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Golden Ticket Show In Progress. Tip 25 to join the show
Date: October 31, 2022
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WeekendPussy
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200_FREE_TOKEN_SPRING_SURPRISE
Came to the comments for this.
I would honestly ask for an explanation and if this is really how he wants to end it with you?
The worst case he doesn’t answer and you can know you tried. It’s messed up the way he did it but all the pre breakup things sound like he really liked you. I’m wondering if there’s something going on other than him moving. People have long distance relationships all the time.
Not better 🙁
You need a new therapist. Any therapist worth a damn would tell you you can't cling to a past that's gone, especially when the present version of this man is escalating his abuse of you.
When I have been telling him when he ask for sex that I’m sorry I’ve been very sick and having a lot of pain and completely deprived of any energy as im high risk with pcos and endometriosis but we still would have sexy 3-4 times a week since I’ve been sick making sure I’m not completely denying him of sex even when I don’t feel good just so I can please him
The problem isn’t her it’s him. He doesn’t want to set boundaries with her. And clearly likes the attention. If he actually respected your relationship he would’ve corrected this a long time ago. Can’t make him choose you or her when he’s already picked what he wants based off his actions.
Protect yourself and your finances sis, dont put his name on it if he didnt work for it
Why are you making excuses for him? Legit just saw a post about a woman’s husband killing her dog and this is how it starts. Get rid of the kitten if you won’t leave to protect it.
Why have I read “don’t stick your dick in crazy” then?
Do you want to be friends with her? Sounds like she is just using you when convenient and will throw you to the side again when you are not needed, i am struggling to see a reason for you to keep contact with her
You guys should discuss what appropriate or not to say when you're in a relationship
This sounds like a 12 year old wrote this.
Wow talk about a question with double standards lol. Leave dude. . Two people can change eachother for the better or for the worse. And to all you out there that say no one should wanna change you in a relationship. News flash your whole world shifts and your priorities with them. You change dramatically depending on how far you are willing to go to meet your partner half way in what they and you want in the relationship. And this conversation of change will be in your talks for the rest of your life. If it doesnt you might wanna question weather the other really cares enough about you to consider why you want changed. Its amazing that two people can come together and understand eachother enough and long enough to build something they both want together. Its fucking hard and alot of work. So if you wanna stay start working bud, and talk as much as you can so that the you and the other person can decide weather you both are ready for the next step. If not you will not make the one after that. Time for a long talk about feelings and change or a change to a new life. . But maybe most of these people are right you cant help a thirsty person with water. .
ah i see it all started when she randomly texted me saying hello and how she wants to apologise for everything that she has done to my gf and asking me to send my gf her apology. i thought that was the end of our conversation but she kept texting me every day. i had no option but to reply since i saw her around every day and i wouldnt want her walking up to me and asking me anything as i genuinely dont want anything to do w her. i wouldnt mind my gf texting my ex as long as i know there isnt something going on, and i know that seems hypocrytical on my end, i take the full blame for everything that has happened. i shouldve tried much harder to distance myself and blocked her way sooner.
This is the way. Honest communication is the best move here.
He made his bed, will he lay in it? That's up to you.
He walked out once before, meaning he probably will do it again.
Protect yourself, learn from your mistakes.
You’re 22 a guy like this will come along within six months to a year. Just let it go currently you weren’t ready and you’re going back-and-forth so much you’re still not ready.
It's not your fault. The mom is blaming you as a coping mechanism for her grief. Ignore her for some time.
yta, your wife has put up with your parents bs for years and has had it. You've literally done nothing to see her side and keep siding with your nasty parents. You're supposed to be a partner to your wife not your parents lap dog. Do yourself a favor and go check out r/justnomil and see all the posts from women who've had to put up with their spouses bs when it comes to their inlaws and see how often it leads to no contact or divorce because that's where you're headed, divorce because you DO NOT LISTEN to your to what your wife has been saying for years. Enjoy your divorce
Bro I’m going to be a little harsh, you are completely brainwashed by her and you have no sense of what a relationship really is. You need to leave her ASAP, go NC and start therapy. If not then I wish you all the luck in the world bc my god do you need it.
