about him in my pocket too.
Seems weird to me. I won’t immediately jump to cheating because something tells me you’re just not on the same page about your relationship. Have you had a conversation about how things are going thus far?
I’d think it’s weird if someone was calling me their girlfriend but they’d never met or hung out with my friends or family. Not putting this on you just that it’s also very weird on her side
Yea absolutely. The post is bad on its own for sure
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From what OP said in the post, it sounds like 8 months from breakup to now, which is crazy quick IMO
You are out of line. Also, what's the legal drinking age in your country?
You are not guilty! Perhaps you could have been a bit more tactful. But, you did not create this problem. He brought it on all by himself. He doesn't deserve to have a wife that wants a committed, sharing, and mutually beneficial relationship.
Just a heads up, addiction is primarily a response to trauma. Many/most people can take opioids and amphetamines without becoming addicts.
Don’t be concerned about getting with girls, because what leads to mature people forming connections for something other than a quid pro quo – sexual and romantic, platonic – is a sense that the other person thinks of them as a person.
You are more concerned about your sexual prospects with other people than this woman whom you cast as a friend in this story. If she wasn’t your friend, she was in your friend group, and now you’re more concerned about the poisoned well than what you did to her and demonstrated about yourself.
Not the person who you replied to, but that’s what stands out to me. If you were a decent person, you’d be more focused on the distrust you sowed in an individual, not how to avoid further consequences.
You should be focused on improving your thought processes .
Almost everyone is saying she is controlling you. I don't see that in your texts.
She told you 3 weeks after you both decided to become exclusive. This is a good time to realise what you want and don't want in a relationship. She feels uncomfortable with your ex and that is her right. Also you have the right to tell her you don't want to cut her off.
as she can't learn to accept it in the future.
See, she doesn't want that for her and doesn't say “I forbid you…”. She says “I can't learn to accept it in the future”. That is sooo different. The second sentence is mature.
I also discussed all the topics that need to be said at the beginning of the relationship with my bf. We both agreed on so many things. We also told each other if one is uncomfortable with something, we either come to a compromise or we end it. That's not controlling.
Oh yeah they always get thrown out regardless of the stain. My sheets in my bachelor days would get sweat stains lol, even they'd get tossed
your gut is always right. Be strong. You got this.
‘Stop talking about my body unless it’s something nice. This is effecting my self esteem. These comments can last a very long time in my mind. I don’t appreciate this talk.’
This talk is learned behavior and it can be stopped. every time he has something negative to say I would make sure I had a good line about him in my pocket too.
Seems weird to me. I won’t immediately jump to cheating because something tells me you’re just not on the same page about your relationship. Have you had a conversation about how things are going thus far?
I’d think it’s weird if someone was calling me their girlfriend but they’d never met or hung out with my friends or family. Not putting this on you just that it’s also very weird on her side