Dear reddit, my SO never washes himself and refuses to care about me or our child, I found out he wants to cheat on me with his coworker. What do?? 🙁
I swear my heart goes out to these people but I also groan that they can't see the forest for the trees but still post here, laying it all out on the table.
Don’t. That was his mama and daddy job. You need to leave and keep the kewchie dookie free!!
She could still buy practical things. Clothes, nappies, essential. Even make a baby hamper, which is something I did for baby showers and presents.
So she is 30, dating a 22 year old. Didn't disclose to him that she is HIV positive. She got pregnant and she already has 3 others?
You need to get better friends OP. Your friend sounds like at predator and asshole at worst and like an incredibly inmature and stupid child at best.
Typically I'd say it's an error bc my boyfriend's has been a little off at times, we will be somewhere together and his will lag and still show him places we were before or show us at places near where we actually are. But the way she reacted tells a different story.
In a relationship, people communicate. If she wasn’t at work or at home, the two places she’s expected to be, then she should communicate. No one cares if she was running an errand or visiting family or friends. She didn’t communicate, then got super defensive and started CRYING, and ran out of the house. How is it his “little outburst?” She’s the one who freaked out when asked a simple question.
I’m 220 and 5’9. (can’t comment on race cuz I’m white but can comment on weight)
I have zero problem attracting dudes, including fit ones. Lots of them only want to smash unfortunately, but in general i think dating nowadays is just fucking hard. Especially the older you get. Finding real is hard.
My uncle is my manager who hired me
You cannot possibly be this obtuse
Where do you live? Because it’s not unusual for moisture in the air to make certain surfaces wet at 2:30 in the morning, depending on the climate you live in. Also, if you believe the car and tires were wet because he went somewhere, did you check to see if his engine was warm while you were checking his tires?
I’ve been with my share of women who were suspicious of me in our relationship and it was because they were quote- unquote used to being cheated on. They wouldn’t believe that I’m a one-woman man. Things would be fine once I reiterated my love for them but as soon as I was out of sight, they begged me to “just admit it, it’s okay. I won’t be mad, I just want you to tell me…”
Have you told him straight up that you’re suspicious of him cheating? Would he be willing to have a calm conversation about it?
He may just get a taste of his own medicine because him doing all of that behind her back with his ex is super untrustworthy and a violation of boundaries
You should know that 42 is pretty much the cut off for natural conception . Google the age a woman is most likely to get pregnant. Your girlfriend at 40 cannot guarantee you a children. It is really a maybe at this point . Do not get your hopes up..Yes she can get pregnant but do not count on that scenario..It sounds like she likes you enough to try.
This really depends on you. Maybe she would agree to adoption but that may be a deal breaker. How much do you love her?
You are comparing not eating animals to abortion? Wtf.
You don't need his permission to break up
This is the issue with a ten year age difference at such a young age – there's a natural power dynamic that's been corrupted. And he feels that power and his ego can't help but wield it when he's triggered.
This will get worse, and more violent. Call a domestic abuse hotline, get help with your perspective. Get help getting out
This post has reached one of our comment/karma limits. The text of the post has been preserved below.
My gf of 4 years has slowly but surely killed our bedroom life, and is now claiming it is due to the guilt and feeling awkward with me because of the cheating she has done in our past. She is now making it very hard for us to have any sexual activity at all and is claiming she doesn’t like sex in a relationship as it makes her feel dirty now & that I should accept that a relationship with her will be with no sex, this doesn’t seem right to ask this of me after everything and not to mention the tiny fact Iv forgiven her for infidelity??
It's never too late to dump a cheater.
Her religious mom probably never taught her anything about genitals or hygiene. Because it was taboo.
This. She’s satisfied her unstable sexual urges and is looking for stable love.
It makes her feel good.
Like when a girl finally gets into shape, she starts wearing tighter clothes, maybe show some stomach. Makes her feel better about herself. Has nothing to do with attention it has to do with confidence
First of all you clearly have a postpartum depression and you need to go psychologist to deal with that I can't help you
Now If you and your boyfriend weren't together when you slept with the other guy it is technically not cheating but you need to be sincere with him and if you have doubts about the origin of the baby you should do a DNA test to make sure
He might get mad or sad about you having sex with other people and he has the right to not wanting to see you anymore but he is still having responsibilities with the kids, at least the kids he made
If you don't do this it will only get worst for everyone
Are you for real? This advice is the most selfish, absurd advice someone could give. GIVE THIS POOR WOMAN THE OPPORTUNITY TO FIND SOMEONE WHO WANTS TO MARRY HER OR AT LEAST LET HER FIGURE OUT IF SHE IS OK WITH NEVER BEING MARRIED. YOU UNBELIEVABLE SCUM!!!!!
It is indeed your choice to keep the child. But now you have to live with the consequences of that choice. I think the reason people aren’t responding to you well is because you have expectations of your partner that are completely unrealistic and unfair to him. It makes sense that he doesn’t want a baby now or with a person he stated dating a few months ago, and you seem to have the idea that keeping the baby will make him change.
Ask yourself, is a part of the reason you kept the baby was because you hoped he’d make a magical turnaround and be the best dad ever? It’s not going to happen.
Maybe you both need to give it a rest with the porn
Google the term and explore it. It’s a manipulative tactic. Your man is a festival of red flags. I see from another comment you have a child together, so just breaking up might be hard, but please do at least consider if your relationship is meeting your needs and if it isn’t, start advocating for yourself more. Your needs and feelings are just as valid and important as his, so don’t let him manipulate or dismiss or talk you out of that.
In my mind ‘Close to home or over there‘ meaning the restaurant which was an hour away. he answered his friends house. the group meeting up are from all over. Some hours away and some a few mins away. The people in his car at the time I unfortunately barely know them let alone what town they live in and he knows this.
I realise i should have added this context to the text above.
This could be outside on the US and 30k not being necessarily bad.
It's now because she pretty obviously wants more experience with more guys…
Hoes gonna ho, bro!
Stalkers have a mental defect that doesn’t go away. I promise.
It varies between once every 2-3 weeks
It varies once every 2-3 weeks on average
Better late than never. Telling her and not stringing her on any longer.
She's gone dude. Sorry for you. You did the last thing out of love that you could. Told her the truth. You did your duty now move on and find a partner who also wants to be childfree.
“He’s so genuine “ your entire post is about how fraudulent he is be honest with yourself and leave him
Interesting age gap yet again…
If your girlfriend spoke french, wouldn't you want to learn it so you could communicate more effectively?
That depends on what your intention was. Were you intending to make him feel bad? Were you hoping your words would make him spend more time talking to you and apologizing further? If yes to either of these or anything similar then yes it’s manipulative.
So that’s what she wants in a relationship and if it’s not what you want then you should also not want to get back together.
lololololol you fucked around and found out. I'm playing the world's tiniest violin rn.
Bro, she's in the wrong. You asked her to block him, she lied about it and kept talking to this guy. That right there lets you know, that, this guy “friend” is more important to her than your relationship's stability.
I can’t get over it. I crave for her presence.
You do realise that your ex said you could catch up “that very night” was because you were in a vulnerable emotional state and his intention was to take advantage of it. Taking you from bar to bar and doing drugs. That ex is NOT a friend.
K
Yeah. She is. One who’s expressed repeatedly that she hates small children-her siblings. Why is she treating family that way? She’s a grown ass woman. ??♀️
Dude at your age putting up with that shit? Nah. (ノ-_-)ノ~ uɐɯ ǝloɥʍ ǝɥʇ …
Please stop spying on your sister and thinking about her sex life.
Just be a good brother and let her live.
It sounded deliberate from what OP said and he said he did it due to a trauma reaction. And the fact he was doing it all over her torso and face instead of turning away sounds intentional. Dude needs therapy.
It sounded deliberate from what OP said and he said he did it due to a trauma reaction. And the fact he was doing it all over her torso and face instead of turning away sounds intentional. Dude needs therapy.
I checked the earlier post, and the way you asked did indeed seem more like a summon than invitation, which probably made her uncomfortable.
By reflecting on that situation with advantage of he hindsight, you will improve your communication for the next time.
Good luck, OP.
You flipped genders so many times in a short post I'm not really sure what you're writing
Simple answer is : no
You have that option to say as many times as you want
She did the right thing and isn't even trying to stop you from being his friend but here's the thing. He really isn't your friend if he is going to shoot that kind of shot. He violated the bro code. He was willing to lose you as a friend in his delusional thoughts that your girlfriend would somehow leave you for him after confessing his feelings.
Friendships come and go sometimes and this one's gotta go. Friends don't act like that.
Can you please elaborate?
And what? If you can’t read, get off reddit
Straight forward is the best way
A. He had t even spoken up about any of this, he just agreed to it. If he’s struggling and needs a new deal, he can open his mouth and use his words.
B. Why are so many insistent that you should have to completely cover someone simply because you’re in a relationship with them? Is mooch a new love language?
Sorry, I forgot to add that he did pay me back. He always does that. both your reactions make me feel a bit more alleviated because they confirm my feelings. I feel kinda gaslighted or manipulated but sometimes I can't tell whether I am overreacting and I don't know whether his reactions are ''normal'' because it is my first relationship and I have close to 0 experience with other men.
Real people in porn are still not on dating apps. And people who post on dating apps don’t want you masurbating to them. That is still disgusting if you think of all social medias like that. A dating app is a dating app. Weirdos can turn anything into porn and sexualize anything. Doesn’t make it right.
I am definitely female lol, I don't seem to have opinions that match with most women on here. A lot of you seem to be extremely left leaning and I honestly don't think your opinions make sense the majority of the time.
This isn't about my personal guilt, it is an ethical opinion that two consenting adults under the influence of alcohol having sex isn't rape. All of you are very quick to jump on blaming this man because OP isn't attracted to him and she regrets having sex with him. Regretting having sex with someone doesn't make it rape nor does being intoxicated if the other person was as well. I'm not denying that the guy friend sounds like an absolute weirdo and clearly doesn't respect OP or her marrige but that doesn't make him a rapist.
Honestly I think OP just desperately wants out of her abusive marriage and last night was a breaking point for her.
Why are you even here if you refuse to listen to feedback
Hey man. This is such a tough spot. You've been with her for five years, which I'd a good long time and it sounds like you were thinking of the future. I know it can be hard here because that time is important. Take a look at sunk cost though. Essentially that says you shouldn't stay in a job/relationship/etc just because you've put time into it. Sure, you put time into this, but leaving it doesn't negate anything and could be a good step foe you.
Hearing your girlfriend's thoughts on this, just note that with this approach you may start hearing, “We'll he refused to do a background check, so that must prove he is untrustworthy, which is why he broke up.” It's the circular logic that some people need to validate themselves. The idea that he must do what I ask for MY piece of mind and if he doesn't he is at fault, there can't be another reason. I think right now you can't win in either situation. Either you move forward with a background check and therapy to allay her fears, or you say no and walk out of the relationship. In either instance, she can and likely will spin this so she is the affected party and the person who is most impacted here, not you.
I think you're making the right decision with wanting to step away. It sounds like she needs therapy to process this. From her approach here, it would be really hard to come back from the trust removed. What is her response when you ask her about her trusting you? Does her friend's scenario now remove the five years of trust you've built? When you're in your 40s and a friend of hers experiences a divorce, would the years together be irrelevant in your relationship?
If Animal Control did nothing then why is she losing the dog? I'm so confused.
And, if she sees this as complete abandonment then that's up to her. You cannot manage her emotions for her and you cannot control her choices.
You also cannot set yourself on fire to keep her warm.
Its normal because we stigmatize mental health and created a really fucking depressing existence for ourselves. This person clearly needs therapy to process this shit.
It's literally nothing
Record all your conversations from now on, without him knowing. This guy is a manipulator and it might come in handy.
Why do you want to be with this man? He's a dick. Get out now, while your baby is still in the hospital. It's much easier to hunt for housing when not toting a baby around. There is no salvation for this relationship.
Girl it's called the garbage, use it
Oh lord, who is still raising these boys to think that they just have to get older and land a “wife” and they’ll never have to clean their room or feed themselves again?
This is no longer reality in the modern day, and some people have not caught up.
It’s wrong if you continue to be in a relationship with someone you don’t have feelings for. End the relationship officially. Breakups are hard on people but she’ll get over it.
So down he became straight up
Reading through the comments i see that Reddit bias strikes again 😀 Clearly these two are not compatible. However since it's the woman who doesn't like something then the “dude is the asshole”.
No, no, no, no, no. That's internalised misogyny. There's absolutely nothing wrong with having a full filling sex life for yourself. You're not something that can be used. And guys don't need trapping. In a world with so many people there's no reason to settle for this crap. You can find someone who you love and you will love you, don't accept mistreatment.
You need to be honest with her about how you feel. If you want only FWB but she wants a full on relationship, you need to let her go. It’s not fair to her any other way.
I should have been more clear, it's not all the time. But it is something I'm working on eliminating from my behavior even more.
I do want to give it a chance, but not to the point where it becomes unbearable.
And that is on you to understand about yourself.
What your personal limits? What are you willing to go through, in order achieve potential.
My rule of thumb… Once I am in pain. I pay attention. I am willing to go through a little pain to get through it. But I am not willing to live in it.
So, whatever your limits are, that is on you and you need to protect yourself when its required.
Start to think about a plan B by yourself because this guy is in for a big life lesson.
I would refrain from insulting a person bound to react with anger flares.
That could make the torch erupt. She wants him off smoothly.
I think having a honeymoon is the last thing on his mind right now
OP says that the cheating thing isn’t the first time it’s happened in that last little paragraph. The boss thing was a separate occasion meaning there was more than one tryst
Take the job, leave him.
A good partner would never do such things.
You might Google PMDD and see if that applies. That can usually be managed with Prozac or other antidepressants used “off label” with good results. I haven’t personally dealt with it but have had several friends who have.
But it definitely sounds like you have some tendencies towards misophonia during these episodes—and maybe all the time but after a stressful week or during your period, it’s exacerbated. I know that for me, as I spend most of my work days running meetings/workshops, I’m pretty peopled out and just lack patience and the ability to self regulate as well.
You have more than a decade on this woman of course she is going to be immature. What’s your excuse?
Otherwise the same advice as everyone else gets: once your partner show you who they are you need to accept those things or break up .
I told my best friend j liked her and she said sorry i can only offer fwb right now and i was like oh okay. Immediately the next day I felt better and totally normal towards her because i guess j just needed that rejection to get me over my crush. And we're still best friends.
Why wouldn’t he tell you everything is fine, that he loves you, and make time for you?
You’re then creating an argument with no basis. You’re not early into the relationship. This isn’t a “phase.” It’s the two of you trying to work towards a healthy relationship.
Independence is important and healthy in a relationship. Not seeing each other every single day doesn’t make you any less in love. It just helps you learn the ability not to rely entirely on your partner for your happiness. You shouldn’t “need” a partner; you should “want” a partner. You should be happy on your own. A partner should be a bonus.
Breakup
Awe so that’s a thing? And just so we don’t “freak out?” Ok thanks ik what to do now.
He doesn't sound very respectful, I wouldn't go out with him again.
As a grown ass man you make choices for the benefit or detriment of the relationship.
??????
This guy is a manipulator. He lied straight to your face. Explaining why you are breaking contact really only gives him the opportunity to manipulate you. Plus given he didn't respect you enough to be honest why does he deserve any explanation at all?
Just block him. He knows what he is doing, he will do the math.
Why don't you block her and stop giving a fuck what she does on her social media?
also to add to the buying of toys, i also meant to say i do know she has bought toys for herself, but i dont know where she puts them its like they disappeared
If I wait most of the day, I usually get a text from him asking about my day or a “good morning” text bc he sleep schedule is messed up from working late.
Thank you for this, it really helps.